Kylo doesn't come to visit me the morning of my mission, so I get dressed slowly and quietly. I don't feel lonely; I'm surrounded by my multitude of thoughts.

I only hope that I'll see him at least once before I leave; I truly hope it's not the last time I see him.

When I'm almost completely covered from head to toe in my black uniform, I stare at my own face in the mirror. Should I do this?

There's no way I can't do this.

Well, actually, there is.

Kylo promised me over and over that he'd pull me from the mission right at my word; I never gave it to him. I made a commitment as a pilot to my unit and to the First Order, and I can't sever it at the first sign of life-threatening danger.

I place my helmet under my arm like a ball and leave my living space. As soon as I step out of the door, I give my room one last, long look, then I'm gone.

I stroll towards the landing pad, a few members of my unit joining me in the hallway.

"Please show up, please show up, please show up." I silently beg him. He might be mad. He begged me to stay and I wouldn't listen.

I get there, and my unit silently copies my actions as I board my TIE Fighter and begin to fix things inside and make sure they're in place.

I step back out, standing on the loading ramp. My unit is ready, as well as the other units. The only thing holding them back is an order for take off.

"You're supposed to have left already." Hux says into my earpiece. I roll my eyes. If he's going to come, it has to be in the next few seconds; I don't want to have to leave without saying goodbye.

"Board. Now." Hux orders angrily.

Then I see him, walking in my direction at a brisk pace, stormtroopers in tow. I hear Hux groan loudly in my ear and hold back a laugh. I speed down the stairs, knowing he's coming for me.

Several pilots leave their stations and surround us just in time for me to meet him with a strong embrace. I bury my face in his chest and sigh, my previous worries being lifted from my shoulders.

We pull away to look at each other; I quickly detach my oxygen tubes and pull off my mask. He glances at the troopers nearby but obviously decides he doesn't care enough as he takes his mask away as well.

I hear collective gasps and surprised whispers around us; they've never seen him without his mask, I realize.

"I would ask you one more time not to go, but I don't think you'll listen." He talks quietly. I nod, biting my lip.

"You know me so well." I laugh awkwardly, earning a tiny, closed-mouth smile.

"Can you promise me something?"

"I can try."

"Come back. Don't... don't leave me." He begs, his eyebrows furrowed. His blind eye is glossy, his other filled with an emotion I can't explain.

"Ky, you know I can't pro-"

"Please, just.. promise it anyway. Even if it's something you can't promise." He interrupts. I study him for a second, thinking.

"I promise." I reassure him, looking into his eyes confidently. I place my head on his chest and let him hold me, paying no mind to Hux's screaming in my ear.

"I have to go." I speak into his shirt quietly, knowing he'll hear me. He kisses the top of my head and loosens his grip so I can pull away. I kiss him one last time, and he pecks my nose like he always does.

"Goodbye." I whisper. I turn away, letting a small tear slip out of my eye. I grab my helmet and go straight to my ship, boarding right away and seeing that everyone else has as well.

I watch as Kylo bares his teeth and clenches his fists angrily. He slams his helmet back on and his hand flies to his lightsaber. He doesn't give me a second glance before he sprints away from the launch pad, surely going to throw a tantrum in peace.

I bite my lip and turn the engine on, finally leaving the ship with Hux's sigh of relief entertaining the background noise.

With my mind clear, I switch into hyperspace.

-

We're in the middle of the battle with the Resistance, and I think I can smell my engine smoking.

Not good. Not good at all.

I've taken down too many X-Wings to count; possibly more than the total of TIE's I took out as a Resistance pilot.

I've lost half of my unit, but I have no time to mourn. Their broken, exploded ships litter the ground, and the piles only grow higher.

As I'm shooting at yet another enemy ship, I see a shot headed right in my direction.

As it hits my wing, I scream.

The ground is coming closer and closer, and my eyes are extremely wide. I have no time to do anything for myself; I'm forced to take what's happening to me.

My ship crashes onto the ground.

My vision blurs, but I surprisingly don't black out.

The glass in front of me is shattered; with a jolt, I realize that there's an extremely large piece embedded in my chest, dangerously close to my lung.

My shirt grows dark, stained with blood, and my breathing thins. I feel like I'm drowning.

I taste blood and feel it trickle from my mouth.

I notice that I don't hear shooting any longer; the world around me is abnormally quiet.

Suddenly, there's yelling. One single voice. One I recognize.

He emerges over top of me, climbing into my ship from the ground. I can't put my finger on who it is; my mask is blurring my vision even more.

I gasp for breath and he takes immediate notice.

He tears my mask away and his jaw drops, his eyes widening.

"Poe?"

-

surprise!!

i updated!!

I seriously can't wait to hear from you guys, this is so fun:))

i adore writing this story, honestly:-)

I'll try to update again ASAP

ily

kait