MARINETTE

"My uncle's an ass." I mumble whilst holding an ice bag on Adrien's swollen cheek.

He winces a bit, feeling the coldness of the ice on his cheek. He sneaks a glance at me with no emotion showing on his face. "I'm also an ass." He murmurs.

"That is not true."

"Then why am I disobeying direct orders?" He shoots back, his pupils wavering from left to right. "Why am I also contradicting the general? I should be in jail right now. I should be in trial for treason."

"You are his right hand man." I announce, moving in front of him to look at him in the eyes. "You too are the brains of the mutiny." I softly hold his cheeks to keep his attention on me.

"Why are you still here?" He asks quietly after a while. His eyes searching mine after asking. "You don't have to stay with me-"

"I'm a nurse and you're my patient." I cut him off, now not looking at him in the eye. I move away and start to organize my medical supplies on the rack. "I have to take care of the person I'm assigned to."

"Am I just a patient to you?" He mumbles hoping that I wouldn't hear. On the other hand, I hear every word he said and choose to not say anything. After some moments of silence, he asks me why I'm still a nurse until now.

"You've been working as a nurse even before you reached the legal age to work...why continue until now? You had the chance to leave and live another life; a cleaner and more pure life."

"I was given the chance to have hands like God." I answer, "I couldn't just let what I know go to waste. If I had the chance to keep the lives of people, then I should take it and not let them die at my hands."

Adrien visibly winces with my words and forcibly closes his eyes as he turns his head away from me.

"Hey," I acknowledge his sudden action softly. "What's wrong?"

"Then what do you think of us, soldiers?" He ask in such a soft voice laced with regret. He slowly raises his hands to his eye level. Staring at his palms, I could see sweat running down his forehead. "These hands have killed men and they have no right to be called as pure and clean. You have the work of God whilst I have the hands of the Devil..."

"Adrien."

"It's the truth." He retaliates with a quiet voice I could barely hear. "Don't deny what I'm saying here, Nurse Marinette. Many people died because of me-"

"I'm not denying what you're saying, Adrien." I interrupt him, "I'm aware of the cruel reality that a lot of people died and some are still dying, but it's not you who's doing it." I kneel in front of him and grab his face, gently making him face me. His head turns and eyes me carefully. I caress his cheek and show a small smile at him. "It is your duty. And your duty is to protect what's important to you and this country is important to you. The citizens in this country is important to you-"

"And you're important to me." He stops me mid-speech and my words get caught in my throat. He pulls me close to him and wraps his arms loosely around my waist. He rests his head on my stomach. "You don't have to convince me anymore." He utters.

Still shocked with his sudden display of affection, I am currently having a mind battle if whether I should wrap my arms around him too. So out of the ordinary, I touch his hair- combing it between my fingers, touching some strands of his blond hair.

"Adrien." I mumble. I hear him hum back and I can't stop the smile on my face. Marinette! What the hell are you doing?! "Can you look at me, Adrien?"

Slowly, his head tilts up to face me. I crouch down, going closer to him. I go against everything I'm for once I close my eyes and connect my lips with his.

I hear him intake a short gasp as I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me.

Uncle Hugo will kill me.

My comrades will kill me.

The government will kill me.

Monarch will kill me.

But I don't give a damn at all.

Adrien guides me to sit on his lap without disconnecting our lips in the process. I feel him kiss me back with the same force. The feeling he is giving is making me weak to the knees and I bet that my cheeks are flushing so bad right now. Such soft lips of his were the first to pull away and my eyes open, but are still left in a daze. His eyes peer into mine and flicker to look at my swollen lips.

"It's not just me-" He starts.

"It's not just you." I interrupt him, caressing his cheek. "It was never just you."

He gives me a short kiss on the lips and pulls away again. His mouth breaks off into a grin and lets out a soft chuckle. "I guess I don't have to wait that long."

"I'm sorry, Adrien." I sigh. Despite my longing feelings for you, we still are on different sides.

"You don't have to be sorry about anything, Marinette." He says, clearly not knowing the context of my apology. He grabs my hand and intertwines our fingers.

"I can't promise you anything, Adrien. Like, I know that I just showed that I care for you too. But I can't give you something solid like a...relationship. We're at war and falling for you may or may not have been the wisest decision I've ever made."

"I can say so too." He pauses to kiss my hand. "I can't promise anything to you. But we'll find a way to end this dispute and then we'll get to lead normal lives."

Again, I'm bothered with the fact that we are on opposing sides. Such thought is nauseating. Forcing a smile, I stand from sitting on his lap and let go of his hand.

"Are you oka-"

"You should go to sleep already." I immediately cut him off.

"Marinette, I'm trying to understand what really bothers you."

"N-Nothing's bothering me!" I shake my hand in denial. "I...I'm tired. Where do you want to sleep tonight- at your bunker or here?"

"With you." He replies and he breaks off into a soft laugh. "I'm just kidding. I'll sleep here. It's sometimes nice to sleep once in a while alone in a room."

I grab a blanket from a nearby racket and throw it at him. He catches it with ease and starts to unfold it. "Sleeping with me would be a challenge. I tend to move and drool a lot."

"At least you get to sleep well."

Oh crap. "Oh my goodness, Adrien! Will sleeping in the infirmary trigger any episode? Were you serious when you wanted me to stay with you?" I completely forgot of his disorder. And this is one of the cruel realities of having such an disorder. Even sleeping, a supposedly relaxing activity, is entirely terrifying.

"Mari, you don't need to fret." He assures me with a smile. "You don't have to worry over me. Especially my swollen cheek and illness."

"But-"

"I shouldn't have made you worry. I'll be fine, Marinette. And besides, I told you that I wanted some time alone too. Maybe a goodnight kiss will chase the flashbacks away?" He asks quietly and unsurely. Without any hesitance, I place my lips on his- giving him a chaste kiss before pulling away.

"I'll check on you later, lieutenant." I whisper against his lips.

"And I hope that I'll be sleeping soundly by then, my nurse."

"My nurse?" I ask incredulously.

"Why? Doesn't it sound lovely to the ears?"

"I was going to say 'creepy' actually." I reply with a soft laugh. "But I better get used to it since I am technically yours and you're mine, right?" I feel a blush creeping up my cheeks as I talk to him.

"We're that pair which does not use any labels then. Okay, got it." He nods before turning his back to me and lying back down on the bed. "Good night, Marinette."

"Adrien." I coo whilst leaning on him. "We can't really live up to what the both of us want-"

"It's not that." He interrupts, still refusing to look at me. "It's not that I want to show everyone that you're mine. I feel that you don't like me as much as I do for you. Like, did your feelings start out of pity because of my disorder?"

"You talk like as if you're the only person who has such a disorder, Lieutenant Agreste." I shake my head and sit on his bed. I feel his body turn to face me just as I face away. "And for your information, I've set my eyes on you even before I found out. I also love taking care of you; and from all the nurses here, I'm the only one that can stop an episode of yours. It makes me feel special every time." I'm not given the chance to continue as Adrien forcefully pulls me to lie on his bed. He hovers over me then kisses me. Such sensual tension fills the air as we continue to kiss and he interlaces our fingers together.

"Adrien..." I sigh as he softly kisses moving down my neck. He continues to do it and I bite my bottom lip to suppress myself from laughing or...or moaning- Gosh! Adrien please stop trying to give me a heart attack!

"Adrien," I force myself to say, "we need to sleep already."

He stops his kissing and just stays hovering over me. "Right...sleep. That was what I was about to do." I couldn't stop myself from chuckling as I notice his disheveled hair. He seems to have noticed where my attention is since his mouth turns to a grin. "But would you look at that. How can I sleep when you have that look on your face?"

"What look?"

He brings his face closer to mine, "That look that enchants me every time..."

"You doofus," Using what I learned in our lesson on defense, I push him off me and he falls on the floor with a thud. I hear him groan in pain on the floor. "If I'm sleeping here then you better be sleeping on the bed next to this one."

"Wait! You're sleeping here?" He asks enthusiastically. He climbs on the bed next to mine and looks at me with a wide smile on his face-completely forgetting the pain I caused him when he fell on the floor.

"I think it's the only way for you to sleep well right?" He nods before wrapping himself in a new blanket. I snuggle in the blanket I gave him and it smells just like him. "Well...good night now, for real."

"Good night, Marinette, for real." He closes his eyes and I just stare at the ceiling for some time. I can't allow myself to sleep yet. I have some things to finish- things regarding what the government wants to know about the mutiny.

I look at Adrien on the bed beside me and I can't stop myself from smiling upon seeing him intake deep breaths as he sleeps. "I want this dispute to end just so that we can be together without any prejudice..."

I laugh at myself  and look away from him. "What am I doing? Monarch is so going to kill me..." Immediately, I sit up with a sudden realization. "I have to talk to Monarch." I state.

I get off my bed and fix the blankets and my hair before dashing to the door. Just as I open it, I stop myself from exiting the room.

I just can't leave Adrien like this.

I run back inside and press a soft kiss on Adrien's forehead, "I'll be back, Adrien." I whisper before heading outside to the showers.

-----------------

"This phone better be working." I hiss as I've been hearing the sound of static coming from the radar phone for the past few minutes. After hitting it for countless times, I hear nothing and it's a sign that the phone is operating well. "Oh, thank the heavens above..." I mumble before contacting Monarch.

After minutes of trying to reach him, I am greeted on the phone with a soft 'hello'.

"Monarch!" I exclaim quietly.

"Marinette, you should be thankful that it's my shift tonight. It's nearing three in the morning. You have to make this quick." Although he was trying to put up a scolding front, his voice sounded tired or rather, exhausted.

"How come the people in the mutiny know you?" I ask quietly, going straight to the point already.

"Mari..." He sighs, using my nickname. I know that something is up. Whenever he uses my nickname, I know that the topic is something he wants to avoid by acting pitiful or cute (at times).

"Monarch...you...you have to tell me. How can you expect us here to help you if we do not even know what the situation is? Nath and the others has their initiation 12 days after mine- a lot of us here are now part of the mutiny and we are doing what you want us to do." I pinch the bridge of my nose before continuing, "So I believe that it is your turn to give us something in return like an explanation."

I hear him sigh on the phone and as he hesitates for a while, I wait patiently. "I...I was suddenly promoted. From being just a normal first lieutenant, the leader wanted me to be one of the main generals." He explains everything in one go and I am left gobsmacked.

"And through transparency, everyone knows the generals...including the rebels."

"It is not like as if you can hide who the generals are. I mean, we are exposed to the press when we are ordered to."

"And you are not liking this at all-"

"Because I am one of the main people going against the mutiny." He interrupts abruptly. "I know plans more than any of you and now that they know me, I could get murdered."

"And we won't allow that!" I accidentally exclaim out loud, clearly enraged with the sudden thought of him getting killed by the hands of the rebels. Noticing my mistake, I looked around the shower room and even take the time to look outside, quietly. It's good that I never even turned on the lights in my duration here.

"I can't allow that..." I continue, making sure that my voice is quiet.

"You're letting me hang onto loose hope."

"Monarch, I can't afford to let you die just because of such change."

"The plan of your fake deaths will be executed in two weeks." He suddenly says on the phone, clearly wanting to change the topic. But I'm not allowing him to do that.

"Monarch-"

"Marinette, if you continue caring for me then I would assume more hope on getting you back. And you know how much I want you back." He says it so sternly on the phone but I could hear how sincere that was also. My head starts to pound with the sudden statement and I am left speechless.

My silence is considered as a cue for Monarch to continue, "You will be one of those soldiers who will be deployed to the areas of the rebels. That is when our plan will be executed; right in the middle of your journey, faux bombs will explode causing a distraction. That is a cue to drug someone from the mutiny in order to transport them back easily to our base."

I take my time before asking a question, "And what about our bodies? This base will suddenly realize that some bodies will be missing."

"Fake bodies are being produced at the moment. We have everyone's information right here with us- face features, height, weight- we have everything. We just need you to execute the plan well."

"And then everything else will follow thoroughly like as if it's all real." I continue feeling incredulous.

This means that I have less time to stay genuinely happy with Adrien. I know that he will also be deployed and I know that he will be taken in as a prisoner- a person of interest by the government. I can't choose which is best for me- my longing for Adrien or my duty as a truthful servant to the government? Not only am I fighting physically, but also internally.

"Mari. You have to do this." Monarch's voice breaks me out of my train of thoughts. "You can't bring all of your dad's efforts to waste."

"Monarch...I'm scared." I confess to him.

Monarch and I have been training together ever since we were 14 years old. We started young since we grew up in the government's army base. Our dads worked together as combat medics and I became so accustomed with Monarch always by my side.

And I loved him, I truly did. I grew to love him so much, I couldn't imagine my life without him and he could not also imagine himself without me. And I thought that we had the same thoughts of our future together (maybe even as a family). But we had different ideas. They were so different and selfish, I realized that the both of us were too toxic for each other. I broke things off in the gentlest way (if that was possible). I mean, I had to give him back the engagement ring I've been wearing for more than two years that time.

And now I see him as a friend, just a friend I've known ever since we were kids. But he still sees me as his woman, and I don't like that bit at all. After what he has taken from me, I know that the both of us can never be lovers again.

Two years after, well in present times already, here am I who just kissed another man thinking that I could start anew. How would I have known that that man would have a different point of view, but what's new about me is that...I'm not planning on giving him up.

"Marinette, you don't have to be scared. We trust in you and we know that you would execute the plan well."

I'm not scared about executing the plan. I'm scared that Adrien would misunderstand everything. I want him to switch sides as much as possible. My feelings for Adrien are growing stronger and are stupidly turning into love.

And I don't know if I should feel okay with that at all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hello...

I'm like a phoenix...

I RISE FROM THE ASHES!

'Cuz you know, it's like as if I haven't been alive for a long time since it has been months since this book's last update.

Thank you for waiting! ❤️

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