I was cuddling with Phil on our sofa, watching a movie when the door bell rang. "Phil, you wanna be the best boyfriend ever and get the door?"

Phil answered by getting up, and opening the door. "Dan, it's for you."

I got up to see a young, blonde haired boy standing at the door, holding a piece of paper.

"Dan Howell?" He asked, looking at me.

"Yeah?"

He handed me the paper. "The Judge wants to see you at noon today. Be sure to be there on time. He doesn't like to be kept waiting." The boy then left.

I held the sheet of paper, scanning it. It had directions on how to get to the courthouse. It also told me to present the paper at the entrance.

"Um, Phil?" I asked. "Who's The Judge?"

Phil held my hand as we made our way back to the sofa. "I'm not entirely sure. I've only met him once, and that was when he told me that you were coming here, and where I would find you when you arrived. I think he's kind of like the ruler of this place. But not a ruler, really. You'll know when you meet him. It's hard to explain."

I set down the paper on the coffee table, and went to go and get ready. The entire time I was showering and getting dressed, questions ran through my head. Who was he, what did he want? Did I do something wrong? 

At 11:30 I headed out. "Phil?" I called. "I'm leaving. Love you, Lion."

"Love you, too, Dan."

I walked for fifteen minutes, reaching the courthouse which was on the edge of town. I had never understood why there was a courthouse; after all, we were in a place where everything was perfect. Now I understood.

There was a guard standing at the gate, and I walked nervously up to him. "Hi, um, I'm Dan Howell. I was told to come here at noon?" I handed him my paper.

He looked it over, and opened the doors. "Straight ahead, the last room at the end of the hall. Knock before going in."

I thanked him and walked down the long hallway, looking around as I walked. It was beautiful inside; marble floors, a large, crystal chandelier hung from the ceiling. I reached the large double doors at the end of the hallway, and knocked on the door.

"Come in." I heard a loud voice from within yell.

I pushed open one of the (very heavy) doors, and saw who I presume was The Judge sitting at a desk. He had dark brown hair, and old looking face, but very kind looking grey eyes. 

"I, um, I'm Dan Howell. You asked to see me?" I stuttered awkwardly, still standing just inside of the doors.

The man smiled. "Yes, welcome, Daniel. Please, come sit." He motioned to a chair in front of his desk.

I walked over and sat down, fidgeting with a loose thread on the sleeve of my jumper. "Oh, I was told to give you this paper when I came in." I handed him my summon papers.

He smiled and accepted the paper, placing it in a drawer. "Now, Daniel, how do you like it here? Are you happy in my land?"

I was surprised at first; I thought I was in trouble, not here for small talk? "Oh, I like it very much. It's perfect here! My schizophrenia is gone, I'm with Phil. It's paradise. I have nothing I could possibly complain about."

He gave a sad smile. "Good, very good. It is actually partially on the subject of Phil that I wanted to speak to you today."

"Did Phil do something wrong?"

"What?" The Judge looked surprised. "Goodness, no. This is really about you, but Phil has to do with it, that's all. Back on Earth, you were married to a man named Peter, correct?"

I nodded. "Yes, we had four children together. 

"Well, here in this paradise, you are living with Phil. And here, you will get the opportunity to live the life with Phil that you could have had had he not died."

I smiled. "That's all I ever wanted. To know what life with Phil could have looked like."

"Another things you will notice is that you will not age beyond the age you are now."

"I have no complaints about that."

The Judge chuckled. "Yes, I'm sure. There is one thing, however, and this is why I have called you here today. Peter will not live forever. One day he will come here, when he dies. And when that happens, you will have to choose."

I felt my stomach drop. "What do you mean, I will have to choose?"

He sighed. "While you are here, like I said, you get to live the life you could have had with Phil. When you reach what would be your eighty-sixth birthday, you will have to make the choice. Your life with Peter, or your life with Phil. Whatever you choose, it will become, or remain, reality."

I had a horrible feeling. "And what happens to the other?"

"It vanishes. Forever. It will only live on in your memory. Yes, Peter or Phil will remain here, in paradise, but they will no longer be a part of you."

I couldn't breathe. This, the life of people, reality itself, was in my hands. It was being given to me. I didn't know if I could bare it. "So, what about on Earth?"

"If you would choose your life with Peter, things would remain as they have been. But, if you choose your life with Phil, everything that happened with Peter on Earth will be replaced."

I was angry at this point. "You mean to tell me that I have to choose between Phil, who was my soul mate, and Peter, who became the love of my life?! This is ridiculous! How could I possibly choose?!"

The Judge folded his hands in front of him. "Now, Daniel, I understand why you are angry. This is a very tough decision, but keep in mind you have 60 years to think about this, to make the best decision."

"Yeah, well what about Peter? He's not going to live for 60 years!" 

"Time passes differently here than on Earth. It will feel like 60 years to you, but by the time that passes, it will only be a couple years on Earth."

"Well, explain to me how I'm supposed to tell Phil?!"

"I highly suggest you don't tell Phil. I know you need some time to think, so you may leave, if you would like."

I thanked him, and walked out. 

How could I not tell Phil? Maybe he could help me.

But how could I tell Phil? I mean, what was I supposed to say- "Hey, Phil, guess what? I get to choose reality! I get to choose whether this life we're living is going to be real or just a memory of mine! Could you help me choose between you and Peter, love?"

I realized, that I have to do this all on my own.

This decision, is mine to make.

Mine, alone.