Song: I'm still here- Sia

"Well she isn't going any farther with it." Dad tells us as we sit around the fire pit two days after we had meet with her and her lawyer. I have been sick the past two days worrying about what if. My parents kept trying to tell me that everything was going to be fine but a part of me kept saying it was only going to get worse.

"So what changed her mind?" My mom asked my dad.

"I don't know...she just did. I guess she thought she needs to leave it alone and not draw more attention about it."

"Well that's a relief," says Carter.

I attempt to smile back. I should be happy about it. I should but I feel like I ruined her life. She will never be able to wake up to her husband. The kids will never have their father to look up too...not that I would want to wake up beside him or even look up too but he was a part of their lives. She knows now that her husband was really a monster in disguise and her life with him was basically a lie.

"Hey...you should be excited she doesn't want to push any farther," Carter says.

"I guess." I look over at me dad. "Where are the copies of my journal?"

"In my briefcase why?"

"Can I have them, please?"

He gets up and retrieves them and hands them to me. "Coralie, I know you didn't want anyone to read them...I'm sorry but it was the only way that the judge was going to believe it."

"Is this it...are there any more copies?"

"That's it; I only made the one cope."

"Good!" I stand up and walk over to the fire pit and toss them in watching the pages spark with fire and turn black.

"You sure you wanted to do that?"

"Kinda late now...and yes I did. Those were my words, my thoughts, my nightmares for me to see...not you...not mom...not anyone."

"I know we should have never..."

"Forget it...it's too late to be apologizing. You two will never see me the way you use to see me. I am not and will never be that perfect little girl you thought you had."

"Sweetheart you don't..."

I cut him off, "Please dad...just don't...stop already..." I hold my hand up in front of him. "Is all this over now?"

"Yes...why?"

"What about the pictures?" I ask about them because I know that he has them somewhere.

"I don't have any?"

"She said she seen all the pictures. I know if she seen them you did and I'm not stupid. I know you have them for evidence...so don't lie to me."

He takes a deep breath. "No one said you were stupid and first of all that's a different case. He should never had taken any pictures of you."

"But he did; can I see them?"

"I don't think that is a good idea."

"I really don't care what you think. I want to see them." I hold my hand out and wait.

He stands up and walks into the house and then comes back out with a yellow envelope, handing them to me.

"What about the computer? Did you save them to a drive or something?"

"The drive is in the envelop as well. Coralie you don't need to look at them."

I hold it up. "Is this it...does anyone else have copies?"

"All files have been erased from the internet...all evidence was taken away from Tyler. If anyone has anything there is nothing we can do but this is all what we know of....everything is in that envelope."

"Good! I want you to know that these pictures might have looked like me but they were not really me."

"I know...sweetheart...we all know."

It only takes a half of a second to toss them into the flames. There is no reason for me to even look at them. I don't want to see them and now hopefully no one will ever see them again...including Zayden.

"Do you feel better now?" He sounds a little pissed off. "Do you have any idea what you just did...that's the only evidence we had on him."

"I don't care; I just want to forget any of that ever happened."

"Well ok then..." He goes into the house and my mom follows after him. Carter sits and just looks at me like he can't believe I just did that.

"What?" I glare at him.

"First of all, I took care of Tyler. He had a shit load of pictures. Not just of you but a lot of girls he was screwing over."

I shake my head no as my eyes cast towards the floor and then back up at him. "You should never have seen those."

"Believe me...I didn't plan too."

"Well I'm sorry that you did."

"Me too." He scoots to the edge of his chair and looks at me. "Can I ask you something?"

"I guess so."

"What does Harley have on you?"

I think about it for a few minutes as I bite the inside of my cheek. "What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb with me. He kept hooking you up...what did he have on you?"

I turn to look away from him to avoid his eyes. I am so afraid that he will be so disappointment in me. "Carter...don't worry about it."

"Seriously, you are my sister. I know he knows something or he has something on you but he refuses to tell me."

"Well maybe...he doesn't have anything."

"I'm not stupid!" He gets a little defensive. "I know you hooked up with him; does he have pictures too?"

I look away again hoping that if I close my eyes that I won't start crying and this is all not really happening. Why can't he just let it all go?

"Coralie, you want the past to disappear like it never happened...if he has something don't you think he will eventually use it against you?"

"Like I will ever see him again; hell we live miles away from that town."

"Fine...whatever." He stands up to go into the house.

I feel my eyes swell up with tears as I yell at him. "FINE! You want to know...YES!...yes...ok...yes he gave me drugs when I needed them. I asked for them. I had sex with him a few times and yes he may have a few pictures because if I ever talked about it he was going to blackmail me...is that what you want to hear? Yes...I fucked up...I always do...why in the hell am I sitting here explaining shit to you?"

He doesn't say anything but his eyes go wide as he stares behind me. I'm sure my parents just heard all of that. I'm sure a part of him wanted them to know about Harley. I turn around to face them...yes my dad is standing there with a look on his face but what scared me more was that Zayden was standing right beside my dad and the look on his face was heartbreaking. I know they heard it all...because I was practically yelling at Carter.