Proud Lesbian

I had a relationship.....

She was/is (I'm not so sure, if we are together until now) my first and probably my last.

Somebody had her first

....YES....

She has a relationship that time when we're also together.

They have Long distance relationship that is why her attention was diverted to me.

Everything was fine even if her boyfriend is home

(They are neighbor and work in other places his boyfriend)

because all the situation between us is a game

and her boyfriend thought we are bestfriends

that is why I'm always her side.

The tension between us is complicated.

I love her, she loves me and she wants to break up to her boyfriend but she was scared.

We graduated and situation is the same until we all have work.

We both the same working fields.

So everyday seeing each other and also her boyfriend.

I'm so happy waiting for the day that they broke up.

I feel that she loves me but the had things and circumtances

that we didn't hold on, if the future will dictates all.

I'm the one who walked on the stage(graduation) first before her but

she graduated after summer class but she waiting to walked on stage.

I like to see him walk on stage but she didn't like it

because she know that her ex boyfriend will coming and her parents doesn't know that they broke up.

I force her to attend and I also there because I'm her bestfriend

but in my mind I had a little sacred

that once they see each other and to there parents

it will probably go back on a relationship.

And YES they are couples again

...... I am so hurt.....

.......Super hurt.....

sacrifice all sacrifice I have things to do

because it is really hurt if I leave to her side.

It is like drugs to me because I cared a lot to her (You knows the feeling??)

the feeling of she has a part in your heart and it really hurt if you cut it off

....You know....

Until we go back to our work and her boyfriend was there too

... FVck!....

I had no choice....

It is wrong in the first place we are together but if the challenge was like hell it is like the same if you let go.

It hurts but I overcome to it because her boyfriend is going other places.....

Stupid if it is stupid but I love her very much and she also love me too.

She said it's like living on a jail because it's impossible if we're together

....I'm Girl...YES I'm a Girl....

And she is my girlfriend...

Even if she is not mine all....

It's OK for me I'm her bestfriend....

I like girl even though she still pushing me to find a Man or boyfriend

so that we all OK......

But it is really hard to love a MAN!
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