Jungkook's POV-

The next week was absolute hell.

Even with what a perfect day Sunday was overall, it was completely overshadowed by that awful man.

The pictures that he took that night must have been sold immediately after being taken because by Monday morning, the pictures along with articles about Yoongi and his "assistant turned lover, Jeon Jungkook" were everywhere.

Of course they knew Yoongi's name, but I don't know how they got mine.

The company was able to protect him, releasing legal statements to defend him, but I didn't have any of that.

I was receiving threats wherever I went.

From people I passed on the street to classmates at school, even strangers on the bus on my way to and from school.

People came out of nowhere and everywhere to attack me. It was pushing me to my breaking point.

I got letters from saesangs threatening to kill me for 'tricking' Yoongi into being gay.

People bullying me for being with him saying I wasn't good looking enough for him and asking why he would ever like someone like me.

I even got threats that just simply said I didn't deserve to live and the world would be better without me in it.

Some people even inexplicably got ahold of my phone number so I started getting direct calls and texts with the same horrific messages.

I tried to keep this from Yoongi (as he had enough to worry about) but one day I left my phone on, instead of switching it off as I normally would, after a phone call with my mother and he saw some texts that had come through from numbers I hadn't had a chance to block yet.

He was so indignant at the messages I'd received that he threw the phone as hard as he could at the wall, the device shattering, completely destroying it.

We cried together as he held me, trying to assure me that none of those things are true, but it was such an overwhelming amount of negativity that was being thrown at me all at once.

I was called every derogatory term you can think of by nearly each and every person that reached out or made a comment, save a small handful of people.

It all drove me even further back into the head space I was in after Jin yelled at me.

Back to where I'm questioning my self worth. My very existence.

I stopped going to class, stopped talking to everyone besides Yoongi and occasionally my mother, my whole life outside of the apartment stopped.

The only person I wanted was Yoongi and even with him I didn't want to talk much.

I just wanted to be held and told that I was loved.

That someone did want me in their world.

That someone cares for me and that I should exist because I didn't feel like it. I didn't feel like I mattered.

Everyone around me had been put through so much trouble because of me. Because I came into Yoongi's life and was the way I am.

Life would be easier if I was straight. I strongly believe that. I hate that I can't just flip a switch and change the way I am.

Fucking hate it.

My friends try to assure me that having me in their lives is no trouble.

That none of this is my fault, but they're just being nice.

All I've been is trouble. I've caused nothing but trouble.

Yoongi took the week off to be with me. He held me and did whatever I needed him to. He was the only thing keeping me here. He was my reason to keep going. To not give up. My reason to exist.

Today we were laying in bed and I asked for a vanilla milkshake with lots of whipped cream.

There was an ice cream shop not far from our building that he was going to go to.

He would only be gone for forty minutes at the most.

A few minutes after he left I heard a knock on the door.

I happened to have been standing in the kitchen when I heard it so I got to the door soon after, opening it to see an oddly shaped envelope on the floor.

I picked it up, hearing the sound of what I recognize as medicine in a bottle, before shutting and locking the door back up.

I took the envelope to the kitchen, staring at it for only a moment before opening it.

I don't know why I felt the need to open it, but I did...

When I get it open the first thing I do is tilt it so the obvious bottle would slide out onto the counter. Once it had come out I picked up the bottle and read the label as terror slowly overcame me.

These are the same pills I took all those years ago.

How would she know about these?

I move my eyes from the bottle,  setting it back down as I look to where the envelope has been placed.

When I had turned the envelope upside down a paper slid out part way out from inside. After picking up the envelope and sliding the rest of the paper out I am able to see it is a handwritten note.

As I look at it more closely I am shocked to see that it looks like my writing.

I shouldn't exist.
I don't deserve to be loved.
I have nothing to offer anyone.

I love you mother and I can't thank you
enough for everything that you've done
and provided for me. I'm sorry to
disappoint you like this.

Taehyung and Jimin, thank you
for loving me when I was unloveable. For always staying by my side.

Hoseok-hyung please take care of Jimin. He deserves to be happy. You both do.

Chanyeol, please be there for Yoongi. This is going to be hard for him. Help him understand that this is for the best. That he deserves to be with someone much better than me.

Namjoon-hyung and Jin-hyung, there was so much left to say. If only we'd had more time to say it.

And Yoongi. My Yoongi, this isn't your fault, it's mine. Everything's my fault. I'm sorry for being such a burden. I hope you find the true happiness you deserve.

-Jungkook

Is this... a suicide note? I didn't write this! I don't understa-

"Oh my God." I gasp.

Tears begin to stream down my face as I start to piece it together. She did this.

She somehow found my weakness and used it against me. She found out about my insecurity with my sexuality and she's using it to get rid of me.

I bet that man at the restaurant, the one that followed us to the river, was one of her people. That she leaked the pictures and my name to the press knowing people would react unkindly.

She pushed me back into a depressive state. Back to a state where I question if life is even worth it, if I'm worth it, but... I have Yoongi. I need him and he needs me.

Yes, this week was awful and I'm upset, but he is with me. He has been with me and everything is better when I'm with him. Even this.

He makes my life worth living. I don't want to kill myself.

And Yoongi, I'm sorry I had to leave.

I read the line from the paper that is still in my hand again with furrowed brows.

Had to leave. Why would I have to?

"I don't want to leave. I want to stay with him." I mumble to myself as I lower the paper back to the counter.

Just as I have placed the paper down on the island I hear a deafening bang come from behind.

Before I can register what is going on or even turn around I feel myself being grabbed and held tightly from behind while a cloth is being held over my nose and mouth.

I try to hold my breath and break myself free but the arms around me are strong and they secure me in my spot until I'm finally forced to gasp for air.

I slip in and out of consciousness as I am carried by strong arms to a room where I hear running water.

I am then laid down rather gently on the floor. The hard surface feeling ice cold under me.

I can't seem to open my eyes fully no matter how hard I try so I can only see limited amounts of my surroundings and I can't seem to speak at all.

I see a man and a woman standing above me. The woman is by what looks to be the bathtub while the man is doing something over on the counter. After a moment of watching him he turns towards me with a small, white cup.

He sets the cup next to me on the floor and pulls me up into a sitting position with one large hand on my back.

He uses his free hand to snap his fingers in front of my face as well as pat each of my cheeks to gain what little attention I have to give.

"Hey. Kid. Can you hear me?"

I nod my head slowly, still completely in a daze.

"I've got some water for you. It'll make your throat feel better."

My throat? Actually, my throat does feel sore. That's probably why I can't talk.

Suddenly the female speaks in a stern tone from my right. "Make sure he drinks all of it."

"You hear that? Drink it all up and you'll feel better." He says gently.

I nod as he brings the cup to my lips. I sip it down but as soon as the liquid hit my tongue I could tell this wasn't just water.

It's very bitter and a bit grainy. Something is in it.

After I empty the cup I am laid back on the ground. I lay there for what feel like hours as I feel my heart slow and my legs and arms start to feel heavy. Then I am lifted up and placed in the tub of warm water.

I can't seem to move my body, but in this moment I don't mind. The floor was so cold and the water feels so nice against my skin.

It's so soothing and comforting. It makes me tired. As my eyes begin to get harder and harder to keep open the women comes into view.

I can't make out her features but she has long, dark hair with equally dark eyes.

I swear I can see her smiling down at me as my eyes close.

My last thoughts before I lose consciousness are muddled with haze and confusion as I slip under the water's surface.

This isn't how my life is supposed to end.

I came to Seoul to have a new beginning. To overcome my fears and let go of my pain.

To fully embrace who I am, enjoying life with Tae and Jimin along with everyone else I've come to befriend and love.

Love... My love.

My heart clenches as memories of us flash through my mind.

He's going to think I broke my promise.

He's going to think he was right to not believe me. That he was right to have doubts. That another person left him alone.

I hope he knows I didn't mean to leave. That I didn't plan for this. That I love him with every ounce of my being.

This isn't how my life is supposed to end.

I pray somehow he finds the truth.

Yoongi's POV-

As I get off the elevator and turn towards Kook's apartment I see that the door is open. I immediately run to the door calling his name.

Nothing.

I rush to the kitchen to set his milkshake on the counter before I run into the living room, "Kook?!"

Silence.

I rush to check his bedroom, "KOOK!"

Still nothing, but then I remember what Jin said about his attempts in the bathtub.

My stomach drops as I silently plead with whatever God there is for him to please be okay.

I turn the corner to the bathroom, "Kook?"

"JUNGKOOK! Oh my God!"

I'm hysterically sobbing as I pull him out of the tub. He is so pale and his lips have adopted a bluish hue.

Once I get him on the ground I lay him flat on his back. I lean my head down to listen for a heartbeat or see if I can feel his chest moving as he breaths but I don't see or hear anything.

I sit back up straight, place my hands in the position I was taught and I begin to do the first set of thirty compressions, after that I open his mouth and do the two breaths.

I hurry and dig my phone out of my pocket to call an ambulance.

As soon as dispatch comes on the line I hurry to tell them what's happened as well as the address and they said they would send someone immediately.

Once the call ends I go back to doing the steps of CPR. I do this four more times but he still isn't breathing.

Tears are streaming down my face as I start to repeat. "You promised. You said 'Where you go I go' was that bullshit? Was that fucking bullshit?! I told you not to make promises you couldn't keep!"

I finish my last set of compressions and go back up to his mouth and do the two breaths before listening for breathing, but I still don't hear him breathing or see his chest moving. And still no heartbeat.

I wrap my arms around him and bring him to my chest.

"Where you go I go... Where you go I go... I love you...Please don't leave," I sob. "You said you wouldn't leave!"

I repeat these things into his ear as I am sitting with my back leaned against the tub, rocking us back and forth.

I decide to lay him down flat again and listen, he is still not breathing so I do one more set of thirty compressions, then move up to do the two breath into his mouths.

Still nothing.

I begin to sob again, "Please don't leave me. I love you. I love you. Don't leave. Plea-" I'm cut off by the most welcomed sound I have ever heard in my life as he starts to cough up water.

I hurry and turn him onto his side so he can spit the water out of his mouth before I pull him back into my lap.

His eyes are cracked open for a moment, just barely long enough to meet mine, before they close again.

I shake his shoulders, "Kook? Kook?!"

I bring my ear by his mouth and I can hear and feel his breath. I bring my hand to his vein on the side of his neck and I can feel a very soft heartbeat.

Then I hear noise coming from the entry (thank God the door was open) and I yell to let them know where we are. The paramedics immediately come in and ask me to step aside so they can get to Kook easier.

They got him hooked up to some portable machines they had and confirmed that he has a pulse but it is faint.

They were asking me question after question about how long he was under water and didn't have oxygen, how long I did CPR for, if he has taken any drugs or had excessive alcohol and I tried my best to answer them, but I couldn't focus on the lady in front of me.

The whole conversation I watched as they did their assessment of him and then moved him onto the gurney to take him to the hospital.

"Can this please be done at the hospital or in the ambulance. I'm going to the hospital with him. Please. Please let me go with him."

They allow me through and I follow them down to the ambulance and to the hospital. I hold Kook's hand the whole way, bringing it to my lips as I place soft kisses on each of his knuckles and the back of his hand.

"You promised, love. Don't leave me." I let out a sob is I rest my head lightly against his leg, "You promised."