Me: Hey God.
God: Hey how is your last day before break going!?
Me: Not good I just started getting ready and I already want to stay home.
God: Why that's not like you?
Me: ..You know the answer.
God: Yeah but just because I can read your mind and heart doesn't mean I do. I want an open relationship with you.
Me: It's Grandma
God: Here we go
Me: She doesn't get that I need to stop letting time hold me back. I need to do the small things that I can do. I need to try to do more but she has made it so that I can never do anything! If I don't do something she tells me to  and if I do it before then it becomes a problem and I blow up .
God: You know how dangerous it is to have this nature. You have to fix it or you will end up hurting ones you love the most.
Me: I know.... but I don't know how
God: Remember, My love is patient and kind. Not the kind of the weak in the knees passion type of love, that isn't unconditional love but infatuation. The love I offer is  knowledge of somebody's faults and still accepting them for who they are while still working with them to become better. For the both of you love is something that goes beyond a childish crush at school, this is REAL unconditional love doing anything for somebody most importantly guiding them to my throne in Heaven! Exhibiting the light of Christ at all times, not just when it's convenient for you, not just when it's going to make you feel good is the greatest example of love humans can give! Especially when your life's on the line and all you want to do is scream, that's when you come to me and sit with me, let the saints words become a part of yours to renew the passion that you have for me and that they still have up in heaven. Now you need to be able to know Someday  you're going to feel like you aren't able to be on this earth anymore, you will feel lost but remember contentment is to pour out love on the people around you.
Me: if I don't forget what I'm supposed to be running to.
God: That it's difficult for me to even hear, I know you struggle because of the pain that you feel or because of everything that's been eating you up inside for years, but fear not, I know you don't know how to deal with these things on your own but that's why you need come to me and that's where your sorrows the closer you come to  me in your life even if  you know me there's still more that you could know about a person especially about the being that created all. Stick it out with me kid! Even when it doesn't feel like it's worth anything because in the end it will be. If you follow diligently you will be a better person for it and I will not hold anything against you, because I know you try your best, you try to be the best version of yourself that you can be and that's all I want from you. Even if people bother you. You need to remember that no one's opinion matters except for mine, through this process you may scream and cry but just remember these things will not be a problem forever.
Me: I'll keep trying..... Love is patient love is kind