Note: I feel like some lyrics from Drinking About You by Jake Miller represent this story.

https://youtu.be/e9cP6qQognw

...

"Eddie! What did you do!??! What did you do?!? What did you do!?!"

Barry just stared.

Eddie was dying.

It was his fault.

He wasn't fast enough.

"No such thing as a coincidence."

"What is happening!?" Barry asked.

He didn't understand.

Why was he still alive?

Why was Eddie dying?

"Cisco, help me," Thawne demanded.

"Eddie's his ancestor. If Eddie dies, then he'll never be born, and... he's being erased from existence."

"Eddie! No! No! Eddie, no, no. Stay with me, okay? Stay."

"He was wrong it turns out. I'm a hero after all."

Unlike me. I'm no hero.

I wasn't fast enough (Barry's thoughts).

...

When Ronnie died, he somehow felt even worse.

He didn't think it was possible.

...

When he got home, he was greeted by a sad Joe.

"Sit down, Bear," he said.

Barry sat.

"You know this is all your fault, right?"

Ouch.

Barry nodded.

"You're gonna have to leave. Having you here... it's gonna be too hard for Iris."

Barry nodded again.

"I have to disown you, Barry."

Barry nodded again.

It made sense.

He had killed Eddie and Ronnie. He didn't deserve a family.

"Please, just pack your stuff and leave."

Barry nodded.

"If you ever come here again..." He let the threat hang. 

Barry nodded again.

It was all he could do.

...

He raced up to his room at super speed, packed all his things, and ran out the door.

He would never walk into this house again.

...

Barry sat on a bench, tears falling freely down his face.

No one cared anymore.

Why would they?

He was just a screw-up who murdered his friends.

It didn't matter that it was an accident.

Nothing mattered anymore.

He felt the tears run even faster.

The worst part?

There were hundreds of people in front of him, and none were even stopping.

He sighed.

He should probably just go to work.

He didn't really feel like work, considering that was where Eddie had worked...

Maybe he could just sit here all day.

Yes, that sounded like a great idea.

...

Barry lay with his eyes closed, tears still sliding down his cheeks.

"Never thought I'd see the great hero on a park bench."

He opened an eye to see Snart standing above him, a frown in place.

"Leave me alone," he muttered before closing it again.

"What are you doing out here?"

Barry ignored him.

He felt the bench creak.

"If you don't talk to me, I will shoot some bystander."

Barry opened his eyes and scowled at him.

"It's none of your damn business, alright?"

"Didn't know you had a mouth on you," Snart smirked.

Barry sighed.

"Just... leave me alone, alright? It's not like you actually care."

Quietly, he added, "Nobody does."

But Snart heard that.

"What do you mean nobody does!?" Snart demanded.

Barry looked at him, the tears coming back.

"'Cause of me, two of my friends died. I wasn't able to stop their killer. Happy?"

Barry stood up and walked away, leaving Len to be completely baffled.

...

Over the next few days, Barry just sat at home, alone.

He was so miserable.

He had nothing going for him in life.

Not anymore.

What had he had before?

Family.

That was gone.

And it wasn't coming back.

...

Len was shocked 

Completely baffled.

No, he wasn't surprised that Barry was blaming himself for the black hole thing.

No, he was surprised his family wasn't comforting him.

And that Barry was crying on a public bench instead of in his house.

Maybe he should investigate...

...

After a few weeks of searching, he realized he wouldn't find out unless Barry told him himself.

That would be difficult, but not impossible.

...

"Why, hello, again, Barry," Len greeted as he slid up to him in a bar.

Barry groaned.

"I'm drunk, Len. Leavemealone."

Well, this would be easier than expected.

"Len?"

"I don't feel like wasting my breath with Leonard."

Len snorted.

"Why aren't you at home?" Len asked.

"'Cause I don't have one," Barry answered before falling off the bar stool.

It took a minute to process that.

"Lenny! Help me!" Barry demanded, causing the rest of the bar's occupants to laugh. No one ever got to embarrass Leonard Snart, so this was a rare treat.

Len ignored them.

He helped Barry up and practically carried him out of the bar to his car (Len's, not Barry's).

"What do you mean?" Len asked (#JustinBieber).

"Well, I don't have an apartment," Barry shrugged.

Len almost facepalmed.

"I mean, what happened to living with Joe and Iris?"

Barry raised a lazy eyebrow.

"What do you care?"

Len sighed.

Honestly? He didn't know. It was like something was calling for him to take care of Barry Allen.

"What happened to living with Joe and Iris?" Len repeated.

"Well, remember that thing where I killed people?"

"You didn't kill anyone," Len said immediately. Barry could never kill someone.

"No, not directly. So, because I wasn't fast enough, Iris's boyfriend sacrificed himself. As for the other one, also because I wasn't fast enough, that black hole? F.I.R.E.S.T.O.R.M. had to separate in the middle of it. Only one of them survived."

"What does that have to do with where you live?" Len asked.

Barry shrugged.

"I dunno."

(#TheMindsOfTheDrunk).

Len almost facepalmed.

But that could be important information later on...

"Let's get you home," Len said as he sat Barry down in the backseat.

He put the key in the ignition and they were off.

...

When they got there, Barry was half-awake.

Len basically dragged him upstairs.

...

When Len finally managed to throw Barry into his bed, he couldn't help but think it was a miracle.

"Will you tuck me in?" Barry asked.

Len glared at him before grabbing a sheet and throwing it half-heartedly over Barry.

"I mean actually tuck me in," Barry deadpanned.

Len rolled his eyes.

"Seriously?" he asked when he saw Barry's annoyed face.

Barry nodded.

Len pushed Barry onto the bed and pushed the covers so he was in a cocoon.

Barry smiled at him.

"Thanks, Lenny," he said.

Len couldn't help but smile.

"I'll take the couch," he said.

Barry grabbed his arm.

"How'd you do that? I made you a prisoner."

Barry smiled.

"I phased," he said like it explained everything.

"Sleep in the bed. With me."

Len raised an eyebrow. Barry just nodded.

"Come on! I don't want you to sleep on a couch."

Len rolled his eyes and slid next to Barry.

He leaned over Barry and shut off the light.

Soon, both Barry and Len's light snores could be heard.

...

"Ugh," Barry groaned.

He flipped over, desperately hoping for some warmth.

It was freezing.

His stomach connected with something extremely warm.

He immediately curled around it.

He moved his head to see what it was.

He opened his eyes.

And was greeted by Leonard Snart's face.

He immediately recoiled, jumping out of bed and realizing he only had his boxers on.

Did they...

Oh, God no.

If he was a shame to his family before...

"Snart?"

"Don't you mean Len?" he smirked back.

Barry blushed.

Then he realized he was still in his boxers.

He ran toward Len's drawers and quickly threw on some clothes.

When time caught up with him, he was greeted by Len's smirk (when did he become Len?).

"Aww."

"Shut up."

Len smirked.

Barry scowled.

"I didn't know where my clothes were, and I figured you wouldn't want me looking."

"How sweet," Len said sarcastically.

Barry rolled his eyes.

"Am I a prisoner or can I leave?" Barry asked.

Notice he didn't say "go home".

"You're not a prisoner, but I want to drive you home."

Barry almost winced.

"Home" was a tough subject these days.

Sometimes it was a park bench.

Sometimes it was on the street.

When he was lucky, it was S.T.A.R. Labs.

"No thanks," Barry said as he opened the door.

He was stopped by the sound of the cold gun.

"I insist."

...

"It's still the West's place, right?" Len asked.

Barry slowed time down to think.

Should he?

Wait. Give him a random address, and saw that you don't want to give out your personal information.

"52 Mckinley street," he said (#Glee)

"That's a school, dumbass."

Whoops.

"Well, I'm not comfortable giving out my real address."

Len rolled his eyes.

"Fine. I'll just take you to West."

...

Internally, Barry's heart was racing faster than he could.

He was going to see Joe again.

Iris.

Maybe Cisco or Caitlin.

He couldn't deal with this.

How could he escape though?

If he ran out, it'd be suspicious.

If he told Len a different address, that would also be suspicious.

What could he do?!

...

Len was a trained criminal.

He knew how to spot nervous people.

And Barry was definitely nervous.

But why?

...

When they got there, Barry gulped.

He walked out of the car and just sat by a nearby tree.

"Why aren't you going inside?" Len asked.

Well...

Probably not smart to answer.

So he did the dumb thing.

He walked up to the door and knocked.

Len was still in the car.

The door opened to reveal a very angry Joe West.

...

Barry woke up, desperately clutching his sheets.

That was his second nightmare that week.

He sighed.

He needed something to take the edge of this.

Or someone.

He dialed a number.

...

"Snart?"

...

Note: I wish I had written the disowned part better but... otherwise? It was great!

What was your favorite part? Mine would probably be the part where Barry wakes up next to Len.

That made me laugh.

I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did.