The courtyard was a clearing in the forest flanking the Magic Road. Bird songs sounded so wrong in Xanthy's ears as she eyed a throng of people gathering around a pile of shrouded bodies laid in neat rows over the grass. Cold wind blew around them in quick blasts.

Xanthy hugged herself. She huddled closer to Nyxis who stood close to her. His mouth was pressed in a thin line but he slung his arm over Xanthy's shoulder. She swallowed the bitter taste blooming at the back of her throat.

Vikara stepped through the crowd, hefting a lit torch. She raised it in the air and the people present ducked their heads in respect. From the corner of Xanthy's eyes, familiar blond hair swayed with the breeze. Her stomach twisted tighter.

The Draswists were present.

"May the soul of the fallen find rest in the Land of Wonders," Vikara started. Xanthy glanced at Marin's face to find the girl staring back at her with blazing eyes.

Vikara strode towards the shrouded bodies. Xanthy clasped her hands in front of her to keep them from shaking. Which of those was Jarvik's? "May their legacies be remembered to be honorable and may their trails forever blaze a spark. With the lasting blessing of Pidmena, I declare their souls free. We, in this assembly, usher you to glory until our last breaths."

"Aschui," the rest of the crowd answered in unison. The word stuck at the back of Xanthy's head. In her lifetime, she had attended hundreds of ceremonies for the dead. Never before did she choke upon saying "I concur".

Fear wrapped around her throat. If she said the word, then Jarvik's death would be true. Final.

Vikara crouched by the first shroud and dipped the torch's dark fire. Silence ate away at the rustle of leaves and the animals' calls. Xanthy's chest constricted while watching the fire lick the first body and travelled down the whole array.

So many lives lost. Wasted.

And for what?

That's another thing Xanthy didn't know. She doubted she'd ever know in her lifetime. If there's anything she learned from this, it's that people would fight for what they believe in without explanation. Most of the time, even without compulsion.

The midday sun bore down through the spaces between leaves. Fire feasted on the shrouds, crackling and cracking. Xanthy raised her eyes to the sky and closed her eyes. Tears dropped from her eyes.

Jarvik, wherever you are, I hope you are happy, too.

The wind ruffled the trees' canopies in response.

Then, from the corner of her eyes, Marin's blond head ducked. She slipped away from the crowd with a quiet grace. People bearing faces similar in Xanthy's eyes faded as she tore out of Nyxis's hold and followed where Marin went.

Marin's frail back trudged back to the Temple's stairs. Xanthy jogged, reached out, and grabbed the girl's arm.

"Let go!" Marin yanked her arm. "Stop following me!"

Xanthy's heart wrenched. This was her reckoning. "I am so sorry, Marin," her voice came out desperate, pleading. "I never meant for any of this to happen."

Marin's back was to Xanthy. The girl's fists clenched. "Your apology will not bring him back, right?" she scoffed. "It's up to me to figure out how to bring the things back to the way they were. I cannot trust people to help me anymore," she turned to Xanthy with tear-stricken cheeks and eyes burning with untempered anger. "I cannot trust you."

Xanthy drew back. Her guts felt like it was just slapped. "You were there, Marin," she reasoned. "You saw how I was too late to save him."

"One word, Xanthy," Marin jabbed a finger in Xanthy's direction. Her face resembled ajilte fruits. "One word and he could still be alive with us now! But no!" Marin laughed without humor. "You chose to honor your sacred duty more than my father's life. You chose to let him die so you could save yourself."

Xanthy didn't speak.

"You are right," Marin continued. "I was there. I should have been the one to save him. Instead, I trusted you."

"I did not ask you to trust me," Xanthy said quietly. Tears pricked at the edge of her eyes. "If I could go back, I will save him. You are not the only one suffering. I am, too."

"Suffering in action will not bring him back," Marin's tone was cold. Flat. "Just like killing the Queen won't bring my mother back to life."

Xanthy shook her head. "What are you going to do now?"

"I am going to find a way to bring Dad back," Marin said. "Do not stop me."

A lump formed at Xanthy's throat. "It is forbidden to raise someone from the dead," she stepped forward. "Marin, please."

"What did Dad say?" Marin snapped.

Xanthy blinked. "He told me to take care of you," she gulped. "And I intend to honor that. Please, Marin. Whatever you are planning, do not do it. It would not end well."

Marin turned away. "Take care of Malin," she wiped the back of her hand over her eye. "Tell him—" she choked. "Tell him his sister is going on an adventure."

Faster than Xanthy could lunge, Marin trudged towards the corner of the Temple. Xanthy clenched her fists to her sides. Footsteps scratched behind her. She turned to find Malin staring at her with wide, green eyes.

"Did she just leave me?" Malin asked. Xanthy's chest tightened.

Xanthy's chin quivered. Malin bounded towards her and wrapped his arms around her waist since he stood up to her stomach. "It is fine, though," Malin peered up at Xanthy with sparkling eyes. There was no sadness reflected in them. "I still have you."

Xanthy coughed. Malin drew away and she put her hands on his shoulders. Such a great weight on someone so young. It's unfair. "I am so sorry, Malin," she muttered. "I wish I could have saved him."

Malin laid a hand over hers. "You did what you could," he whispered back.

"You are not angry?" Xanthy knitted her eyebrows.

Marin rolled his shoulders. "I considered stabbing you in your sleep," he blurted. Xanthy cleared her throat. Gods, how honest could Malin be? "But then again," he continued. "If I kill you, no one would take care of me. No one will stay by my side."

"Malin, I—"

"It is fine if you have somewhere to be," Malin continued. "I will stay here and talk to the gargoyle Priestess. I will wait for you to come back as well as my sister."

"I do not want to put you in danger," Xanthy smiled through her quaking heart. "Do you understand that?"

Malin nodded. His lips stretched into a wide smile. "Hey, when you get back, will you take me to see all the Palaces?" he gripped Xanthy's waist tighter. "Please?"

A laugh broke out of her lips. She tousled Malin's hair. "Of course," she nodded. She didn't know how to do that, though. Guess she'll have to figure it out.

"That is a promise!" Malin let go of Xanthy and dashed up the Temple's steps. Xanthy watched his small frame disappear inside.

Xanthy turned away from the Temple and back to the line of tree trunks blocking her view of the Magic Road. The smell of burning cloth wafted in the air with ashes dancing in the wind with every blow.

She took a deep breath. It shook. She won't cry. She had cried enough.

Tears dropped from her eyes. No. She rubbed her eyes but the more she did, the more fluid flowed. No. No.

"Xanthy?"

She raised her head. Through her blurry vision, she registered white hair and a dark cloak. June.

She didn't think. She couldn't, anyway. Her legs ran towards him. His arms wrapped around her the moment she slammed into his chest. Her shoulders shook as sobs gripped her entire being.

Tired. She was tired of failing. First, Jarvik. Then, Marin. Malin. Perhaps, she had failed June, Nyxis, and Reeca, too.

This is all your fault. Reeca's voice echoed over and over in her head.

It's true. Everything wouldn't end up the way it was if she wasn't in the equation. This was her fault.

She cried for the men who lost their lives and left their families alone. She cried for Nyxis who would forever bring the weight of his family's death on his shoulders. Lastly, she cried for the Draswists, for the tragedy they faced because of her mistakes.

"I'm sorry," she muttered to no one. "I'm so sorry."

June said nothing but he held her until her eyes emptied their well of tears, until she couldn't stand on her own anymore. His warmth, his stability. They were the only things Xanthy counted on in this crazy, crazy world.

She could only hope that it was enough.