Stepping out of the shower, I'm refreshed but absolutely drained. After spotting the fire from the hill, Levi changed course and headed to a new town. The trip was longer than either of us anticipated, and although he said carrying me wasn't an issue, as soon as we got into the hotel suite he collapsed into a chair.

I didn't complain about him holding me for a few more precious minutes, but before either of us slipped into the clutches of sleep, he insisted we both shower and properly prepare for bed. That was when I finally untangled myself from his arms and noticed how dirty both our clothes were, not to mention the hunger that finally rumbled in my stomach.

We ate our sandwiches, and it almost felt normal. Even though I haven't gotten over the fact that the cabin is gone, our routine hasn't changed. All things considered, my day is ending on a better note than it could have. I don't want to think about the worst case scenario.

As I dry myself off in front of the steamy mirror, my eyes drift up to look in the glass. The reflection is blurry, but I can still see how the marks on my side have faded to dark lines along my rib cage. Inspecting my arms, they seem to have made it through the day without further disruption. I trace the tip of my finger over lines of smooth, tightened skin of older scars, knowing where they are without having to look.

This is how I see myself. Have seen myself. No matter how dolled up I was, no matter how much makeup my mother gave me or how nice of clothing my father bought, I couldn't pretend. Hiding what I felt inside amplified what lay beneath, and the more beautiful everyone said I was, the more relief I felt in painting those crimson lines.

When I left home, the need to harm myself faded. Only on the very bad days did it rise to the surface, and somehow despite recent events, I don't feel the urge tonight. Not that I think it's gone forever.

The trust I place in Levi is greater than anyone else I've known, but I still don't know how to share this part of myself with him. Someday I want to take him up on the offer to talk. I just don't know where to start. If words could have done the job, maybe I'd have inked symbols on paper instead of carved them into my skin.

A soft knock breaks my contemplation. "I bought some clothes, there's a bag for you on the door handle."

"Thank you," I call back. Rewrapping myself with the towel, I crack open the door and grab the bag. Recognizing the brand name, I frown. It's not from a store that's cheap.

Inside are several shirts, a few pairs of jeans, some sweatpants, socks, and underwear. I flip over the tag, and read my exact size. Did he remember the measurements of the clothes from my apartment, or did he figure it out some other way? Regardless, I shouldn't put too much thought into his methods, and be grateful for the gift.

I'm learning that I'll never be able to repay him with money. Maybe in some other way, then.

One shirt in particular is softer than the rest, and I slip it on over a wireless bra. There's a pair of shorts, which is odd since I've never worn anything similar at the cabin. But they would look flattering, and just in case he slipped them for his own benefit, I put them on as well.

Also included in the bag are a hairbrush, toothbrush and toothpaste, and floss. Once I'm both clean and comfy in the new clothes, I exit the bathroom and look around for Levi.

In the small sitting area attached to the bedroom, he's hunched over a round table, hair dried but windblown as he taps on what looks like an iPad. The screen lights up his face, a hard expression outlined by his strong jaw and five o'clock shadow.

"I thought you didn't like technology," I say, slipping into a chair beside him.

"I don't," he replies. "If I could carry a library of books around with me, I would, but a search engine is a little more effective in times like this." He raises his eyes, lingering as they skim over my chest to my face. A tired smile stretches his lips. Though his eyes are saturated, dark circles contrast the otherwise pale skin.

I peek over at the screen. "What are you researching?"

He leans back and lays the tablet down on the table. "Flights, among other things. It would be no issue to take you all the way myself, or we could just as well rent a car and drive, but I assume you'd like to move as fast as possible."

"Yeah," I nod, "I would prefer that." The idea of leaving the city has never appealed to me, since everything one could need or want is sold there, but a trip with Levi doesn't sound too bad. If only the circumstances weren't so stressful. "Where exactly does this acquaintance of yours live?"

"The mountains to the north west," he replies. "At least, that's where he was last time we spoke. He's settled down a bit from the earlier centuries, so we should have an easier time in getting his attention."

The way Levi talks makes me all the more curious about the next stretch of our journey, yet I leave my questions alone for now and stifle a yawn. "Are you planning on going to sleep anytime soon?"

His eyes drift close, and his hand stretches across the table to clasp mine. He hums, but it is neither affirmative or negative.

Lifting his eyes, he studies my face. "Are you worried about not sleeping well?"

"Well, I...I guess so." Truth is, the nightmares aren't going to go away. But I have other reasons behind the question. "You look like you need rest, too."

His thumb gracefully rubs the back of my hand, back and forth leaving my skin chilled and tingling. "Then let's go to bed. I can finish in the morning."

The hotel room is a suite, a large room and full bathroom with two sinks. But one bed.

Neither of us have said anything about it, and it's really not a big deal since we've been sharing a house with one bedroom. Nothing's changed.

Not really.

Except for our small exchange outside the corner store, but even so, I don't think I'm ready for what was implied. If we had ended up at the cabin...things might be different, but now the mood is gone. Nor is my body ready for anything but sleep.

Levi's hand leaves mine, and at last I stand and walk over to the bed. It's hard not to track his movements as I pull back the blanket and slip under, curling my toes against the cold. Across the room Levi shrugs off his jacket, leaving him in a new, black long sleeve shirt and thick black pants. Monochromatic as his wardrobe is, on him the simple clothes look anything but plain. The material is stretched across his sculpted chest, and the pants hang low at his waist.

My body may be exhausted, but my thoughts begin to run rampant. Levi walks over to the opposite side of the bed and lies down over the covers. His body is so close I can almost feel it, but at the same time I can't, not nearly enough for my liking.

I roll on my side to face him. "Do you not like to sleep under a blanket?"

He turns on his side and mirrors my position. "You would get cold."

"I'd prefer to be cold on the outside, if it meant I was warm on the inside." I hold my next breath, waiting to see how he reacts to the invitation.

Keeping my gaze, he stands up and pulls back the covers, then slides under next to me. At first I think he's going to maintain the same distance as before, but then his arm stretches over my side and I feel the length of his body against mine. It is cold, but he didn't undress, so I can't feel his skin. The cotton feels kind of nice, almost like a thin sheet.

He pulls us closer until his lips dance across my forehead, down my nose to my cheek and settle on my mouth. My body sinks down, into the mattress and against his. I sigh.

"I do like sleeping under a blanket," he whispers. "Especially one as warm as this."

I can't hold my smile at bay as I shift, rolling more on my back to get comfortable.

Levi's head drops to my chest, his ear over my heart, and a part of me melts into an indiscernible pile of goo. With the arm that isn't smashed between us, I thread my fingers through his hair. It's thick, but soft, and smells like the hotel's floral shampoo.

I revel in his contented sigh. Laying beside him like this feels surreal, but it comes so easy.

Just when I should be succumbing to fatigue, my brain whirs to life. "Does being a Necromancer change anything between us? What exactly does it mean?" I whisper into the darkness.

"Mm, it doesn't change how I see you," he mumbles into my chest. "I will explain what I know, though there's more detail to it."

His arm slides down my back and over my hips, but stops once he reaches the hem of my shorts. Fiddling with the fabric and my skin underneath, he continues, "As I said before, a necromancer can control those they've raised to the undead, either a spirit, body—or in the case of a vampire, both. That is why we refer to them as a Source, because without a necromancer's contract, the undead would remain dead. They are our source of life."

"Oh," I whisper, again trying to take it all in. That means Levi died once before. That's one story I have yet to hear. "So...you have a Source?"

"Had," he corrects. "He prolonged his natural life for many years, but finally decided to lie down in a grave of his own not long ago."

His source was a man. That fact gives me comfort, though I'm not sure I should focus so much on it. "What does that mean for you? Do you need a new Source?"

I'm not sure what the process would entail, or if I'd even be able to do it in this state, but I'm willing to do anything if he needs it.

"I cannot have a new one," he sighs. "But there may be another way to bind us. That is one thing I was planning to ask Ezekiel."

"The man we're going to visit?"

"Mhm. My strength has weakened since my Source passed away. It is why Lucien thought he could handle me in a one-on-one confrontation in the first place."

I take in a deep breath. That means Levi isn't only a target, he's an easy one.

"I will help as much as I can."

"You have already done much," he whispers, sounding more tired—and relaxed, than ever. "Sleep, tomorrow we'll be busy."

"Okay," I acquiesce, though my mind still churns with thoughts. I lack the energy to connect them all, but they are still there.

Tomorrow.

Again, I feel the pull of hope and a strange sensation like the one I felt the night I laid eyes on Transylvania. A new beginning. One where I become a part of Levi's world...a world I was meant to be in all along.

The next time I visit Transylvania, I won't be a street crawler who lost her job and sense of purpose. I won't be lost or alone.

As my breaths slow and the rise and fall of my chest syncs with Levi's, I try to picture what that will feel like. Who I can become.

Who I will become.

As bittersweet as it is to say this...that's all for now, folks. Book 2 will be out sometime in the unforeseeable future. 

❤️‍🩹 Siberia