Giovanni wasn't oblivious to the fact that the younger man was sulking the rest of the evening. He wasn't that much of an airhead. The whole display made him uncomfortable, more so because Ashkii was trying his best to hide it—pretending that Giovanni leaving his place to talk to a man that he regularly slept with wasn't a blow to him in any way. He faked smiles and excessively talked almost as if to push it to the back of his mind.

He was upset.

But what in the world was Giovanni supposed to do about it?

They weren't dating, and validating any of his jealousy or self-esteem issues that arose from that would only confuse him, and maybe make him think there was a chance. Giovanni didn't think he should feel bad—he'd laid out his boundaries, and the younger man had accepted them, although with some hesitance. Nevertheless, he knew what they were doing—what they had agreed to do, and his inability to cope with the fact of the matter, shouldn't make Giovanni flustered and concerned whenever Ashkii peered over his shoulder or put on a fake smile when he mentioned seeing anyone other than him.

He didn't do anything wrong, but it felt wrong. It was a frustrating new feeling he was trying his best to manage.

I'm not even doing anything with Nate. Giovanni thought to himself, feeling frustrated. Ashkii had gone to bed early, so when Giovanni climbed in after him, the younger man was already trying to sleep. Giovanni touched the small of Ashkii's back, feeling the man tense up under him.

"I'll drive you into town tomorrow," Ashkii said in a low voice, shifting under Giovanni's touch. Giovanni pulled his hand away, worried that he was making Ash uncomfortable. "I just... I want you to be safe. I have that's okay?"

"It's okay," Gio said, starting at Ash's back in the dark. "I... thank you."

For a moment there Giovanni had wanted to start explaining that it was just coffee and catching up. He wanted to let Ashkii know that there wasn't anything going on with Nate tomorrow. Sure, they were fuck buddies but it had been a while and they were actually also proper friends that just hung out sometimes, but he stopped himself. If he gave Ashkii an inch, he would take a mile — he'd learned his lesson with Leslie. He wasn't going to let someone control him like that anymore.

It took longer than normal for either of them to go to bed that night, and when Giovanni woke up Ashkii was already up. He listened to the man's food steps and the sound of dishes and utensils being washed. He got up, deciding to take a shower and clean up before Ashkii was ready to go.

The drive into town was mostly quiet. Giovanni mostly stared out at the window, but when he occasionally glanced at Ashkii he noticed the younger man's face was taut, and that his grip on the steering wheel was tense.

Ashkii pulled to a stop at a cafe.

"Thanks for the ride. Nate's going to meet me here, so you don't have to worry." Giovanni's voice was soft—more like he was talking to himself. Ashkii didn't even turn in his seat.

"Hey, did you hear me?"

Ashkii turned a little this time, nodding his head as he offered one of his fake smiles again. "Yeah. Just be safe, okay?"

"I should be. I don't plan on running into Leslie at all," Giovanni said, giving Ashkii another small smile before opening the door and stepping out. He closed it behind him, waving him off before turning and walking into the cafe.

He took a sit at the far back of the cafe and waited for Nate, who showed up a few minutes later. The small man looked odd, squishing himself into the small booth.

Giovanni smiled at him. Fuck, he was happy to see him. Not in a romantic way or anything... It was just nice to get out, and maybe pretend that his ex wasn't in town trying to stalk him.

"How's work?" Giovanni asked as Nate undid the scarf around his neck. The older man's blue eyes lifted to stare at Gio.

"It's alright. I would ask how work is on your end, but your place is closed down..." Nate trailed. Giovanni rose a brow, wondering if he was picking up Nate's tone correctly. He sounded... worried.

"Everything's under control. It's just... some maintenance..." Giovanni mumbled, unsure what to say. He had known Nate for a while, but they hadn't ever spoken about anything too personal. Nate didn't know too much about his ex or the current situation, and he wanted to keep it that way. The less people knew, the better.

"I know that's a lie, but okay," Nate said, nodding his head before looking down at the menu in front of him. "I've never been here, any recommendations?"

The two ordered, and talked — well, Giovanni mostly listened to Nate complain about his work's supervisor and the cold as he sipped on his latte. They didn't stop talking until early in the afternoon, and when Nate ran out of words to say Giovanni began looking at the clock across the room, knowing it was almost time to leave.

"I was thinking, you could come over to my hotel room..." Nate started to say, running his fingers through his blond hair. "If you want, that is. You have a lot on your mind, and you don't want to talk about it, but if you want stress relief..."

Giovanni's lips parted as he stared at the man, taking in his strong face, and his great beard. He'd rolled his grey sweater up to expose his forearms, and once upon a time, the sight would have made Gio's stomach turn with want as he imagined them holding him down.

But now...

He wasn't sure. The thought of sleeping with Nate right now was weird. Maybe he'd just lost his taste for him when the man left town for his last shift.

"Nate, I—" Giovanni started but paused. He looked at Nate, trying to find the words to say. No, he definitely still found Nate attractive, there was just something missing... His face warmed up when his mind immediately moved to Ashkii. There was something in the younger man's adoring gaze and eagerness to please that just made sex make sense... mean more.

"He doesn't want you to," Nate said, and Giovanni's breath hiked. Nate knew he was staying with Ashkii and was beginning to draw his own conclusions.

"It's not like that..." Giovanni trailed, "Have you ever known me to care about bullshit like that?" Giovanni knew he sounded defensive, but he couldn't help it. "I can decide I just want to not sleep with you."

"But you didn't say you didn't want to," Nate said, resetting his back in the booth. You're giving me that look as if you're contemplating kicking a puppy to death or something. You feel sorry for him."

Giovanni squeezed the now empty latte mug in his hands. "He looked like he was going to die when I told him I was meeting up with you today," Giovanni mumbled under his breath. "He still drove me here, though."

Nate probably couldn't catch the gravity in his words. Something that was consistent with Ashkii was that he let Giovanni do what he wanted. He didn't control him — he could do a better job of masking his feelings, sure, but he wasn't anything like Leslie, or the mirage of men who wanted to have a say in what he looked like, how ate, dressed, and who he was allowed to be friends with or not. Ashkii managed to keep to his end of the deal even though it was clearly hurting him.

"You shouldn't have gone to his place," Nate said. "I think you feel like you owe him a self-enforced don't fuck anyone else policy just because he's helping you out—"

"Don't say it like that—"

Nate scoffed. "Am I wrong?"

Giovanni didn't say anything in response, and Nate sighed, shrugging his shoulders.

"I know that I'm not the most serious person on the planet..." Nate said, chuckling a bit, "But you could have asked me for help. It doesn't matter what it was—"

"You were at work—"

"Doesn't matter. I would have called off my shift and driven to your place right away," Nate said. "I would have stayed with you, or found somewhere else for you to stay, unlike Ashkii I can actually afford it long term."

"You're not my boyfriend," Giovanni said, looking at the bottom of the mug. "We don't know or see each other like that—"

"Is Ashkii different?" Nate asked, making Giovanni look up at him. "Is Ashkii different? What's the difference between him and me? You told him whatever's bothering you, and you let him help, and I'm still in the dark. Why does he get to help you and I don't?"

Nate sighed again. "I'm even the better one at this casual sex thing, and yet..."

"I like you, Giovanni. I've never hidden that, and I like open relationships," Nate continued. "I can be your boyfriend and let you sleep with whoever you want at the same time. I don't care about your commitment issues."

And maybe that was part of the problem — Nate's Lassire Faire attitude. The way he was clearly not doing okay, and Nate was still crude enough to suggest sex like it was nothing — well, it was nothing — supposed to be nothing, but it wasn't anymore. Giovanni blinked back the tears that were forming in his eyes. He sniffled, not sure what to say. "I have a lot going on," Giovanni admitted. "My ex is in town, and he's... intense," Giovanni said, shrugging his shoulders.

"I'm just at Ashkii's until he leaves. About Ash... I don't know what it is but, I feel like I just shouldn't..." the bartender continued, referring to Nate's offer to come over to the hotel. "He wants a lot, but I... I'm not good for him. Maybe when things settle down and I'm not over-emotional and confused we can—"

"I get it," Nate said, cutting Giovanni off. "You don't have to force yourself to tell me everything."

Giovanni nodded. "Thanks."

The two left the cafe soon after and hopped into Nate's car. Giovanni gave him the address. The ride was painfully silent until Nate turned on the radio, and the two listened to the two talk hosts go on about some local news as Nate drove. Giovanni pressed his nose against the cold glass, trying to regain some sense of feeling, but the numbness in his throat and chest continued until Nate pulled to a stop in front of the building Ashkii lived in.

"Feel free to call me if you ever change your mind," Nate said. "I'll be in town for two weeks."

Gio smiled softly, nodding his head, before opening the car door and stepping out. He felt like he was finally able to breathe. Nate drove away soon after, leaving Giovanni to walk to the building and climb the stairs down to the basement suite. He unlocked the door and walked in to find Ashkii sitting on the sofa.

The younger man turned to look at him, staring up at him from the sofa. "How... how was it?"

Giovanni grinned at him, closing the door behind him before walking over to him. "Good, nothing noteworthy or anything," he muttered, feeling his chest begin to pound. He took a sit beside Ashkii. His eyes fluttered down to the man's lip. He wanted to kiss him, badly. He didn't want to fucking talk about his outing with Nate.

"Hey..." he muttered, leaning forward to close the distance between their lips.