I S L A

"Well this is an extraordinary way to spend my birthday," I say. "Having coffee with the man that I harassed."

Jason cups his large hands around his hot chocolate, meeting my eyes shyly. "Lily didn't like coffee."

I have different taste buds.

"Oh," I say. "What did she like?"

"Tea," he says. "Or hot chocolate. Isla, I need to ask you something."

I gulp. "Okay."

"You knew things," he says quietly. "Things that no one else could know. I need to know if, you've. . ." He backs out, laughing on the words. "Never mind. It's stupid."

"Spoken to her?" I finish for him. 

He flicks his eyes up, the gleaming hazel crushes me. "Yeah."

Ah, God. Now it's awkward. I don't know what the hell to say to him. Do I lie? Is it better if I lie? Would that give me a better chance of getting close to him again? Me being a clairvoyant is something that my 'parents' considered, as a last option, because the reality, the truth, was too damn ridiculous for them to comprehend. It was too ridiculous for Jason to believe, for anyone. It's just not a reasonable justification. Pretending I'm a clairvoyant might be the only way.

"She spoke to me for a while," I say. "I was four, I was confused. I saw her all the time, she wanted me to help you, to deliver messages, to tell Jamie things. But, I wasn't developed enough to understand. It sent me crazy, to the point that I believed I was her. I think she realized this and after you kicked me out of the house eight years ago, she stopped talking to me. It wasn't just her, there were other voices and faces too, but she was the strongest. She was unique, loud, she fought to be heard. Maybe she's crossed over now."

"Crossed over?"

"Yeah, you know, to the beyond," I look away, staring around the diner in numbness. "Her time here is over."

"I believe you," he says.

I snap my eyes back. "What?"

"I believe that you can contact the dead. It's the only explanation, right? I'm sorry that I was hard on you. It all makes sense now. Well, kind of. Once I get my head around the fact she was a sort of. . . ghost."

"Ghost," I nod, trembling on the word. "Right."

"If you tried, could you speak to her again?"

I stiffen, it takes me a while to answer that, because whatever answer I give might change what ever he meant by asking that question. Is he curious? Or does he want me to try and contact her? That could work. Somehow. 

"I haven't in a long time," I say. "But, there's always a chance."

"Are you free to do it today?"

I open my mouth to speak but I close it.

"Sorry," he shakes his head. "It's your birthday and you probably have plans. Just ignore me."

"No," I say. "Today is fine. I don't have any plans until tonight. But, shouldn't you be with Jamie?"

"It'll only be a couple of hours," he says. "Honestly, they probably haven't even realized I'm gone. They're too busy catching up."

I frown at that. "Okay. If you're sure."

"Absolutely," he says, he gulps down his hot chocolate then widens his eyes while licking his lips. "Ready?"

Oh, okay. So, it's happening right now? I nod in a panic, drinking some more of my coffee before rising from my seat. He seems determined to do this, one hundred percent committed, like he believes it entirely. If he believes in something like this, then why couldn't he just believe in the truth? 

To believe in clairvoyance you have to accept a little bit of magic into your heart. You have to open your mind, to things that can't be explained by science or rationality. But I get the feeling there will always be an enormous difference between clairvoyance and reincarnation, something that someone like Jason could never believe, no matter how many times I convinced him. 

I can't make him fall in love with Isla. I can't make him fall in love in eleven days, but what I can do, is bring back the love he had for Lily. And take it from there.

Someone like me, a twenty-year-old woman with no real experiences except speaking to therapists, isn't what he needs. He needs her, he still needs her.

So I'll give her back to him.