"We're nearing the vessel. You might want to get yourself ready." Phet calls behind him from the controls, pressing a jumble of buttons.

I open and close my mouth like a fish. The pilot in me wants to scream at him about how unsafe he's driving, or all of the wrong buttons he's pressed.

"I'll have you know, I was trained by some of the best pilots in the galaxy." His tone is sarcastic.

"What're you talking about?" I ask, trying to play dumb. Maybe he hadn't heard what I thought?

"Your thoughts aren't exactly quiet." He remarks. His words remind me of something Kylo had said to me that was very similar and it shuts me up.

I absolutely can't wait to see him again, after 2 months.

I can picture it in my mind. He'd wrap me up in his arms (in private of course, he has to keep up his reputation). I'd breathe in his comfortable, familiar scent and get feel the raven-black curls I adore so much. His brown eyes would widen slightly in surprise that I'd already grown in the abdomen.

"I thought you were getting yourself ready?" Phet practically shouts at me, and I realize in seconds that we're basically inside the Finalizer.

"You're going to get caught!" I say. There's no way he could get out of here. And, if he did, the cannons would surely blow him to bits.

"Well, I was hoping you could get Ben to pull a few strings and let me go if I helped you." He smirks knowingly. He'd known this is how it would turn out all along.

"Why would you want to be captured by the First Order on purpose?" My face contorts and I cross my arms.

"I haven't had any action in my life since Ben's betrayal. Now, come on. It's not actually a big deal." The ship lands in the larger ship with a thud.

I hear the shouts of stormtroopers outside already. Glancing out the window I see them approaching, their guns raised. The familiarity comforts me.

Phet steps out with his hands raised in immediate surrender. I remember the time I'd done the exact same. Things are much different now.

I follow him closely, mirroring his surrendering pose, and hope they would recognize me.

Surely Hux would?

"And who might you be?" A familiar snotty, menacing Coruscanti accent asks accusingly and I grin. Speak of the devil.

"Huxy!" I greet, using his resented nickname. His poisonous gaze flits over to me and he's unable to mask his surprise.

"I thought Ren said he'd ridden of y- ah, never mind that." He shakes his head. To my astonishment, he plasters on a fake smile.

"I'll make sure to notify Lord Ren of your arrival. Welcome back. And, as for your friend." He glances uneasily at Phet. I raise my eyebrows at Hux, and following a long bout of silence, he turns on his heel, grumbling under his breath. His trooper lackeys follow at his feet, and the pair of us are left alone in a room full of people.

"Nice job, partner." The boy beside me claps my back, his cute smile and crinkled brown eyes evident. I contagiously smile back and shake my head.

"Partner?" I tease.

"We're partners in crime... was I the only one who got that vibe?" His signature smirk has made a reappearance, and I quickly roll my eyes.

Phet noticeably glances over my shoulder and I finally recognize that heavy clank of his boots on the hard floor, followed by a few trooper-security guards.

My heart beats harder and, with my lip wobbling, I slowly turn around, ready to see him for the first time in so many months.

And I do. Almost.

His blasted mask is covering his face, making it impossible to read his expression, but it's him. He's there.

"Leave us." His authoritative, modified voice orders the troopers as soon as he'd stopped in front of me. The troopers look from side to side at each other and shrug before disappearing, not wanting to get on their master's bad side.

"It's you. Really, really you." I whisper, my fingers twitching with the desperate want to touch his face. Something holds me back. Well, besides the mask.

"You've returned." He answers shortly, pointedly looking at Phet, who I'd briefly forgotten was there. Oops.

There's no doubt that Kylo recognizes his former Padawan classmate, but there's no telling of his reaction to seeing him again.

"I have.. is there any way I could um, talk to you?" I frown, feeling like I'm in the dark. Exchanges between the two of us were never awkward. With him, I'd never felt out of place.

Well, until now.

"...yes." He decides. His fingers circle around my bicep like a vice and he begins to practically drag me out of the common area, heading straight for his bedroom. Phet's scrambled footsteps are audible. He couldn't have expected us to leave so soon, I guess.

Kylo mutters something to my friend before slamming the door to his bedroom shut, leaving the two of us alone.

He clicks the switches at the side of his mask and rips it away, dropping it on his bed.

Seeing his face again sends relief pumping through my veins, and I can't help but throw my arms around him, burying my face in his shirt.

He rests his gloved hand on the back of my head and holds me close with his other. Being held by him again is the most wonderful feeling in the whole galaxy.

He pulls away too soon, carefully studying my features with a tiny smile on his face.

"I missed you." I whisper, fully meaning every word.

"I missed you too." He responds, kissing my forehead. He turns around, facing the window that displays the many beautiful, shining stars we pass in the ship.

"Well, now that I'm back, could you get someone to send Phet home with his ship? And, I'll probably need to talk to Hux about taking leave as I'm not currently physically able to perfo-"

"Mali, stop." Kylo interrupts, facing me again. His gaze is intense, and my heart sinks. He only looks like this when he knows what he's saying will make me upset.

"What is it?" I question quietly.

"It's- you can't-" He sighs, pausing to let his words come out clearly.

"You can't be with me. It's interfering with my path to darkness." He reveals, scratching the back of his head. My eyes fill up with tears and I feel an intense pain like I've never felt before.

"You have to be kidding." I say unbelievingly.

"You know full well that I barely kid." He answers.

"W-why are you doing this now? What about the baby? Kylo, I love you!" My body is shaking and I can't rid of the intense feeling of abandonment, and of pain.

He blinks back what could possibly be a tear and looks away.

"Don't cower out of this, Kylo! Please, listen to me!" I shout, tears falling out of my eyes. I feel like an emotional wreck, like I'm almost embarrassing myself. Like a little girl with a silly crush on a boy who doesn't like her back.

"Don't call me a coward." He growls, his fists clenching and unclenching. I take a step back.

"I thought you l-loved me, Kylo. I can't be wrong." I muster. He raises his head, anger draining from his eyes only to be replaced by sorrow. His face softens.

Then, in a snap, all emotion is gone. Vanished. Like it never existed.

"You are." He whispers.

All color drains from my face.

"W-what?"

"You are wrong. I only became close to you to gather information on the Resistance for Supreme Leader Snoke. I knew it'd be easy to get it out of you, from your first interrogation." His voice cracks slightly, but the pain his words bring only grows worse.

"You're lying, Kylo. What about our baby?" I accuse.

"I only care about my path to the Dark Side. Not you, or that child." He spits.

"You're lying." I mutter.

"I don't love you."

"You're LYING!" I scream, tasting salty tears I my mouth. I lean against the door, my palms flat, appalled and taken aback.

"Kylo, you're breaking my heart!" I say, at a last attempt to get him to turn around, to confess that he'd made it all up.

Only silence.

"Kylo-"

"If you leave now, I'll will let you disappear with that filthy has-been boy in your Rebel ship and return to your sister in safety." He offers, slipping his mask back over his dark curls.

The ones I'd never run my fingers through, as I'd wanted to desperately.

I don't utter a single word and do exactly as he'd suggested.

I stare ahead, unfeeling, as Phet bombards me with questions.

I take him around the corner and back to the X-Wing, which rests right where we'd left it.

It's only minutes until we're engaged in flight again, engulfed in silence, leaving Kylo with my heart in his hands.

-

this is gonna be a short a/n bc i need to go to bed

but

what do you think

is kylo being serious or is he just trying to protect her? let me know!

and i've never done this before but i'm going to give one of my most loyal readers a shout out for her amazing kylo fic. make sure to check out kyloner 's Aid because it's absolutely amazing and i love it, so you should too! it really needs love!

and don't forget to check out covet, my other kylo ff!

thank you!

ily all

kait