"I am a Racistus," Trump announced proudly.

"That's a thing?" I gave him an incredulous look.

"Of course we are a thing!" Trump snorted.

"If you're not human, what are you doing in the Human Union? Leading it, even," Armetorius shot Trump a confused glance.

"Well, we Racisti are from the planet Orangia. It is very, very far from both Earth and Lessaenes, so neither of you knew about us. A couple of decades ago, we accidentally discovered you and your Galactic Wars when an Orangian satellite went out of range. However, we couldn't afford to take sides, because we were in the middle of our own crisis," Trump sighed.

"There are two species of Racisti, Racistus Sexistan and Racistus Sneakian. We have been at war since the beginning of time. I am the leader of the Racistus Sexistan, and when we found out about Earth and Lessaenes, I came up with a brilliant plan to defeat the Sneakian once and for all!" Trump stuck his index finger into the air victoriously.

"First, I would come to the Human Union disguised as a human, and then, I would use my radical ideas to win the Human Presidential election. Finally, I'd defeat Lessaenes in the Galactic Wars, and use the combined strength of Earth and Lessaenes to make Orangia great again by putting the Sneakian in their place!"

"Well, then..." I trailed off. I knew he wasn't human, but I was expecting him to be a Rhenan or something. I would've never seen this coming.

"Ah, I have found you at last, you filthy Sexistan!" I heard an victorious exclamation from behind me. Turning around, I saw a woman who looked somewhat like Trump, but not as hideous.

"Hillary Clinton, leader of the Sneakian," Trump snarled. "How clever of you to follow me here, to meet your doom! I have the mighty Lessaenite Empire on my side! You and your puny species can never defeat me now!"

"Wait, who said anything about us being on your side?" I raised an eyebrow.

"That's right, Donald Trump, leader of the Sexistan," Clinton sighed. "I don't think it's that easy to get her to side with you," she gestured to me.

"I don't care if we don't have the support of the Lessaenites, we'll defeat you anyway!"

"And how do you plan to do that?" She sighed.

"By...building walls!" Trump bellowed. "And being our awesome, extremely good looking selves!"

"Why do we have to fight anyway?" Another Racistus stepped out from behind Hillary Clinton. "Why can't we just share the planet?"

"I see you've brought along your socialist colleague, Bernie Sanders," Trump sneered. "And, to answer his question, only one of us can rule over Orangia, and it has to be me!"

"What are all these Racisti doing on my ship!?" I fumed, very annoyed.

"We're arguing, of course," Trump shrugged, as if it were an everyday thing. "It's what we Racisti do."

"Well, argue somewhere else!" Armetorius snapped.

"Wait," I put up my hand. "I have a solution for you. Why don't you split the planet in half?"

"See!?" Bernie Sanders grinned triumphantly. "Even the Queen of Lessaenes likes my idea!"

"Hm..." Hillary Clinton mused. "I guess that would be better for everyone."

"No!" Trump yelled. "I won't have it! I must rule over all of Orangia!"

"But, what if you separated the two halves of your planet...with a wall?" I suggested.

"Wall? Did you say WALL!?" Trump's face immediately lit up. "Oh, yes! That's a great idea! I shall build a wall to separate my great people from the Sneakian, and the Sneakian will pay for that wall! Let's make Orangia great again!"

#MakeOrangiaGreatAgain

THE END

A/N: Well, that was The Galactic Wars: Trump Edition. I bet you weren't expecting me to include some of the other candidates too *winks*. Anyway, I should probably get to work on the next chapter of The Ice Queen of Lessaenes. Goodbye, lovely readers!

<3 Saralee