~{Chapter 14}~

Matt does not answer and just stares at me like I am a ghost. I pick up his small dog and stand in front of him, waiting for him to say something.

"Kate, what are you doing here?" Matt asks all of a sudden.

I hesitate. "That's what I want to talk to you about."

He slips his sunglasses on as a few people pass by us. He picks my purse up and gestures for me to follow him. I follow him to his house where I had been going for the past few days to find him.

We reach his house, and he unlocks the door and holds the door open for me. I step inside and gently put his dog on the floor. Matt sets my purse on his couch as he slips his sunglasses off and takes the leash off his dog. His dog immediately runs off.

"Do you want me to take your coat?" he asks.

I shake my head as I take my coat off. "I'll just set it on top of my bag."

He nods and sits down on a chair beside the couch. I sit down on the couch and awkwardly try to think of something to say to him.

"What are you doing here? How did you find the park?" he finally asks.

I sigh. "Your father gave your address to me. He came to town, and he told me that you seem different."

Matt gives me a hard look. "So that's the only reason why you're here. You came at the request of my dad, and you want to fix me. Well, guess what? I don't need fixing."

He stands up and begins to pace around.

"That's not why I'm here. It's not what you think," I say.

He stares at me and harshly says, "How am I supposed to know what to think when you're still wearing that ring? How am I supposed to know what to think when you randomly show up without an explanation?"

My face heats up, and I stand up. "If you would let me speak, you might get a chance to hear why I'm here! Then again, you're the one who left and let what happened ruin our friendship."

"You're the one who said no without an explanation," he says, his face growing redder by the second.

"I didn't run away."

His face turns red. "I didn't cheat on someone. I didn't lead anyone on."

I become very angry. "I never cheated on anyone, and I never led anyone on! Matt, you're heartless. I came to explain everything to you, and I'm being accused of cheating and being a jerk!"

I pick my purse and coat up before hurrying to the door and quickly walking out and back to my hotel. I hoped he would run after me, but he did not. I wipe away a couple of tears before forcing myself to stop.

When I get to the hotel, I lie down on the bed and turn the TV on. I mindlessly watch and read.

I am angry. How dare he accuse me of cheating and leading him on! I was trying to make peace with him, and he blamed me for things I never did. I wanted to have his friendship back again, but it does not look like I can. I sigh and close my eyes for a second.

Knock, knock.

My eyes fly open, and I get off the bed. I smooth my hair in the mirror before opening the door. I swing the door open and am greeted with a distressed looking Matt.

I take a deep breath and ask, "What?"

"Listen," he starts, "I know you probably hate me and never want to speak to me again, but I'm here to apologize for what I said earlier. What I said was uncalled for and a horrible thing to say. You have no idea how guilty I've been feeling. I'm extremely sorry."

I sigh. "I'll always need and want to speak to you. How did you know where I was?"

His eyes twinkle. "I called my dad. He told me where you were staying, and I hurried over here as fast as New York City traffic would allow."

I smile. "Can we start again?"

"Yes, but why don't we go to a restaurant to eat an early dinner? I think it would be easier for us to talk if we both had some food in our system," he says.

"Let me grab my coat and purse," I say before closing the door and hurrying to pick my things up. I check my phone and see that it is five o'clock. I had been moping for a long time. I laugh at my silliness as I open the door back up.

Matt smiles. "You ready?"

I nod and follow him out of the hotel to his car. Being the gentleman he is, he opens the passenger door for me and then hurries around to the driver's seat. He drives as fast as the traffic would allow. Soon, he drives up to a small restaurant that seems to be in a quiet, hidden place.

He parks and then hurries around to open my door. He helps me out and closes my door. He gently puts his hand on the small of my back to lead me inside.

"I recently discovered this place, and I love coming here because it is out of the way, and nobody seems to care that I'm a singer," Matt explains as we step inside the small, cozy restaurant.

A bubbly old lady greets him before seating us in a corner of the restaurant. I slip my coat off and set it on the back of my chair with my purse hanging on the corner.

"It's a really cute place! The lady seems really sweet, too," I say.

"Yeah. She really seems to like me."

I laugh. "She reminds me of your aunt."

He laughs. "I can see it! How is she?"

A waitress brings us glasses of water, and I squeeze a lemon in my glass and stir it around. "She's pretty good."

We manage to find things to talk about up until we finish our food. He pays the bill but does not make a move to get up.

"Why are you here?" he asks.

I blush. "I'm going to tell you here?"

"We can go to my house, but I'm anxious to know. I want this conversation to go better than last time," he replies.

I nod and stand up. He follows my lead and leads me out to his car. The drive to his house is full of tense silence. I try to think of the words I should say to him. Before I know it, we are at his house, and I am sitting crisscross applesauce on his l-shaped couch, and he is sitting across from me.

"Where do I start?" I say aloud.

Matt smiles. "Just start from the beginning. Your ring could be a good start."

I sigh and look down at my ring before sliding it off. I stare at it, and my words soon come to me. I take a deep breath.

I talk as if I am talking to myself. "I was a homeless teen girl running around in the streets when I met him. He was not what I expected, yet I found happiness when I was with him. He led me to Christ and gave me hope for my future. I owe a lot to him. I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for him and Beth."

Matt clears his throat, and I look up. "Who is this guy you're talking about?"

I hesitate before giving Matt a small smile. I move closer to him and place the ring in the palm of his hand so he can look at it. He looks down at it.

I softly say, "James. James was everything I needed and wanted. This ring is a symbol of our love. You were right the first time you ever saw me. Do you remember?"

Matt looks at me. "I'll never forget that day."

He places the ring back in my hand, and I say, "I was still bound to him when I first met you."

Matt sighs. "Where is he, then?"

I take a deep breath. "James was everything I wanted and needed, but there was one thing that changed that. He was in the military."

"Was?" Matt asks.

I take Matt's hand in mine. "Matt, I met you only a few months after learning of James' death. The reason I still wear this ring is because I still need time to release him completely. I still need to be reminded of his love. Matt, you have no idea how badly I wanted to say yes to your question. I couldn't accept it because it wouldn't be fair to you. I'm still grieving. I'm still learning to live life with joy and happiness. My joy was taken from me, and I had to find my joy again. Matt, I need your friendship. Please don't take that away from me."

Silent tears are falling, and Matt seems too shocked to speak. I slip the ring back on my finger and try to find something else to say.

Matt squeezes my hand softly and gently puts a finger under my chin and lifts my head to where we are eye level. "Never."

In that moment, I can feel myself relax, and I feel like I got my friend back. Matt pulls me towards him, and I lean into his shoulder as he comforts me. I let some of my tears of frustration, sadness, and joy flow.

"I'm sorry," he whispers.

I shake my head. "Don't be."

For the few minutes I cry, Matt is there hugging me and comforting me. He does not speak, but I know he understands. I know he cares, and I know he is going to be there from now on.

After a few minutes, I sit up and wipe my tears away. He also sits up and puts his hand on the small of my back.

"You okay?" he asks.

I turn my head and smile at him. "Definitely. There's just one more thing I need to tell you."

His eyes sparkle with amusement as he says, "Darn it! I thought this crying fest was over!"

I laugh. "I promise I won't cry."

He smiles. "You can cry as much as you want. I've been told I'm a good shoulder to cry on."

"And who said that?" I ask as I raise my eyebrow.

"Not important."

I laugh. He smiles and helps me up from the couch. He leads me to the kitchen and makes me sit down at the kitchen island. He hands me a few tissues and walks over to his freezer.

"This is what I've been told helps with tears," he says as he sets a container of chocolate ice cream in front of me.

I smile and clear my throat. "I have to tell you the real reason why I'm here."

His face goes serious. "Shoot."

"Your father thought it would be good for me to come. Tomorrow is James' death anniversary. I came to see his grave and say goodbye to him in a better state of mind."

Matt takes my hand in his. "I can't imagine how hard it must be for you to be here in the city where you learned he died. Kate, I'm so sorry for assuming the worst about you. You never deserved that. Thank you for putting me in my place."

I smile. "Thanks Matt."

"So, what are you going to do tomorrow?" he asks.

"I'm going to go to his grave tomorrow morning. It's just going to be a quiet and relaxing day tomorrow."

He gently rubs my hand. "Do you need my help tomorrow?"

"Could you drive me there? I know you're probably busy, but it would be nice to have a friend there," I say.

He smiles. "I'm free until two o'clock tomorrow."

"Thank you."

He smiles and hugs me. "No, thank you for trusting me and wanting me there. I know you're not ready to make this more than I friendship, but I'm glad you still want us to be friends."

I look up and smile. "Always."