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"Code white, 6C2. Code white, 6C2."
All the nurses had a good idea on who the subject of this emergency announcement was, it indicated an agitated and possibly violent person and it necessitated the response of all available staff as they rushed to the only patient in the ward.
It didn't always used to be one person in the ward but the hospital had to make a quick decision of moving out every other person when Annabelle's condition spiralled out of control.
So many times, she'd always tried to hurt her roommate. Annabelle couldn't go to the bathroom without a razor blade, she always made sure to cut herself and watch the blood trickle down and drop on the floor as she took a shower. No matter how many times razor blades have been taken from her, she always found ways to get new ones, nobody knows where, how or when. Staffs always came in to go through her wears and personal things but they never saw anything that wasn't supposed to be there.
Her eyes flickered towards them as they burst into the room and they all stood there looking back at her, none of them knew what the situation was or how they'll take control of it.
Her eyes flickered upwards to the ceiling and a look of terror crossed her face as she pleaded.
"Please, I don't want to, I'm tired, I do not, I'm not--"
She was talking to the force that gripped her from within her own mind, her face was contorted with so much rage and pain. But in that moment, Elenora saw a chance to save this poor seventeen years old.
She stretched forth her hands cautiously towards Annabelle. "I know you don't want to and that's because you are a good girl."
Annabelle's eyes trailed down to Elenora and they made eye contact.
" All you have to do is focus on my voice, just listen to me and I will help you." Elenora continued.
Annabelle didn't respond for a while but after some time, she slowly stretched out her hands and Elenora grabbed it, rubbing it gently, applying steady pressure, trying to give her a sensation to focus on. Another nurse behind them cautiously stepped forward and took her other hand, doing what Elenora did.
"Should I sing you a song?" Elenora asked and Annabelle nodded slightly.
"You are my buddy, until the end--"
"--more than a buddy, you're my best friend." The other nurse joined in.
Seconds later, other nurses had joined in and they all sang her the buddy song.
As they all sang loudly with smiles on their faces, one of the nurses cautiously and secretly went close to her and sank a syringe into the muscle of her thigh, putting her to sleep.
Annabelle's eyes immediately opened as she laid in bed, breathing heavily, and she was covered in cold sweat. Her nightmares always came back to haunt her and to remind her of this particular moment in her life, —one of the worse days in her life at the psych ward. She blinked several times to clear her vision but it was still blurred, her mouth was dry and her body began to twitch.
Fucking Haldol and Thorazine.
"Fuck you Elenora." She said to herself.
She felt so drowsy and restless. She winced and sucked in a breath as the sharp pain shot through her thighs and twitched.
Muscle spasms.
After laying in bed in extreme pain for a few minutes more, –that was how long her muscle spasms usually lasted– she ran a tired hand over her face and released a breath. She threw her legs off the bed, sat straight up and stared at the opened window which was surprisingly still opened since her mom opened them two days ago.
She groaned as the conversation they had two days ago crossed her mind.
"Basic guide on ways to kill people, dispose off bodies and get away with it."
"Uhm so?" She questioned and her mother stared at her in disbelief.
"What do you mean so?" She asked, "why do you have that kind of document on your computer?" She added.
"Because I wanted to read it."
"Why?"
"Just because." She shrugged and Freya scoffed.
"Unbelievable!" She exclaimed, "do you know the amount of trouble you'd get into if this document is ever found on your computer?" She asked.
" Do you know the amount of peace you'd feel if you started minding your own damn business and leave me the hell alone?!" Annabelle shot right back and the place became quiet.
Hurt flashed through Freya's eyes as the words rolled right out of her daughter's mouth.
"Mo--" Annabelle started.
"Save it." Freya said with a small smile but she was obviously hurt as she stood up and slowly walked out of the room.
"Dammit!" She exclaimed and punched the wall beside her.
Suddenly, she could sense a presence, she could sense him watching her, it was like she could see him from the corner of her eye but she didn't want to look, or else he was going to talk to her.
She didn't like talking to him, he was a monster, he always told her she was a piece of shit, that no one cared about her, that she was always the last on everybody's list and she didn't need to hear that now.
If anything, she knew, she felt like she was the last on everyone's list, if at all she was on their list. And now she felt it, she felt something calling her away. The same force that gripped her that day at the psych ward was calling her, dragging her away.
The driving need to hurt someone came.
She slapped her hands over her ears and groaned as she shut her eyes tightly.
"Get out of my head." She pleaded.
There was an overwhelming need, an overwhelming need to hurt someone badly.
"Why does it have to be me?!"
"Why are you targeting me?!"
"Where are you coming from?!"
She suddenly felt drowsy and restless, her vision suddenly became blurry. She shook her head and blinked numerous times but there was still no change. She felt around her bed for her pills, but they weren't there.
She tried to think of where she had left them and she wanted nothing more than to drag her hair out when she remembered she had tossed them on the counter when she got back home yesterday.
She wanted nothing more than to hurt herself over and over again to distract the voices in her head.
She picked up her phone and checked the time.
3:00AM
The drive for the desire to inflict pain and misery on someone came. She felt so detached from herself that there was a general feeling of discontentment. She felt confused and disorientated as she got up from her bed slowly and turned towards the closed door.
She saw him walk up to her, he held her face and shoulder, he always did so but this time it was different, he was silent.
"Go to the living room." A voice spoke, "I have something to show you," it added.
She looked down and squeezed her eyes shut. " He's not real Annabelle, you're hallucinating again," she muttered a couple of times.
She opened her eyes a while later and looked up, he was still there looking at her, his hands were still on her face and shoulder.
"Who are you and what do you want?" She asked.
He was always in her room, she always saw him, he manipulated her thoughts, he was always whispering words to her but he wasn't now. He was silent this time.
The need came again, the driving force, it gripped her from within her mind and before she knew it, she was walking out of her room and into the living room.
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Not how long but how well you lived is the main thing.
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