It happened so quickly. It was out of my control. At first, I just thought I'd peed myself. I was dancing around the kitchen, predictably, in my night-time gown while Jason was taking a shower. I rubbed my heavily pregnant belly while I skipped around the kitchen with the radio blasting. I was singing along, happy and content. I was in the middle of pouring myself a tea, when I felt a strange sensation occur down there. I held my bladder for a moment because I was convinced I was just peeing myself, it sometimes happened.

But it didn't stop.

The sack of water hit the floor in a giant bubble, splashing across the glossy tiles. And I held my stomach as a sting kicked in. 

"Oh," I gasped, staring at the water. "Jason!"

I waddled through the house, trying to run, but that just made it worse. My hand found the bottom of the staircase and I screamed up the stairs.

"Jason!"

"What!"

"My water's broke!"

"There's still hot water, I haven't used it all!" he yelled back, having completely misheard me.

"My water has broke!" I tried again.

"The water's cold?" he yelled. "It's hot up here."

Oh for God sake.

"Get down here!"

"I can't hear you, talk to me later!"

My voice came out the loudest I had ever screamed. "Jason Tucker, get your fucking backside down these stairs now!"

That got his attention, I heard the shower turn off and Jason emerged at the top of the landing with a towel wrapped around his waist. 

"What is it?"

I leaned across the barrister, taking breaths. "They're coming."

"They're coming?" he screeched. "Like, right now?"

"Do you want me to draw you a damn picture? They're coming!"

"Okay, okay," he paced up and down the landing frantically with his hands on his head. "Okay."

"I'm sorry for yelling." I said. 

He kept pacing, unsure which door to go in. 

"Jason!"

He paused, staring at me. "What do I do?"

"Hospital bag. Phone. Car keys. And for goodness sake, put some clothes on."

"In that order?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes, turning to waddle to the lounge. "Oh my God, I need my mother."

"Two minutes," he shouted, repeating my list over and over again.

I laughed to myself, placing myself on my couch. I rubbed my head, bracing myself for what's coming. I had read all the books, been to all the classes, had full-blown details thrown at me from complete strangers that almost made me want to punch Jason in the face for ever having sex with me. I knew it was going to be messy, awkward, painful and unexpected, but it's not for nothing. It's to have our beautiful babies, our family. It would make us complete - whole. It would make us plunge into a surprise adventure together.

Jason appeared a few minutes later, fully clothed, with the hospital bag hanging from his fingertips. "Okay, I'm set. Are you ready? Oh, shit, I forgot to get you underwear."

"I'm not going to need underwear." I stared at him.

"Oh, right," he gulped. "Hair brush? Pajamas?"

"Get. The. Car. Keys."

"On it."

A few seconds later, he returned with the car keys and he helped me to my feet, almost pushing me through the door. 

As he locked the house and we moved toward his car, I felt the first contraction. It was bearable, like a period pain, it wasn't too bad, but it made me pause at the car, leaning over while I clenched my teeth together. 

It lasted around a minute, replaced with a light, bouncy twitch. Jason waited patiently, then held the car door open, moving me inside it. I was breathlessly panting, just wanting this to all be over before it had even begun.

It was going to be a long night.

+ + +

Two hours later, and I was crying with my back pressed against the wall of the hospital room. My midwife kept on coming in every twenty minutes to check my progress, but there wasn't any damn progress. I wasn't ready yet, I had to endure the pain for what could be hours and hours. And the pain, was unlike anything I could describe. It was equivalent to having a years worth of period pain at one time, and that was just an hour ago, when the full force hadn't hit. I was now at the point where if I wasn't in labor, I would have mistaken it for dying. Worse than dying. Worse than anything. Anything.

Jason was sat in a chair next to the bed, he kept rolling his head back with his mouth open, and I wasn't having that.

"Hello!" I yelled at him for the hundredth time, he snapped his eyes open. "If I have to stay awake through this then you sure as hell have to."

"You're such a wuss," he said. "Try get hitting by a car."

"Don't," I pointed my finger at him, just as another contraction hit. "Don't go there."

I placed my hand against the wall, holding my hip as I tried to hold in a scream. I couldn't do it, I let it out. A deafening squeal emerged from my lips and it lasted a long time. When it was finally over and I was back to just regular, excruciating pain, I turned to see a male doctor standing at the door with a clipboard.

"Finally," I gasped. "Give me drugs. I need drugs. I'll take anything, including anesthetic. Just knock me out."

"Please knock her out." Jason mumbled. 

I glared at him and he swallowed fearfully.

The doctor glanced down at his clipboard. "It states in your birth plan that you requested a drug-free labor."

"I don't care," I screeched. "Throw that away. I'm re-writing it."

"I'm afraid all we have available is gas and air."

"We're in a hospital!" I yelled at him. I didn't know why I was yelling, I didn't want to. I started crying afterward. "I need drugs. One of those. . . epidural things."

"I'm sorry," he said. "But an epidural has to be administrated by an anesthetist, and we currently don't have one on shift."

"Then call one!"

"Gas and air is an extremely effective pain relief and will-"

I turned side ways in anger. "Jason, get him out of here before I punch him."

"She doesn't mean that." Jason said for me, getting to his feet. 

"It's okay," the doctor said. "As you can imagine, I hear it a lot."

"She'll take gas and air, thank you."

I watched as Jason patted his shoulder and the doctor nodded, exiting the room. I felt so guilty for the way I had spoken to him, but I couldn't help it. I was turning into a completely different person because of the pain.

Jason widened his eyes at me. "Remind me to never knock you up again."

"Gladly." I laughed. "You're getting a vasectomy."

"Seriously, I'm fine with that."

"Good."

"Good."

"Great."

"Great."

I met his eyes and he smiled at me, I smiled back, just for a second, then I randomly burst out into more tears. 

It was going to be a very long night.