"You're Ben Solo."

-

Kylo freezes in his tracks. It's as if he's in a trance; he might've even stopped breathing.

He doesn't speak a word throughout the rest of the trip home. He barely looks at me.

I make small talk with a couple of troopers nearby, ignoring the looks I'm probably getting from Phasma. You know, if I could actually see her face.

As soon as our ship lands on the Finalizer, Kylo storms off, not bothering to see if I follow.

Of course I follow.

I run after him, trying to keep up with his brisk, angry pace. I don't understand why he's so upset with me?

"Kylo, slow down!" I call. He glances over his shoulder and slows down only barely.

I make it beside him, finally. He seems to be headed for his room.

"I had a recent lung injury, you know?" I rattle in a few heavy breaths.

"No, I didn't." He answers in his deep, masked voice.

"It seems that you've forgotten that I asked you to decline that mission." He grumbles.

"What kind of pilot would I be if I cowered at the sign of danger?" I shake my head, "I have no idea why it bothers you so much."

He stops in the middle of the hallway and faces me.

"I want you to be safe." He states firmly.

"But why?" I push. He doesn't say a word, his shoulders tensing and his fists clench.

"I would suggest you give me a few minutes alone to settle down before I hurt you." He demands quietly.

"I think I can trust you, Kylo." The words slip out of my lips.

I think of every time he's broken a promise and try to blink the thoughts away. I can trust him, can't I?

"You can trust me." He answers my thoughts.

"Yeah, you say as you answer my thoughts. You've promised me you wouldn't do that, Ky." I furrow my eyebrows. He groans, grabbing my forearm and dragging me into his bedroom.

"What was that for?" I whine, rubbing the spot where he'd squeezed my arm.

He throws his mask from his head, running his hands through his curls in complete frustration.

"You looked s-so, uh, and I-" I approach him, silencing his awkward stuttering with a sweet kiss, my arms around his neck. He places his hands on my sides and responds to my kiss eagerly and desperately, rocking the pair of us side to side.

He lets his forehead rest on mine as we break for air.

"I know you want to trust me." He admits, looking into my eyes.

"Take off that stupid eye bandage. I want to see both of your eyes." I say, not sure how to answer his statement. He does as I ask, pulling away so he can peel it from his face.

I find his blind eye almost more beautiful than his other; perfectly imperfect. I put my hands on his cheeks and stand on my tip-toes, gently placing a kiss on his scar.

He sits down on his bed; I find a spot beside him.

"I want to trust you too. But-"

"But?"

"But, if I'm going to trust you, there are things that you need to tell me." I finish.

He knows exactly what I'm asking for, and he places his hand on his face. He's surely thinking of what to say next; how to respond.

"Tonight, you can ask me anything you'd like, and I'm not aloud to refuse you." He decides. I feel my cheeks heat up in surprise, knowing this is a lot for him. He's the most closed, secretive person I've ever met, and he's willing to open up to me; if only for one night.

"S-so you are Ben Solo." I say. He slowly, begrudgingly nods. My jaw drops.

"Why did you leave? What about your mother? And your father?" I spew several questions at once, surprising him.

"Well, I wouldn't say they were parents to be proud of." He frowns.

"You never died in the Jedi Temple, then. You were the one who murdered those Padawans." I realize.

My words visibly pain him; he doesn't cry but he seems to grow increasingly emotional. I instantly flock to his side, putting my face on his chest to comfort him.

We sit like that for what seems like hours.

Kylo reminisces his old Jedi friends; he even tells me a story or two of their adventures. I've never felt so trusted and wanted in my whole life.

He holds onto me while he tells the stories of his murdered friends as if I'm a lifeline; as if I'm the only one holding him and keeping him from being ripped apart by his sins, his mistakes.

After some quiet, he gets up from the bed to change from his armor.

"Will you sleep in here?" He sighs.

"Of course." I smile lightly. He walks to his drawers, thinking twice and taking one of his comfy sweaters and a pair of shorts out for me.

As soon as he goes into his bathroom to change, I take most of my clothes away and let the soft sweater slip over my torso. I sigh heavily, immediately falling in love with its softness and the way it smells of him.

I get into bed, leaving plenty of space for him and enjoying the warmth of his blankets. I could never enjoy such comfort in Poe's bed as I was rehabilitated not so long ago.

I watch Kylo's outline as he comes back in the dark. He lays beside me, and it's silent after that.

Well, until I break it, of course.

"Kylo, could I ask you one more question?" My lip trembles with nerves, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to ask him without back out before.

"Anything."

"D-do you love me?"

-

hello everyone!

happy Thursday!

i really hope you enjoyed this chapter!

also, if you hadn't read earlier, I have now posted my new story Covet ; although there are no chapters yet you could check out the intro! Tell me what you think, I hope you love it:))

thank you so so much for being loyal readers, voters, and commenters:))

ily all

kait