Life sometimes feel like an skyscraper.

You have two choices -- only two. This choices determine your life, your future, your love interest and everything you care for. What if your life can turn dramatic at any given point?

Tell me about it... No I am not going to start with the 'what if' crap or 'have you ever' not going too. I know that everyone's being hurt one way or another. I know that not everyone can be safe. I know that good people are hard to find because we have turn into devils. 

I don't mind it. I can feel my deepest secrets calling to me once again when everything is quiet. They don't stop. We always have them to help us or be our undoing. 

Somewhere, ik somebody loves me. It's hard sometimes to see it when all you want to do is end it. I mean -- why does it matter if I do it or not? Sure, you want to safe me. You think you are being a hero, pathetic. Honestly, I don't care if I live now or tomorrow. I just wish before I go my family can live happy, so I don't regret being a burden. 

I wish you and I, can be together. I wish tomorrow -- doesn't rains. I wish Christmas becomes eternally because when it happens.. I actually exist. Also, who doesn't like snow? It's like freaking beautiful.

Decisions come and go in life. You wouldn't get another chance. It's hard to make a decision. I have always play out my options in my head; however, I have a terrible way of always seeing the worse side of everything so don't trust it. My life is screwed up -- ik. I just started to accept all of my screwiness. I gave up on fixing it a long time ago.

Little girl are good when they shut up -- you want to know what's good too? Stepping up for yourself. Who cares if they think of you as a bitch, slut or so. If you have confident use it. I am not saying go around taking somebody's else boyfriend -- fuck you. If you do. That's not right. 

Going around breaking up a happy relationship is wrong. It leaves an empty feeling in the heart. Even if you do it for revenge -- it never pays. Life is good as you make it out to be.

The decision of your life road is on you. I find it that waking up is a blessing. I am not religious, but it is good to wake up in the morning. Take it from a person that has problems. I want to think of ways to understand life. I want to comprehend it. I want to know so much with so little time around.

just do me a favor, don't give up on life as I did, okay? You are wonderful & special. Even if you don't see it, I do. 

Stay safe out there <3