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||Part - Fifty||

After Siya leaves from there taking Vanya with her, Riddhima goes to close the door but in her mid-way, Vansh asks her : Riddhima! The way he pronounces her name sounds so new to her ; he has never called her before with the same pinch or intensity....her mind gets sarcastic thinking "has he started love me now?" and she smiles at the thought but however, she turns around to answer his question. So looking at him with a hard look plastered upon her face, she answers : Yes!

Vansh gets little stumbled upon his own emotions when Riddhima looks at him with a far away look. He gulps the saliva, building due to this unknown Riddhima who is very different from the one he has met first. But he tries to subside his painful side of heart knowing this change is so because of him. Seeing Riddhima waiting for his reply, he clears his voice to answer : I....I am sorry..(looking at her but suddenly the painful smirk on her face forces him to bow his head)..I am extremely sorry and guilty, Riddhima. For what I have done to you earlier....

"No you aren't!"....Riddhima answers him with a soft smile that leads to a sarcastic chuckle. "You've never been sorry or guilty for what you have done with me, Mr Vansh Rai Singhania! And by the way, why will you be because I'm a selfish, greedy orphan who has been looked after by your gracious LOVE's so called family! Isn't it?"

Vansh tries to clear her : No Riddhima, she is not....

Riddhima chuckles sadly : You know Mr VR, I've always dreamt high as it's said dreams must be higher so that your views of life would be greater one too! But in mine case, I've only faced bumps on the windy roads to look at the higher points!(Vansh gulps the lump forming on his throat.) I've forgot to check whether I'm going on correct track forgetting my own existence while watching the higher dreams but no, this has brought me nothing rather than I myself have collided with the reality so hard that I've forgot of my own identity. (looking at Vansh) According to me, dream that much that suits your status! You know Mr Rai Singhania, what hurts most when you love someone the most on this earth to forget your pain, getting killed by that person emotionally. It's true you've killed my body many times by your inhuman tortures but the hurt is felt when the emotions are alive inside you, isn't it? So your forced intimacy at every night has not killed me that much rather seeing you marrying some other girl before me!

See my fate, the night before your marriage with Mrs ROSHNI Rai Singhania, you've intimated with me and me,(with a low chuckle) being a fool have always accepted it thinking may be you will love me after that and accept our marriage before this society..but this thing hasn't happened for once! My dream to see my child to get legitimacy before all gets washed away by your avoidance that day! That day you've murdered my bloody heart and the emotions in me. ONCE I'VE LOVED YOU LIKE NONE COULD HAVE! I'VE ACCEPTED YOUR EVERY NEEDS IN EACH NIGHT, EVERY TORTURES SILENTLY BECAUSE (showing towards her own heart) THIS STUPID HEART HAS FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! AND YOUR EVERY NEED HAS BECOME MY DREAM TO COMPLETE. I'VE ONLY WANTED LOVE INSTEAD OF EVERY DAMN PAINS. BUT I'VE REMAINED THE FOOL AT LAST WITHOUT ANY GAIN! BUT IT SAYS A WOMAN CAN COMPROMISE BUT WHEN IT COMES TO HER BABY, SHE BECOMES TIGRESS..true for my case too! It's indeed true. Look today I'm talking with you by looking straight at your eyes but you're ashamed to look at my eyes..and indeed, you should be. And by the way Mr Rai Singhania, for which thing you're exactly sorry or guilty! I mean for MURDER OF MY HEART or for the TRANSFORMATION OF ITS COLD HEART! Whatever it is, I don't need your sorry or guilt because now there is nothing to change our differences in life!

Vansh feels like crying - that much broken she is by HIM! One day this girl has the carefree, simplicity and LOVE in her eyes but it's HIM only to change her into a completely changed woman! This new version of Riddhima is not known to him ; she looks totally anew to him! This thought starts to raise clouds of guilt in him ; he lowers his head in shame. He feels shattered. Today he feels ashamed to be VR. He wishes if he could have been an ordinary man with normal dreams in his eyes, then he could have met her in different way and fell in love with her ; then marriage, their Vanya and happy world devoid of money, status, shining media or ROSHNI..then may be he could have been the happiest person of the world. He is blessed by God to have fame, name, money and success..but LOVE has been never on his fortune! Oops sorry, it has been but due to his own ego and stupidity, he has lost that most valuable gift from God - HIS LOVE : HIS RIDDHIMA. She has been always his, but he has never been hers..NEVER!

With a heavy heart, full of emotions, he looks at her to find her gone from his front ; he looks here and there with a madness and impatience in his eyes. He looks at his back to find his mom, dadi and sister standing at the doorstep and looking at him with a painful expression. He breaks eye lock with them and looks other side. It's true he is changed but not for all, it's for HER! He has changed his priority just for HER because he has come to know without HER LOVE, he is nothing! Moreover, he can only show his emotions whether it's tear or hurt openly to her, but before all he likes to show the facade calls the great VR.

The trio women come inside and Anupriya says : I'll talk with Riddhima, I'll tell her of Vansh's mental issues that time. I can't see my Vansh to suffer more!

But this VR is nowhere close to the former arrogant VR so he requests her : Please mom, she already loathes me much (with a crying voice yet his face adorns the sad smile to stop him from breaking down completely) now don't add more in that list! Please, take it as my request.

With it Vansh joins his both palms before her as his request. Anupriya tries to defend but Dadi stops her : No Anupriya, you'll not say anything to Riddhima because it's their personal matter and I believe Vansh will handle it in his own way. So you don't interrupt in middle and make it more serious. With a nod, Anupriya accepts her defeat.

Meanwhile, Ishani who has gone with them for dadi's check up gets into thought : Today when I myself fall in love, I know how it feels to be cheated and betrayed by your own partner! One day I've used so many wrong words by accepting Vansh bhai's happiness in that Roshni and supporting bhai thoroughly in it. But today I feel to spit on my own face! I know I can't take back the words from past and wipe away the scars from bhabhi's heart but I'll try to rectify it. I PROMISE IF IT MEANS TO GIVE MYSELF IN THE HANDS OF DESTRUCTION TO SAVE RIDDHIMA BHABHI IN NEAR FUTURE THEN I'LL NOT LOOK BACK! It is easy to say heavy words from outside but when you've your love beside you then you can do it easily. I know when VIKRAM is always beside me knowing my past mistakes too, then he will surely help me to rectify all my past deeds!

Once I've lectured upon class, status, money and so many things to bhabhi but now I myself feel these earthly materials as useless! Even oneday I've said so many bad things on her being forced by bhai, but now I feel ashamed to look at that Ishani to utter such things for a woman. Being a girl, I've been ignorant towards another girl's respect, then how could I ask the same from opposite race? I've learnt this when I myself have to go through the same pain, being bullied and abused by some nasty goons! All thanks to my LOVE, if he hasn't come on time, I don't know where I could have been now. If Vikram hasn't come in my life, I would have been the old Ishani who is proud of her own status. But meeting with Vikram and seeing that bright smile intact on his face always after fighting with his deadly disease called blood cancer and struggling between money and poverty, I feel myself a fool! It's the real life where people have to struggle for their life and existence and the smile after the win is blessing! And I promise to do anything to see that smile on bhabhi's face so that my sin could be washed away.

•••

After confrontation with Vansh, Riddhima goes to her room and takes the portrait of Vanya placed on the table. By picking it up she rubs her hand upon the face of her baby as she is before her in real : I know baby, you need your father in your life but believe me..I'm trying to keep my coolness intact! I'm trying to forget the amount of shame and humiliations he has done upon my soul but then also I'm trying ..trying hard just for you. It's not easy to forgive the person behind your destruction of your self respect but for your happiness I'll do anything ; seeing him everyday before my eyes is like drink the poison but I'll accept poison happily if you're happy. Just always remember baby, MOMMA HAS ALWAYS LOVED YOU AND WILL LOVE YOU TILL THE END OF HER LIFE!

Anupriya listens her whispers but says nothing because all are outside and they have asked her to be away from this matter. So she goes from there.

Other side, Vansh places her left hand upon his chest when he feels something paining there. Today listening to Riddhima, he comes to the conclusion that Riddhima will never accept him in her life ever but will not deny his presence too in their daughter's life because their baby needs both of her parents ; seeing indifference in Riddhima's eyes for him something churns inside his heart ; suddenly it starts to pain more. Without bothering anyone, he lays on the sofa and starts to rub his chest to subside the pain by clenching his teeth ; this pain is too much to tolerate. Now he can understand how much pain Riddhima used to feel that time when he used to show his hatred for her! His guilt and shame is tearing apart his heart into pieces. Today he has nothing to say to anyone because his destiny is written by his own fault. So he wants to tolerate every pain without any protest if it could lessen his sin.

•••

As soon as Siya completes saying, Angre shouts : Are you mad Siya that you're telling me this thing now only? You know how dangerous she can be for boss and bhabhi's married life when it's already on the way of breaking ; even now a little life is standing between them. By the way, when and how you have come to know this?

Till now Vanya and Lily have been happily enjoying the comedy scene by rewinding it again and again. But when Angre shouts Vanya gets afraid so Siya eyes Angre who feels sorry to frighten the innocent baby. He asks sorry and tells her to enjoy playing with Lily. Being innocent, she happily starts playing with Lily.

Here Angre concentrates on Siya finding Vanya's attention is diverted towards another direction ; Siya starts to tell him how she has encountered Roshni in garage of Riddhima's apartment and then few minutes ago in the cabin itself where they are standing now! Angre places his both palms upon his face in frustration and mutters something in his mind. But something clicks in his mind and he quickly dials someone's number and orders : Just follow the girl who has left from VR Design House, I'm damn sure she is living somewhere in this area ; I want her location and each thing related to her. Take as many persons need in that work but I want the news within next twelve hours.

And then he asks Siya to go to home safely by taking Vanya as he doesn't believe that Roshni so he asks two guards to send them home safely. And as per his order, Siya returns without any nagging because she understands the matter to be a serious one.

•••

Angre is walking from here and there in tension ; and why will he not be? His boss is already wounded so he is taking rest leaving everything upon him and Aryan to look after and here he can't even do anything to save his boss and his family from the upcoming danger. Last time the storm named 'Roshni' has destroyed his boss's married life but this time Vanya is also present in the picture. So he is afraid how to save them from something inevitable.

He remembers how before two days he has asked his men to search everything about Roshni and asked them to find out her place ; but it seems like this time that girl has come with more strong plans to fail the Rai Singhania family. After going behind her for few times, they have lost her track. Actually due to traffic, the cars have stopped in some signal while Roshni has left from the taxi without letting others know ; even the taxi driver couldn't point out to which direction she has gone! And damn! It's already two days to go that much quick and there is no news of Roshni, heck that clever witch has stopped coming into work ; and most surprisingly, after searching the whole Jaipur also the men couldn't have found out that Roshni's place ; where she lives or how she gets disappeared is still a mystery to Angre!

Meanwhile in Riddhima's appartment, the bell rings and Riddhima goes to open the door to see who has come there at this time. But to her surprise, someone has sent courier for her. Signing on their registry book, she takes the courier and comes inside by closing the door. Going to her room, she opens the packet to get surprised! Her eyes become widen in shock and her mouth gets ajar. Tears start to roll from her eyes and her old wounds get fresh with the memory! Truly, Roshni has achieved her first success!

Precap : Riddhima comes to know of Vansh's mental illness ; a storm - to destroy EVERYTHING!

•••

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