June slammed the door behind him, shutting it in Xanthy's face.

"June!" Xanthy pushed the door open. They were back in their shared room with June having his back to her.

"What are you even doing here?" June rasped. His Keijula was as fluent as his common tongue.

Xanthy shut the door behind her and sighed. "I didn't know," she blurted. This was probably the lamest apology she mustered all her life. Not that she had to apologize for something before. "Why didn't you tell me?"

June scoffed and turned to her. "And what? Have you call me a 'hideous monster'?" he gestured vaguely around them. He cursed as he shoved his fingers into his hair and braced his hips. "Gods, you're such a hypocrite."

The word stabbed Xanthy's heart. Hypocrite.

June huffed. "I don't even understand why you suddenly wanted to rescue the Draswists," he shook his head. "What? Are you trying to atone for your sentiments? Are you trying to play the good, noble guy? Just because you have that special magic doesn't make you a savior."

"I know that," Xanthy rasped. She ran her hand over her arm. "I don't know how I am supposed to save anything when all I do is endanger everyone. But know this," she raised her eyes to meet June's dark ones. "I never wish to be the good guy or a savior. I just need to save my friends."

Her eyes burned and she tried blinking her tears away. "And if you think that I'm as shallow as you've said," she wiped the rebellious tears that fell. "Then there's no use in helping me, right? You're free to go. Forget about me."

June was silent. His fists were curled at his sides.

"I'm sorry for the things I've said about fairies and half-bloods," Xanthy blew a shaky breath.

"Stop," June whispered.

Xanthy shook her head. "No, hear me out. I'm still learning, June. I promise I will be better—"

"Just stop, will you?" June put his arms forward. "Stop."

"June, I—"

June clicked his tongue. "I've heard enough."

"Why are you even here?" Xanthy narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms. "Are you one of the people aiming to get the Virtakios, too?"

"No!" June yelled. He pushed his hair off his face. "Is that really what you take me for?"

Xanthy laughed without humor. "Well, you did take me for less," she snapped. "What's stopping me from doing it to you?"

"This is impossible," June massaged the bridge of his nose. "I need to go."

Xanthy sidestepped as June strode past her to reach the door. "June—"

"I need to get ready for tomorrow," he muttered as he yanked the door open. "To think this is all for you and about you."

The door slammed in Xanthy's face before she could react to June's sentiment. Xanthy let him.

Xanthy clutched her chest and closed her eyes. Her heart quivered along with the storm of her emotions. She leaned against the door and blinked away the tears that threatened to fall.

She couldn't care less if June gave up on her. In fact, she didn't care about anything at all. It's like everything she touched would eventually crumble to dust. Then, the wind would swoop in and blow the remnants away, leaving her with nothing.

Tears broke free from her eyes and she didn't bother wiping them away. A hypocrite. That's what she was. And would ever be. June was right about one thing. She wanted to save the Draswists to prove that she wasn't as evil as she witnessed herself to be. That inside her, beyond the influence of that darkness, there was still a shred of good. Somewhere.

Like June, perhaps she was looking for light in this world of darkness. She was on her own. Groping around. Feeling the world. Making mistakes that cost too much. Perhaps, that was meant to be her destiny. Forever.

"Well, that is a bummer," Nyxis scratched his temple and dropped his chin into his palm. "He should not have said that."

Xanthy squealed in frustration as she paced. Nyxis had found Xanthy earlier and thirty minutes had passed since Xanthy started ranting about how everything in her life went wrong. Not only was she left out like a used rag, she also got her intentions questioned and her motives doubted.

"You should not have said that, either," Nyxis continued. Xanthy stopped pacing to whirl to him.

"Whose side are you on?" she demanded.

Nyxis shrugged. "No one's," he scratched his head. "From what I can see, you should have given him the chance to process his feelings before promising to change. You did not even apologize properly."

Xanthy grunted and plopped into the mattress beside Nyxis. "What should have I said after he made me feel worse than I already felt when all I wanted was to make sure he is alright after having his secret exposed in such an unexpected turn of events?"

Xanthy rubbed her face and let her body fall sideways. Her head was inches from Nyxis's outstretched legs. "I mean, why would he even get angry at me?" she laid her hands in front of her and frowned.

"Well, you did tell him half-bloods are bloodthirsty monsters because you thought he is human," Nyxis reasoned. "I would have been angry that you suddenly decided to make up and cover up your mistake as soon you realized he is one."

That...made sense.

"What should I even do now?" Xanthy propped herself up with her arm. The mattress ate away at her body. "I think we both know at this point that I suck at apologizing."

Nyxis touched his chin. "Give him time," he crossed his legs. "Then, make it up to him by genuinely learning about fairies and half-bloods. Surround yourself with them to learn that they are not as bloodthirsty as you think they are."

"Yeah, okay," Xanthy sighed and dropped back against the mattress. Her eyes studied the bare, gray ceiling. The Temple could use a talented muralist. "Maybe that is why I wanted to go to the Palace to at least make it up to the Draswists. I mean, it is my fault that they are purged in the first place."

"Why would you even think that?" Nyxis asked.

Xanthy reached up and twisted a lock of hair with her finger. "The Civil Guards are looking for me," she sighed. "They just disguised the whole thing as a purge so they can detain me."

"Back up a second," Nyxis's tone was confused. "Why are they after you?"

"I am the Virtakios," Xanthy blurted. The words that flew out of her mouth and their certain order and combination sounded so wrong yet somehow...right. In an ideal world, Xanthy and Virtakios shouldn't even come within a thousand distance's radius around each other.

Nyxis was silent.

"Nyxis?" Xanthy called.

Nyxis's legs flinched. "Yes?" he cleared his throat. "Virtakios, huh? How does that feel?"

"It sucks, really," Xanthy stuck her bottom lip out as she grimaced. "There is a prophecy that says I am going to save the world. With a power I could not even control."

"The world is bigger than you thought, I take it?" Nyxis said.

Xanthy snorted. "A lot bigger," she chuckled without humor. "Nobody even told me klaire fruits are not meant to be eaten."

Nyxis gave her a light laugh. Silence coated the air for a few seconds.

"So, what do you plan to do now?" Nyxis asked.

Xanthy pushed herself up and leaned her back against the mattress pressed to the wall. Just like that, she and Nyxis were back in this position. "I still feel like I have to go to the Palace," she played with her fingers and scratched at her palms. "I have to save my friends."

Something rustled and clunked. Xanthy glanced at Nyxis to find him peering over his reflection over his handheld mirror. He caught her staring and he flashed a smile at her. "Do I look okay?"

Xanthy fought the rush of blood into her cheeks. More than okay, she wanted to blurt but that would be improper. She didn't have much experience about boys her age. Still, Nyxis's face was one of the most eye-pleasing things she had seen. Of course, she'd never say that aloud in front of his face or anywhere with the same air he was breathing.

"Yeah, fine," Xanthy flashed him an alright-gesture. "Why are you always checking your reflection, anyway?"

"Force of habit," was Nyxis' muttered answer.

After a few seconds, Nyxis tore his attention away from his reflection and turned to her. "So, are you going to disobey Vikara and go to the Palace?" he asked.

Xanthy snorted. "Vikara will kill me if I do," she pursed her lips. "Have you seen how fast that woman could swing a dagger? How about no? I will stay here."

Nyxis raised an eyebrow. Xanthy clicked her tongue. "Okay, I do really want to go," she groaned. "Why must things be so complicated?"

"If it is easy, we would not bother living, at all," Nyxis chuckled. Xanthy opened her mouth only to close it again. Huh. Good point.

"So?" Nyxis prodded.

Xanthy punched him lightly on the arm. "You enabler," she teased as she crossed her arms. "Fine, I will go. I will save my friends. You sure you do not want to come?"

Nyxis shook his head and gasped out a small laugh. "Are you kidding? My mother will skin me alive if I ever stepped foot inside the Royalty region," his face turned serious. "Besides, I do not think I would be able to face them again."

"Why not?" Xanthy cocked her head to one side.

"I disappeared for years and now I would suddenly pop up like a sempervivum bush?" Nyxis dusted imaginary dirt from the sleeves of his faded tunic. "My mother is not a forgiving person. My older brother is not exactly the best one around, either."

Xanthy grinned. "Oooh. You have a big brother?"

"Please, do not," Nyxis buried his face in his hand. "Let us just say that they would not be thrilled to see me again. And I, the same."

"Geez," Xanthy breathed. "Everything is complicated."

Nyxis snorted in reply.

"Is it alright if I call you 'Nyxis'?" Xanthy knitted her eyebrows as she angled her shoulders towards him. "Do I not have to address you by your fancy title and such?"

Nyxis rolled his eyes. "Do not patronize me. 'Nyxis' is fine."

Xanthy nodded. "Okay, Nyxis," she raised her eyes to meet his. Her heart had never felt this light in such a long time. "Thank you."

"For what?" Nyxis raised an eyebrow.

Xanthy bumped her shoulder against his. "For listening."

"Are you going to be alright?" Nyxis's eyebrows met as concern marred his features.

"I will try," Xanthy answered with a smile she hadn't shown anyone in a long, long time.