That evening, Tae and I are snuggled up together on a lounge chair watching the moonlight play off the ocean below.

"This is so lovely," I say. "I'm sad that we have to go home tomorrow."

He strokes my hair and kisses the side of my head. "Maybe we should raise the kids here. They could just play in the sea and grow up with less stress."

I sit up and look at him in mock surprise. "How many kids do you have? Why am I just learning about them now?"

He scoffs at me. "No, I mean our future kids!"

I laugh, then suddenly choke and hop off his lap to run up and down the top ten beach stairs a few times.

He laughs humorlessly as I come back and look at him, breathing heavily. "Birdie, why does that make you panic?" His eyes look so huge and sad that I'm having trouble meeting them.

I exhale hard. "I don't know, babe. It is nice here. I just... I just... I don't know." I press my lips together and my eyes fill with tears. "It freaks me out to think about the future that way, I guess. I mean, don't get me wrong, I would love to have kids with you, but... but..." I exhale again and turn away for a minute. I turn back and look at him. "I think it freaks me out that I love you so much, and, and, I guess it makes me panic when I think about the future because I'm afraid it might not work out that way and..." I start crying too hard to speak.

Taehyung stands up and walks over to me. He pulls me into a hug, and rocks me from side to side. "It's OK. It's OK. I love you so much, and I will do everything a human can do to make sure that we're together forever."

I cry harder. "Are you sure you want to do that, love?" I say after a bit, sniffling and laughing weakly. "I'm kind of a basket case. I panic at the idea that we might break up someday, but when you say that we'll be together forever, that makes me panic too!" I chuckle and bow my head, hyperventilating again.

Tae sighs and chuckles a little bit. "It's going to be OK. And it's OK that you panic sometimes. I think you would be too perfect for me if you didn't have this one little problem!" He hugs me closer.

I scoff and try to pull myself together. "Thank you for understanding, sweet man. I really don't want to hurt your feelings with these panic attacks, you know that, right? I'm just not very good with all these emotions that are swirling around inside me." I turn my head and kiss his chest. "And now I feel like I'm ruining our nice vacation, too." I puff out a big breath.

Taehyung bends down and scoops me up in his arms. "Nothing is ruined. It's all OK. You're fine. We're fine. Don't worry about anything." He carries me over to the lounge chair and settles down again, holding me tight. "We'll figure it out together. Just stay by my side. We'll figure it out. I love you, my Birdie."

I lean into him and sigh, concentrating on slowing my heart beat. "I love you, Tae. You're right. As long as we're together, we'll be fine."

He squeezes me hard. "It's getting a little chilly now. Should we put our bathing suits back on and get in the hot tub?" I nod and kiss his chin.

By the time we're ready for bed, I feel more like my normal self. As Tae comes out of the bathroom, I look over at him and laugh. "Hey, did you ever measure my favorite chair, so we can get one, babe?" I ask.

He laughs and walks over to it, using his hand to measure the height of the back against his body. "OK, it's this high!" he says. He stares down at the chair for a long moment, then turns around and bites his lip at me.

I giggle. "Uh-oh. What's that look?"

"Before we buy one, we should check and make sure that it's multifunctional." He sexy-snarls at me, and runs his tongue out the side of his mouth.

I raise my eyebrows at him and laugh. "I mean, I assume you can just sit in it, too..." I say.

He walks over to where I'm sitting on the end of the bed, and leans over to kiss me deeply. "I have an idea!" he says, grinning at me.

I chuckle. "Mmm. OK, I'm in. What's your idea?" I say, grabbing his cute ass, which makes him laugh.

He gathers all four of the pillows off the bed, and piles them onto the arm chair. I watch him, wondering what exactly he has in mind, and then I get up to close the accordion door and the blinds.

He comes over and kisses me again, slowly hiking my nightgown up my body and then pulling it over my head. He kisses down my neck and across my collarbone, his hands gently stroking my hips. I moan softly, and unbutton his pajama top, lightly scratching my nails up and down his sides. Tae starts to walk me backward toward the bed, and we topple over together onto it, our lips locked together. I reach down and start easing his pajama pants off of his hips. He reaches for a condom and rolls it on, then starts laughing.

"What?" I say grinning up at him. "What's so funny?"

"Ugh, Birdie, you're so sexy that I almost forgot my idea!"

I giggle at him. "Are we supposed to be doing this on the chair?"

"Yeah!" he says. "Come on!" He stands up and kicks his pajama bottoms away, then reaches his hands out to me.

I laugh again. "You'll have to explain your concept to me, love!"

He smiles, and bends down to kiss me again, then hoists me up. Instinctively I wrap my legs around him, and he takes a couple of steps forward. His arms support my back as he lays me down on the pile of pillows, my ass resting on top of the chair's back.

"Oh, I see," I breathe, smiling up at him. I grab the armrests and arch my back up, and he groans, then walks around to the front of the chair and kisses me upside down. We both laugh at the unfamiliar sensation. He kisses up my body and begins to nibble and suck my breasts, then one of his hands reaches up to lightly tease my clit. I kiss his neck and run my hands through his hair, a little frustrated that I can't reach more of him.

"Are you ready?" he breathes into my ear.

I turn my head and kiss his cheekbone. "Yes!" I whisper back.

He gives me an open-mouth grin, and walks around to the back of the chair, spreading my legs and wrapping them around himself. I lock my feet together and smile at him, breathing fast in anticipation. He puts just his tip in and then pumps with the tiniest movements ever, holding my thighs and watching my face. I gasp and whimper, desperate to have all of him, but he continues to advance and withdraw by millimeters each time, his forehead furrowed in concentration.

"Ohmygod, Tae, just, just, PLEASE!" I beg, my face contorting and my vagina contracting around him, trying to pull him in. He is grimacing hard, trying to stay in control, still teasing me mercilessly. I grab my breasts and squeeze them, throwing my head back against the pillows, my body dying for more stimulation, and this breaks his resolve.

"Uh, uh, oh!" he moans, and buries himself in me hard. I narrow my eyes in ecstasy and relief, looking up at him through my lashes, and he arches his neck and starts to pound into me relentlessly. I pinch my nipples and gaze up at him as he frantically slams into me. We come together, yelling hoarsely, but I feel strangely empty. Lying back on the pillows, and looking up at his face, I start to cry again.

Tae looks down at me and his eyes open wide. "Oh, Birdie!" He comes over and helps me sit up. "What's wrong? You didn't like it?"

"No, you were so far away! You were so far away," I sob. He scoops me up again and carries me to the bed, laying me down and covering my body with his own.

"I'm right here. I'm right here. Please don't cry, my love. I'm right here." He reaches down and pulls the blankets up over our heads. His voice cracks as he says, "I didn't mean to make you sad! I'm sorry!"

I cling to him, and try to calm myself down. After probably five minutes or so, I am able to stop crying and I turn my head to kiss his neck. "This is so much better, love. I just want to be close to you." I hug him hard, and kiss him again. "I don't think we need a chair, after all. I just need you."

He chuckles lightly, and kisses my forehead, then pushes himself up on his elbows so he can look down at me in the dim light. "Birdie, I love you so much. I don't understand what's happening, though. Can you tell me what's happening?"

I stroke the side of his face, and think about it. "Oh, you know what? I think I'm going to start my period tomorrow." I give a watery laugh. "I'm probably awash with hormones right now! So that's probably why I'm so weepy and nutso tonight."

"Oh, thank the gods," he says. "I thought I was just fucking everything up today."

I push his bangs out of his eyes and smile up at him. "No, you're wonderful, sweet man." I pause and gaze at him. "You talked about where we should raise our kids, and then you made love to me on the chair I thought I wanted, and in return you got a sad, freaked out, crying girlfriend to deal with." I laugh and sniffle, exhaling hard. "I guess this is nature's way of making sure that you really want to be in a relationship with me, huh?"

He chuckles. "One day per month of weepy Birdie? You're well worth it." He scoots down and kisses me on my sternum, then gently kisses each of my breasts. I run my hands through his hair and start to lightly massage his scalp. He lays his head down on my chest and sighs. "I should probably have a notification in my phone to warn me when it's that day, though."

I sniff again and laugh. "That's a really good idea. I should have that notification, too, so I know why I'm being so crazy." I smile down at him. "And before I got all weird tonight, I really enjoyed today."

He nods. "Yeah. It was a great day!" His deep laugh rumbles through my rib cage. "Oh, did you send Jimin something today? He sent me a weird text."

"Oh, yeah! I was so proud of your gamelan dancing that I sent him a little video. I wanted to send it to Hobi, too, but I don't have his number." I giggle. "What did Jimin say?"

"He just said, 'Oh, you're Indonesian now? Nice moves!'"

I laugh. "I should have asked your permission before I sent it, sorry. But you were busy dancing and I wanted to brag to somebody!"

"It's fine. I'm glad you don't have Hobi-hyung's number, though. He would probably post that on Insta for my next birthday or something!"

I chortle. "Oh, shit, that's right! I'm suddenly remembering that Vlive where he was showing everyone pictures of Jin and JK wearing glasses, and cackling like a crazy person." I laugh hard. "He's a little bit evil, isn't he?"

Taehyung nods and laughs.

_________________________________

When I wake up in the morning, Tae is just starting to stir as well. He hugs me closer and buries his face in my hair. I roll over to face him and wrap my arm around him, kissing his chest.

"Hi, Birdie," he whispers.

"Hi, Tae," I whisper back.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"Right now, when I just woke up?" We both laugh.

"Yeah."

"Sure."

"Are you bleeding now?"

I feel my crotch to check. "No, not yet."

He hums, and runs his hand down to my ass. "Then, can I make love to you properly? I want our last sex here to be a really good memory."

I squeeze him tight. "That sounds nice, babe. And I promise I won't cry this time!" We both chuckle and he kisses me sweetly as he grabs a condom from the nightstand.

We end up experimenting more, starting on our sides, face to face, arms wrapped tight around each other, with my top leg thrown over him. "Oh, this is lovely," I tell him. "It's sex, but it's also a hug at the same time. This is exactly what I needed today!" I plant slow, sloppy kisses on his collarbone and his neck as he gently thrusts.

"Uhhm, I'm so glad. This feels so nice!" he replies, gazing softly into my eyes. As we pick up intensity, Taehyung suddenly sits up, lifting me with him, and settles into a kneeling position with me astride his lap. My arms and legs are wrapped around him, the sides of my feet resting on the mattress. I tremble and whimper as he snaps his hips, driving his dick up into me, and he moans deeply. 

"Ohmygod, yes please, harder, babe!" I gasp.

He grips my waist with both hands, his face in a boxy snarl, eyes closing involuntarily as I clench down around his cock, and he plunges impossibly deep into me. With each stroke my ass is making a slapping sound against the tops of his thighs, and his deep, husky groans sound so erotic that it makes electricity dance up my spine.  

I clasp him closer and he wraps his arms tight around me, pulling almost all the way out now before ramming himself back into me, again and again. My feet curl hard against the sheets. "Please, pleasepleaseplease, please!" I beg. All at once I get the sensation that I am melting into him, that we are becoming a single entity. I scream hoarsely as my body tenses, preparing to climax. Pinwheel galaxies whirl through our fused bodies as I explode down around his cock. He roars as he bucks his hips, erupting into me, his arms squeezing me and his neck arching back gracefully as he comes and comes inside me. Depleted, he exhales shakily, his thighs quivering, and we collapse into each other.

"Oh my god, I'm dizzy, that felt so good, Birdie! I just want to stay like this forever," he pants.

"Yes," I whisper, leaving soft little bites on his gorgeous neck. "Don't leave. Stay in me just like this." 

He buries his hand in my hair and rests his head on top of mine, and we lean against one another as our breathing gradually slows. After who knows how long, Tae starts to chuckle.

I sit up a little and smile into his eyes. "What's funny, my love?"

"I'm trying to figure out how we can get to the airport without having to change from this position," he replies, grinning and leaning in for a kiss.

____________________________________

On the flight home, the flight attendant is a slightly supercilious older guy. He looks quite amused that Taehyung and I share a seat the whole time except for take off and landing. His dry little cough makes me roll my eyes.

We get home, and have to do another ten-day self quarantine. On day three, Tae starts to feel a bit sick, so a manager takes him to the hospital, where he tests positive for covid-19.

I take myself to the hospital the following day, and I test negative. Tae has a low-grade fever, sore throat, and fatigue. The two of us discuss having me stay in a separate quarantine in the guest room, but he needs rest and I know he sleeps better when we can cuddle. I decide to stay with him, but wear a face mask even to sleep.

By the third day, my poor sweetie is feeling kind of miserable, but I keep him supplied with hot tea and delivery orders of samgyetang (chicken and ginseng soup). Once he starts to feel better, and my tests continue to come back negative, his main concern is getting a clean bill of health soon enough to make it to J-Hope's birthday party on Saturday the 19th.