chapter fifteen

DOMINIC HAPPILY THREW HIS arms around jj's neck with a smile on his face. "what the–"

sarah cut jj off, "he was stuck with rafe and the guys all night, so he had a bit to drink."

jj immediately nodded in understanding and smiled at the boy. "well, hi."

dom smiled, playing with the hair on the back of jj's head as he leaned forward, pressing a small kiss to the blond's lips. john b nearly choked on his beer and sarah simply smiled. jj's cheeks instantly turned light pink and he looked around at everyone as his hands were displayed on dom's waist. "tonight was awful." dom slurred. "i wish you could've been there to save me."

"me too." jj said, pressing a kiss to his forehead before he led the boy inside to get him some water. he sat dom on the couch before making his way over to the kitchen sink, turning on the faucet to put some water in a solo cup. "please drink this." he said, sitting down next to the boy. dom mocked him under his breath for acting like a parent and sipped the drink.

"tonight was terrible." he stated again. "i'm really happy that i'm here with you now." he let out a sigh and a frown formed on his lips as his thoughts swirled around in his head.

jj leaned against the back of the couch, slowly easing the boy backwards so that he was doing the same. "what's on your mind?"

"a lot." he mumbled, handing the half empty cup of water to the blond haired boy. he watched as jj placed it on the coffee table before returning to his spot against the couch.

"you can talk to me, you know?"

"i know." dom slowly nodded. "i just don't really know how to talk about rafe to you." he was always honest when he was drunk and he kind of hated it.

"you can talk about anything if you need to, dom." jj assured him, placing a hand on the older boy's thigh. "let it out."

"i just don't know how to feel about him, you know?" dom sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "he keeps telling and showing me how much he supposedly loves and cares about me after we break up and it's kind of frustrating. where was all of that while we were together, you know?" he huffed, "why did it take me leaving him for that all to come out?"

jj sat there silently for a moment before he licked is lips. "if he told you he loved you before you broke up...would you guys still be together?"

"god," dominic groaned, "i don't know." there was a small silence between them as both boy's brains were screaming. "ever since i met you...there's just something there." his eyes met jj's, "do you agree or is it just me?" jj remained silent as he simply watched dom's rushed movements. "you're so amazing and so kind and gentle, but rough when necessary, you know?" he reached out and ran his fingers through jj's hair. "if rafe and i were still together i don't think we'd be as close as we are and i don't think i'd feel the way i do..."

"you said you were falling for me..." jj finally blurted. "are you sure about that? i've got so many issues and so much going on. i...i don't think i'd be right for you...you deserve someone better. you deserve someone–"

"someone like rafe?" dom scoffed. "jj, i just sat at midsummers with him for hours and not once did he cross my mind. it was you. you crossed every single inch of my mind and i wanted to leave and be with you the second i got there."

"--someone that'll treat you right and show you the world. dom, i can't show you the world."

"just show me you." dom slurred. "you're my world right now, jj." he didn't give the blond boy time to respond as he grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

"you're a real fucking cheeseball. do you know that?" jj laughed against dominic's lips.

"remember how you told me it wasn't just the quiet ones that were good in bed?" dom asked and jj hummed, remembering the conversation well. "can you prove it?"

"dom," jj sighed, "you're drunk. i'm not going to take advantage of you."

"come on, jj." dom whined.

"no, dom." jj sighed. "can we talk about this when you're sober?"

"whatever." he pushed jj away and stood up, stumbling over a bit. he was able to catch himself and he turned to jj, "i'll talk to you when i'm sober." he made his way out the door and ignored the stares from everyone in the group as he walked past them and made his way down the street, not stopping when they all called for him. he pulled his phone from his pocket and called the one person he really needed at that moment. when they answered they sounded worried and he hiccuped, "can you come pick me up?" it didn't take long for rafe to arrive and when he did he quickly climbed out, rushing to the otherside of the car to help dom get in. the younger boy eagerly gripped at the collar of rafe's dress shirt. "i need you."

"what?"

"i need you." he practically begged before pressing his lips to the older boy's.

"normally i'd be down, but there's something wrong, dominic." rafe pulled away and looked at the boy. "what is going on with you?"

"jj won't sleep with me." dom muttered, his eyes beginning to water. "am i bad in bed? am i a bad kisser?"

"no, fuck, you're amazing." rafe shook his head. "dom, maybe now isn't the right time to be thinking this stuff. you're drunk. let's get you home and into bed."

"just fuck me, rafe." dom whined, trying to undo rafe's shirt buttons.

"dom," rafe sighed, "i want to, but i can't. i won't." he pressed a soft kiss to dom's forehead before looping an arm around his waist to pull him aside and open the passenger door for him. "i love you, dominic. i won't take advantage of you."

"stop telling me you love me!" dom cried, slamming his head against the back of the seat. "you didn't love me before!"

"dom–"

dom cut him off, muttering, "just take me home."

AHHHHHH i'm
messing with my
own damn feelings
bc of this book