Women's Health Center of Las Vegas

|Las Vegas, Nevada |

I sat down on the grey cushioned chair inside of the patient's waiting room as nervously tapped my pen against the metal clip of the brown clipboard. My leg was shaking vigorously as I tried to practice deep breathing and keep myself under control.

"You okay ma'am?"

I looked up to see a young brown face woman dressed in blue and white scrubs standing before me, looking down at me with concern.

"Oh...oh yes I'm fine thank you", I stammered as I forced myself to give her a smile.

She grinned and nodded her head. "Just when you finish filling out your paperwork bring it back up front to the receptionist and we will get you seen by the physician as soon as possible okay?", she ensured as she pointed to the front of the waiting room.

I thanked her and nodded as I looked back down at my paper work. All these questions were driving me crazy; how many sexual partners do you have? Are you bi-sexual, homosexual or heterosexual, how many abortions have you had? Are you a drug addict?

"This is insane", I whispered to myself as I scanned over the thick packet of papers.

I closed my eyes as I felt my stomach start turning again. I haven't eaten anything this morning but, I find myself vomiting my life away. It gets to the point that I can't even keep apple juice down. the only thing that helps curb the nausea for a little bit was ginger ale, strawberries and bananas. I think my baby likes fruit.

Damn, I thought to myself as I ran my fingers through my hair. My baby. I...ME...have a little person growing inside of me. I never would have thought I would be sitting here with these issues. Most teens my age is stressing about their up-coming exam, why are all the study rooms in the library reserved and here I am; preparing to do one of the cruelest things to mankind.

Taking the life of an unborn child.

Scribbling quickly, I finished up my documents and walked over to the receptionist desk. I sat the clipboard down on the desk and leaned my elbows as she took the papers off and began to quickly type my name into the system.

"Rhyon Brown", she said as she looked up from the screen with her green eyes.

"Yes?"

"Your all set. Dr. Milagros will be with you momentarily", she said with a small sweet smile on her face.

"T-Thank you...", I managed to get out forcing another fake smile before walking away and sitting down.

I was the only one sitting in the waiting room, besides this older lady and her toddler daughter who was coloring quietly at one of the children's tables in the corner of the waiting room. The TV played Bernstein bears while the television next to it showed advertisement of the clinic and the resources they had to offer.

About thirty minutes later, I felt myself falling asleep to try to keep from vomiting. I spent the first ten minutes walking back and forth to the bathroom vomiting little by little. I guess the nurse felt bad for me so she bought me a canned Seagram's ginger ale from the vending machine that was nearby as well.

"Rhyon Nicole Brown?"

My eyes fluttered opened as I heard my name being called. I looked and seen a tall, fair colored woman with a long sandy brown ponytail tightly pulled back standing in the door way with her lab coat on. She was a pretty young-looking doctor and I can tell she works out.

I stood up slowly, slinging my backpack over my left shoulder as I walked to the door. I didn't feel so good and knowing that I'm going to the other side of this door to do the unthinkable makes me feel even worse.

"How are you?", she asked me as she held the door open for me to walk through.

"I guess I'm okay", I dryly answered as I watched her proceed to walk in front me.

"Okay" she said as she nodded. "Just follow me this way. I'm Doctor Milagros" she said as she smiled over her shoulder at me.

We walked to the end of the hallway into this room that had so many medical instruments. I immediately began to feel uneasy about the whole situation. Ren is probably somewhere happy as hell knowing I'm going to go through with this. But what about me? I'm here alone in this room getting ready to take a life because I wasn't smart enough to make him wrap it up even though I was on the pill.

I sat down on the hospital bed as my doctor took a seat at her computer and began to type fast and grabbing my charts to fill out. She turned in her swivel chair to look at me.

"Rhyon Nicole Brown. Birthday is October 6th?"

I nodded. "Yes"

She grinned a wide smile. "Well your birthday is in a couple days. I'm sure you're really excited about it. you're going to be 18 years old"

"Honestly. I haven't had time to think about my birthday" I admitted. "I been going through so much that I forgot my birthday was in two days", I frowned.

Chills went up my spine as I felt the cool doctor office air chill me to my bone. I am glad that I wore a light jacket, despite how hot it is in Vegas. Dr. Milagros nodded as she began to write down on my charts inside of the beige-colored folder.

"So. Based on what you told the receptionist you are here to get an abortion", she said as she looked at me with concern.

I felt a lump in my throat form as I heard those dreadful words. I hung my head in shame as the tears began to instantly form as if it was on cue. I blinked as the tears dropped onto my thumbs as I twirled them.

"Y-Yes ma'am", I stuttered as I lifted my tear drenched face up to look at Dr. Milagros.

Dr. Milagros nodded her head, trying to understand and I can tell that she did. She crisscrossed her legs and rested her hand on my knee, causing me to look down at her hand then at her.

"Rhyon. I understand that this tough but I need you to answer a few questions first okay darling. Take as much time as you need. I want to make sure that you are going through this procedure for you and only you okay?"

"Okay", I spoke softly while sniffling.

"This is your first time being pregnant correct?"

"Yes. First time and I only had sex with one guy"

"Is he still in contact with you?", she asked me.

I shook my head yes then shrugged my shoulders. Dr. Milagros handed me a tissue for me to blow my nose.

"I mean he called me this morning to see if I was still going to come to my appointment and whatever and he just told me to call him when I'm finished.

"Uh Huh", Dr. Milagros said in a skeptical tone. "So, if you don't mind me asking, where is he? I mean you're here by yourself did he not want to come for support? This is really taking an effect on you as I can see."

"He's back in Los Angeles. He doesn't go to school here"

"Rhyon I just want you to know that this procedure is very serious as someone who is going in for surgery for life threatening issues. I am not trying to scare you or shake you up but this is real life and things can happen. Not saying that it will but I need you to know and understand that this is a serious procedure", Dr. Milagros explained with sincerity in her face.

I nodded and used my right hand to wipe my eye. "I understand."

"And that you are doing this for you and ONLY YOU", she emphasized.

I didn't respond. I coughed a little as I put my tissue into my jacket pocket and nodded, displaying that I understand her loud and clear.

"Okay Ms. Brown" she sighed as she slid back in her chair. "I have the documents right here for you to sign this wavier form for this procedure. Being that you don't have any medical insurance, we provide medical coverage for college students, specifically women between ages 17-25 so you don't have to worry about a bill. Its technically a free surgical procedure but you do have a co-pay of five hundred dollars that's due today"

I sighed a little bit, immediately squeezing my eyes shut as the tears stopped flowing. Ren really made sure he had everything planned so there was no way I could have any excuse not to get the procedure done. I hate him. But I hate me even more for sitting here and listening to this doctor give me the side effects and what to expect before, during and after my abortion.

"As you know or if you don't, I will give you medical sedation and of course you're going to have to undress so I can put your legs on the stirrups and a Registered Nurse and I will place a local anesthetic on to your cervix to numb it."

"Will I feel anything?", I questioned with worry.

"No sweetie. This is why we give you the anesthetic so you won't feel anything. But after, we will prescribe you some antibiotics to prevent infection. You will also or may not experience these side effects such as cramping, nausea, and maybe feeling a little faint, which is why you can stay here for a few hours in our recovery room" she explained to me with a sad but warm like smile. "Lastly, you may experience prolonged bleeding, perforation to the uterus and blood clots."

I winced in pain just thinking about everything she is saying to me.

I rubbed my arm as I listened on. "So, everything I am experience or will experience will be sort of like having a period?"

"Exactly right Ms. Brown"

"Perforation of the uterus meaning?"

"That means this procedure could possibly injure the blood vessels or the viscera, such as your bladder and intestines", she warned. "Like I mentioned before Ms. Brown, this procedure is not long but it can have some life altering changes which is why I want you to be sure about the choice you are making. that it's for you and no one else."

I heaved a long sigh as I ran my hands up and down my legs. "Alright. I guess I'll ...- "I paused as I felt myself ready to cry again. "I'm ready for my procedure."

Dr. Milagros stared at me for a moment before nodding. She stood up and handed me a gown for me to get undress and told me that she will return in five minutes with a nurse from her specialized surgical procedure team. I thanked her as she left the room and I began to get undress.

Never in my life, did I think I would be the one sitting here getting ready to have any abortion. Every piece of clothing, a memory of Ren and I conversation flashed through my mind. Gosh, why did this happen to me. I made careless mistakes, relying on my birth control as If it was 100% going to keep me from getting pregnant.

Once undressed, I sat back on the bed as I heard a knock on the door.

"Rhyon. Its Dr. Milagros and I am with Nurse Lita. Is it okay for us to enter the room now?", she asked on the other side of the door.

"Yes. Its fine", I answered her back quickly.

She stepped into the room with the same nurse that bought me my ginger ale. She came over to me and rubbed my back and ensured me that everything was going to be okay. Nurse Lita began setting up the instruments on the table as Dr. Milagros washed her hands before putting on gloves and getting a lubricant for my belly, I am assuming for an ultrasound.

Once she determined how far along I was. She asked me to lay back and just relax while they gathered everything. I laid on the hospital bed, crying silently as the bright lights beamed in my eyes. I closed my eyes and deeply sighed as I tried to keep myself from hyperventilating.

I NEVER judge women who've had abortions. It's as much a tragedy for them as it is for the baby. I know most of them don't do this for fun and many regret their decision and must live with that guilt for the rest of their lives. I could never imagine that feeling, that guilt, but I guess I think I'm going to learn my lesson and experience for myself.

"Please baby forgive me.", I spoke to myself in a whisper as a tear trickled down my cheek. If its part of god's plan...maybe we can meet again. Dear God, I'm sorry."

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Let me know how you guys feeling !

what you think is going to happen next in this book ?!

Honestly, I was really emotional writing this chapter because this shit happens everyday to us women and the woman who go through this, it does stick with them. That emotional turmoil is no joke.

Nevertheless, Thankyou for reading. I love you all ❤

More coming up soon . Update game poppin ;)👍

❤Shayy❤