SETH

I still get nightmares about it.

On Labor Day, the day of Ravenwood Academy's 'Annual Wolf Run', what was supposed to be a cool event turned into a nightmare. Upon our return, we were attacked by rogues who wanted to capture us Omegas.

I was in wolf form, like the rest of the students, waiting for my turn to re-enter the academy property, when I was taken forcibly by a rogue who apparently wanted to capture me for some reason I am not so sure.

I mean, I know what they want with Omegas like me, but it's too terrifying to even think about. *sweats with terror*

I wasn't the only Omega they captured; there were three of us, but fortunately, the school authorities saved us with the assistance of the Alpha students, like my brother.

It was a very traumatic experience for me, one I am fully healed from physically, but not mentally. I mean, I am doing okay. I will not let fear dominate my life, but I still get nightmares about that fateful day.

Now, speaking of bad dreams, I wish I could wake up from the horrible sensation of feeling like there's nobody left for me at Ravenwood.

The only boy here who did not treat me like a commodity was Sean, the Alpha from England. Unfortunately, he was expelled from this academy once my father uncovered his arrest report for allegedly possessing an illegal substance that is no longer illegal in the US. At least, I don't think so. It isn't in my home state and not here in Colorado either.

Sean was wonderful to me. A true English gentleman who saw me for who I was and not what I could bring to his pack. You are sorely missed, my handsome knight.

Now all my options are sycophants who just want me for my money and last name. After these few weeks that I had front row seats to watch my brother's infatuation for Jake somehow grow into a full blown passion, I have come to crave what Skylar found in my roommate - a love with no hidden agenda.

Technically, Skylar did not find love because Jake doesn't love him. He loves Jayden. But the point is that if he were to love my brother, he would do so not because he is a Stronghold but because of who he is inside.

At first, it was ludicrous to think that Skylar could ever find ANYONE here in Ravenwood who would fall in love with him for who he is despite his famous last name.

Come on, this is Ravenwood Academy, a place famous for political matches and people marrying for money or power. In our case, we have both. None of us came to this prestigious place deluded; we knew from the start why we came here, and that would have been fine by me.

Beauty fades but a contract keeps us bound for eternity - or at least the ten year minimum guaranteed. It is what my parents had and it would suffice for my brother and me as well. But then Skylar had to have that famous epiphany of his and look for someone who would love him for who he was inside and not what he could bring to the table.

Like many boys before him, he wanted what the other one had - his roommate, who actually had found a love like this - a pure, untarnished love that would sustain them through the ages, like those older married couples who stay married for 25 or 50 years.

It is a beautiful sentiment and a lovely hope, but one would sooner win the lottery than a love like that, like what mated couples used to have back in the good old days when werewolves were paired by a deity so powerful that they remained together until death did them part.

My paternal grandparents - much like Jake's maternal grandparents - are still together to this very day for more than forty years. They are very much alive and present in our community back in Texas. Grandpa is Chairman of the Board of Stronghold Oil and of the Board of the Wolf Council in my pack. My grandmother is a volunteer in several charities that she started when she was the Luna of our pack before my mother, who now follows in her footsteps.

But the reality is there are no more mates, what Skylar has is a pipe dream, but it infected my way of thinking and now there is nobody here left for me that would meet this specific criteria. Not a single Alpha who courted me before was interested in getting to know the real me.

I know Kyle wants me because he wants the bragging rights to be able to say he bagged himself a Stronghold. I am not naive to think he is after me for my looks. Ironically, I'd take a vain Alpha who is enamored with me for my beauty other than my checkbook. I am kidding, of course, I do not use checkbooks. We have people that pay our bills.

You see, this is the spot that I find myself in. Hopeless and aimless, having to settle for the least worst candidate that I can find among the LGBT Alphas. Yes, because I also cannot look at a Beta or Gamma. They are too low ranked for an Omega like me.

Scoff. An Omega like me. Who the hell even says stuff like that? I am just like any other Omega that walked this Earth, searching for a partner that would stay with him to care for the pups that I will undoubtedly have because we are the most fertile species among the living, breathing creatures.

You know what?

I hate to agree with my brother - or my roommate - in this instance, but there is one among the pupils here that I would love to prospect. One Alpha who is not only handsome, strong, and perfect for me, comes from an impeccable pedigree and is heir to one of the most powerful packs in the South. *sighs*

Of course, I have a huge crush on Jayden! Just look at him! I dare you to find any flaws in this perfect specimen of a werewolf. He is so darn delicious that I wish I could have him for fifteen minutes in a room, just the two of us.

What you can't have, you cannot resist.

It's funny. It's not like he is the only boy here who is good-looking and comes from a strong pack, we are talking about the cream of the crop here. This is the prestigious Ravenwood Academy. But there is something about Jayden that gets me every single time.

I am NOT a boy who covets their friends' boyfriends, usually I pretend to agree with their taste in men while secretly throwing up at their choices. However, as soon as I first laid eyes on Jayden on that fateful first day of school in our locker room, I was spellbound by him.

He is not just the hottest boy I've ever seen in my life so far, there is a confidence to him that though he could act like any other privileged Alpha, he doesn't. He is confident without being a jerk about it. He carries himself with a poise, a command of presence that lets us know immediately that we stand before an Alpha - my father, mother, and brother have the same ability.

I like that he doesn't care that Jake is poor and comes from a small pack. In fact, he never wavered when he found out about my roommate's humble origins. Jayden is just that kind of a guy, he cared about Jake, not what his family or pack could bring to the table.

Of course, that only means that the opposite would also be true. He would not care that I am a Stronghold or rich, no. He would love me for who I am inside. Alas! That was not meant to be. Nevertheless, I can not help but pine over him like a lost puppy.

When Jake called me out the other day, telling me I wanted Jay for myself, I did not have the heart to deny him. I wholeheartedly do want him for myself, I cannot lie. But I am not delusional, I know he is in love with Jake.

The heart wants what it wants. I cannot change that any more than someone can make me want Jayden any less. I would love to get my hands on those muscles and...

Eh hum, excuse me, I got carried away for a moment. Yes, Jayden is the one for me but unfortunately, that will not do. I can't make him love me any more than my brother can do the same to Jake, though in their case who knows what kind of feelings he has for Sky...

I will say that he was mighty tempted when I invited him to come with us to Texas for the weekend. Next week, we won't have any classes because of the Thanksgiving break.

*flashback*

Last Saturday, we were in Texas for the weekend. My father kept grilling us about what plans we had now that both of us could, potentially, be without any prospects. I know I already don't have any since Sean departed. Skylar could be as well once Jayden gets approved by Jake's mother.

Later that night, my brother stopped by my suite for a talk when he thanked me for my support in talking to Jake about him, but he also told me that he didn't want me to possibly lose a friend over this.

"I mean it. You don't need to push Jake towards accepting me. Whatever will be will be. I would never be able to live with myself if you lost a good friend just because he decided to prospect Jay. Promise me, okay?" He insisted until I promised him that I wouldn't push it anymore.

"I love that you care about my happiness, so thank you. I love you, little brother." He kissed me on the forehead and left my suite. I do love my twin brother with all my heart, so of course I get emotional when his happiness is concerned.

If this was about a silly conquest, I would be all over him to back off, but we are way past that now. He actually does love Jake, which is kind of endearing because I don't think he has ever been in love. Not to say that he never told girls in the past that he was.

Trust me, not like this he wasn't. I know my brother better than anybody else and he never cared about anyone in the same way he cares about Jake. Not ever.

*end of flashback*

It's Thursday morning here in Colorado.

As the students prepare for the penultimate day before the break, the cafeteria is buzzing with excitement about the time away from Ravenwood and the prospective couples who will undoubtedly try to lock in that much buzzed about parental approval for contract negotiations.

By now, Headmaster Lockwood has already announced all the couples cleared after last weekend and soon there will be more for him to announce. Just not the Stronghold name because neither of us is anywhere near that phase. Oh well...

"Have you given any more thought about my invitation?" I asked my roommate, who last night, I invited to come to Texas with me. He was supposed to go to Georgia with Jayden, but he was suspended for two weeks for attacking Skylar in the cafeteria on Tuesday.

I am not going to lie, I miss his scent when he is not near me. I mean, near enough to smell his intoxicating scent. He also has the most beautiful smile I've ever seen. *swoons*

"Can I sleep in your room?" He surprised me with a question I was definitely not expecting to hear.

"In a house with five suites? Why? Not that I have the least problem with that." I was intrigued by his reaction.

"I don't trust myself to sleep alone in that mansion." He admitted, getting flustered.

"For the last time, my brother would never attack you. I am sorry that he entered your suite uninvited last time, but I swear on my life he would never actually do anything to you. He is NOT that person." I declared, rather peeved. I know there are several types of boys out there who like to take some liberties without consent, but my brother is NOT like that.

"Calm down, Seth. I have already slept two nights with your brother alone in a room. I know how he behaves, it's not about that, okay? It's a simple question, can I or not?" He reminded me of the weekend they spent together in his condo in Boulder.

I really need to go there as well. I hope we can do that in December, during the Winter Break from Ravenwood.

"Yes, of course you can." I replied, pensive. He smiled at me.

I ate in silence for a few minutes when it hit me.

"Wait, you are not worried about what he can do to you. You're scared that if you stay in a room alone with him, you won't be able to control yourself..." I teased him with a naughty grin.

Jake glared daggers at me for that proposition. Yeah, he was not amused.

"I changed my mind, I will stay in the guest bedroom I did last time." He sulked, annoyed at me.

"You know I was just teasing you, of course you can bunk with me. It would be my pleasure." I assured him in a playful tone.

Later that morning, I walked aimless during a break from classes when I stumbled upon two boys making out in a secluded corner of the third floor of the first tower. I was like, what? Them? Really?

"We were just having fun, please don't tell anyone you saw us together." The Alpha boy pleaded with me, looking terrified.

"You are free to do what you want here, Kyle. I have no business gossiping about you or passing any judgment. Forget you ever saw me. Continue what you were doing." I told them, not wanting them to feel self conscious. The days of two men kissing and having it be a shocking thing are long gone. At least, within the werewolf community.

I left them to their accord, puzzled as to what Kyle was doing with HIM of all people?

I don't understand, but it's not my place to judge. Last time I checked, neither of them are cheating on anybody. At least, I don't think so.

I am not going to lie, Ravenwood is not the same now that Jayden is no longer here.

What I wouldn't do to have it be us making out in a secluded corner of the academy...

I do not mean that in the sense of cheating on my roommate, of course not. I meant that as if Jake was not in the picture. I am not a cheater, nor would I want to be with a boy who cheats. Because if he does this with someone else, rest assured he would do it to me too.

Take notes, ladies. When a guy says it only happened with you, what he really means is that you are NOT the first and certainly will not be the last. It's the same when a boy says he is only having unprotected sex with you. No, girl. He isn't. He might be now, but you are most certainly NOT the first girl he did that with. Make him do an STI panel. Protect yourself!

It's Friday morning in Colorado.

Last night, Jayden and Jake FaceTimed for hours. I left the room to give them some privacy and took the chance to take a walk around the second tower before taking a long shower. When I returned, Jake was taciturn. I didn't know if I should press on about what happened or if I should respect his privacy.

I am sure that if he wanted, he would have told me about their conversation.

I can honestly say that Jayden would probably not have taken well the fact that Jake decided against the trip to Georgia. But I agree with Jake on this one and not because I am biased, I genuinely think that his mother will not approve of Jayden. Not until he resolves those feelings for my brother, whatever they might be.

He could feel affection for him, considering the campaign my brother is promoting to get Jake. I am sure maybe one of those actions got through to him. Or not, who knows? I have no idea and I will try to stay out of it, if I can.

All I know is this:

Don't ask me to not like Jayden because I cannot. The heart wants what it wants.

https://youtu.be/ij_0p_6qTss

A|N: BOOM?

I have written hundreds of chapters in my short career as an author.

But I never wrote what I is coming next.

It's about to get down!

No, you have no idea what it is! Don't try to guess it!

But if you want, you can subscribe to my PATREON account and find out what it is! Read NOW the SHOCKER that will have ALL the fans gasping for air.

www.patreon.com/LeonardoMontero

Don't say you weren't warned. It's aptly called "Lose My Breath." *panting*

OFF: This song title is a good theme throughout the book. The heart has a mind of its own or so it seems some times. O.o

Love,

Léo.