Ian's Poop

"What's Coma gonna do for us?" I asked.
"Yeah, I read Coma once, that book was terrible*," Adam agreed.
(*jk Coma is bootiful)
"I liked Coma," Jason protested.
Everyone laughed.
"What's the book say while you skim through those pages way too quickly for the human brain to even process the words moving so quickly, Mitch?" Adam asked.
Mitch stared at the book. "Uh, I can't read."
A corner of the book began to smoke.
"Uhh, I'll take that," I said quickly, grabbing the book from Mitch's fire-hazard hands.
"Hmm...guys go through portal, go to minecraft, get kidnapped, blah blah blah plot blah blah plot plot plot blah blah, Notch needs to open the portal and the connection we have with the outside world for someone to tell Notch to open the portal is Ty's dreams, blah blah plot blah blah blah plot plot blah. Plot," I summarized.
"Not a lot of useful information there." Jerome said.
"THERE IS GLASS IN MY FACE I HATE EVERYONE," Ty announced.
Jason frowned. "Uh, what was the part about Notch and the portal again?"
I stared at him. "What?"
Jason sighed. "Nevermind. We should have Ty go to sleep so he can tell Kay to tell Notch to open the portal out of minecraft, since you obviously just ignored that perfect explanation of how we're supposed to leave here."
"I have an idea guys," Adam said. "We should have Ty go to sleep so he can tell Kay to tell Notch to open the portal out of minecraft, since you obviously just ignored that perfect explanation of how we're supposed to leave here."
"Wow, good job, Adam!" Mitch exclaimed.
"Much original," Jerome commented.
"That...whatever..."Jason sighed.
Everyone looked at Ty.
"No," Ty said. "I am not going back to that psychopath. I hate her and everyone."
"C'mon Ty-sama please ohmahguh kawaii skylox desu!" Adam begged.
"Adam, she destroyed my house and flushed my computer down the toilet, and killed someone with a door two days ago. She told me in my dreams. I. Hate. Everyone," Ty explained.
I calmly picked up a large rock and threw it at Ty's head.
He fell to the ground, unconscious.
"Yay, now he has to do it!" Mitch cheered.
"Let's hope this works, then," I said, going to retrieve the rock in case I needed it again later on.