it's bored and vaguely sad o'clock

•••

kevin: y'all don't even know about my knife shoes

arnold: ice skates

kevin: blocked.

•••

mckinley: who needs antidepressants?? i'll just listen to hey ya by outkast daily.

narrator: but things were not alright alright alright alright

•••

arnold: are. you okay??

kevin, lying face-down in a walk-in freezer: i'm having me time

•••

arnold: what's going on over there??

nabulungi: whatever it is, i'm sure it's kevin's fault

•••

poptarts: kevin can't be good at everything. he's probably a shitty kisser.

mckinley, sighing enchantedly: well, i sure hope not—

poptarts: stop being gay and focus >:/

•••

mckinley: if anyone needs anything just hit me up

poptarts: poptarts?

mckinley: noted

•••

mckinley, pushing a tear back into his eye: not now >:'/

•••

arnold, trying to be supportive: so uh. you have a boyfriend??

kevin, awkward and caught off guard: *throws up a peace sign*

arnold: two boyfriends??????? nice :D

•••

act one mckinley, @ arnold: who is this..,.,.,,., anxious lost child??

•••

nabulungi: hey, do you hear that? it sounds like... bitterness.

kevin: it's probably me

nabulungi: no, not despair. bitterness

•••

arnold: i'm a hopeless bromantic

arnold: high five me in the rain,,,, fistbump me gently as the sun sets,,,,,,,, *wipes away a tear*

•••

kevin: ghosts are fake. like the moon, and women named barbara.

nabulungi: i'm not sure what part of that we should unpack first—

•••

kevin, concerned: how long have you been awake?

mckinley: time is relative. it's a........ what's the word. ILLUSION!! it's an— *passes out*

•••

nabulungi: wh- i thought you said you were gonna let your feelings out!

mckinley: unfortunately, being aware of my negative patterns doesn't mean i have the slightest idea on how to break em

•••

kevin: i'm kevin price, i just wanna say, if you touch my vape pen, we're gonna have a problem.

•••

kevin: or... *pointed eye contact* if we break the rules!

mckinley, frantically: SIR. sir, i NEED to know. gay?? gayhaps???? gaybe?????? please tell me if this is homosexual behavior-

•••

arnold, right before man up: kevin, you CANT transfer without me— kevin, you're not listening. give me your undivided attention please—

kevin, filing his nails: you couldn't handle my undivided attention

•••

nabulungi: you were wrong.

kevin: i've been wrong a lot this week please be more specific

•••

mckinley: hey, let's slow dance

kevin, who can't dance for shit and refuses to embarrass himself: *does the macarena at 1/4 speed*

•••

arnold: hey, mckinley! i made you a sandwich as an apology

mckinley: oh, thanks—

mckinley: wait what am i mad at you for??

arnold, trying unsuccessfully to hide jsam going on behind him: id uh. hate to ruin the surprise—

•••

mckinley: tomorrow is tomorrow, i'll stay up as late as i want, fuck shit

district nine as a whole: have fun with your bad decisions sir

•••

hell mckinley: *exists*

kevin: well, mark me down as scared AND horny