51
"So, what questions do you have for me?" Dan questions me as I eat some crackers he had laying around.
I swallow the bits of crackers left in my mouth before speaking. "Who is Alissa?"
His eyes grow wide. "W-What? Wait, Alissa Rogers?"
"Good, you know her." I state as I cross my arms over my chest. I don't know what I was expecting, maybe for him to not panic the minute her name passed my lips.
"How do you know about her?" He questions.
"You don't answer a question with another question." I grow even more curious and try not to jump to conclusions. However, after hearing she always had a hickey on her neck, I don't know what to believe.
There are plenty of other male teachers, maybe it was one of them?
No, those girls said she was always around him. None of the other teachers could be at fault. Considering his reaction right now, I'm sure he knows her pretty well. I wait for him to answer, but he seems so mind blown, and lost in his thoughts.
"Tell me how you found out about her." He avoids my question again, I try to not get angry as he does so. Maybe giving him one last chance before I assume the worst would work. I don't even get why he is freaking out so much, if they did hook up, who cares? The last person to judge him would be me, so why is he acting like Mrs. Wickenburg just asked him?
"Why are you freaking out? Just tell me who she is." I shrug as if it weren't a big deal, maybe seeming calm would get him to spill. "I know you two had a thing, so just tell me."
"What?" He looks shocked as the words pass my lips. "You think we had a thing?"
"Why else would you freak out so much?" I ask in a lowered voice. Wait, if that's not it then what happened?
"Because she's..."He seems so broken as he overthinks. "Dead."
I drop the cracker that was in in my hands. "Dead?"
This was the last thing I expected him to say, it takes me a minute to comprehend the fact that this girl is dead. All those thoughts I had about tracking her down and talking to her go down the drain.
"Yes, she died last year." He sighs as he grabs his head in distress.
"How did she die?" I ask him with hesitance. He looks obviously torn up by this, I shouldn't be forcing him to talk about this so soon. "I mean, if you don't want to talk about then you can say so."
"No, I guess it would be healthier to talk about it." He composes himself before he looks at me with a small smile.
"She used to be in my health class last year. I didn't have her for English, she had another teacher for that. I don't know how to start this story, I'm trusting you, okay?" He sighs as he tries composing himself.
"Of course."
He nods as he begins. "In the beginning of the year. She was just like any other student, I didn't notice her because she never stood out. The first time I really spoke to her directly was when she missed a class and I was lecturing her. She wasn't really paying attention, so I assumed she didn't care. Last year, if you broke a rule you were just sent to detention, nothing more.
"At detention, I really talked to her and I couldn't believe how incredibly down to earth she was. However, while conversing with her I noticed she was distracted. She had the same glint in her eye from when I was lecturing her. So of course, I asked her what was on her mind. " He began his story as if he weren't even talking to me, it feels like he's reliving history again. I don't think feel as though interrupting him is right, so I save my questions for the end.
"She didn't want to talk about it, and I assured her that if she ever needed anything I would always be there to listen to her. She just told me she didn't want to burden me with her problems. Before I knew it, detention was over and our conversation was cut short. I have to say, during that week I wished she'd get into trouble again so I could talk to her.
"The next week, she followed the rules and we didn't talk. She just had this aura about her, I can't explain it at all, I wish you could feel it Omera. All I wanted to do was talk to her." I couldn't help but let my jealousy get the best of me, by comparison I seem horrible. I don't think he would ever talk about me like that to anyone. I'm just annoying and clingy.
"You aren't the best at approaching women." I point out hoping it would make me a bit mad. He rolls his eyes as if he knows I'm trying to insult him.
"Yeah, well it seems women just gravitate toward me so I don't need to work that much. That's what happened with you, you always came crawling to my door." He playfully raises an eyebrow.
"Just continue with your dumb story." I give him a bit of attitude.
"Well, that's exactly what happened. She came knocking at my door during free period. Except, she didn't come over to flirt with me like you." He takes another jab at me.
"You didn't seems to mind." I quickly scramble for a rebuttal.
"Anyways, she seemed so distressed. She told me she had to get something off her chest, and asked if I would listen. I welcomed her in and let her rant. She told me she had been talking to a boy from outside school. He wasn't from Morrison, he was a simple boy who dropped out of college and just lived in the area. She had snuck out to see him plenty of times, and he had recently broken up with her. I was all ears and tried not to seem like I was judging her. I think I did a good job because she let everything out."
"Wait, there's other boys in the area?" I tease him. He doesn't seem too impressed with my eagerness to meet other guys.
"No one can put up with you like I could, so don't even try." He reaches over to pinch my cheek. I poke my tongue out at him.
"You're dumb." I poorly insult him back.
"Well, I believe I'm very smart. Alissa told me she had fell into a crisis and began crushing on some girls at our school. She was confused whether she actually liked them or if she was just hungry for love. I explained to her that attraction works in mysterious ways, maybe testing it out would be safe."
"That's stupid. She was probably heart broken and looking for a way to fix it. Receiving more affection from someone she doesn't even like is the dumbest thing she could do." I disagree.
"That's a great point that I should have realized. However, with my advice in mind everyone knew she had been messing around and having sex. I realized she just grew more depressed as the days continued and I tried talking her out of it. I took her to dinners, bowling, even let her crash at my place sometimes. She seemed truly happy when I was with her and I guess...she fell for me or something." He states with sadness, all hints of playfulness is gone from his tone.
"Who would fall for you?" I try lifting the mood, it works as he rolls his eyes with a small smile.
"Honestly, I have no idea." He states as he looks at me. I giggle slightly at his blunt tone, and he joins me.
"Tell me what happened." I soften my tone, obviously this is where the story goes downhill.
"Before you, I was against any relationships between students and teachers. I saw her as my student who needed a shoulder to lean on, so when she confessed to me I was shocked. Imagine if your best friend confessed that they liked you.
"I let her down easy, and told her we can't be anything more than we are now. I didn't know how to handle the situation, so I just cut off all contact with her. I saw her in class but other than that we never saw each other. That was stupid of me." He stops for a second to prepare himself for the next part of the story. I know where this is going already, especially since taking the first thing he told me about her.
"The next few weeks I wasn't there for her when she had a problem or when she couldn't think. Next thing I know, graduation rolled around and she wasn't there. They..." He pauses, closing his eyes tightly. I reach over to him, resting a hand on his face as he collects his thoughts. I grab ahold of his hands and grip then tightly.
"She died. Killed herself all because of a problem that could have easily been fixed. I'd give anything to just go back in time and fix it for her." He doesn't let a tear slip out of his eyes, he only looks distressed.
I have never seen a man so vulnerable like this. I've never been so close to someone before, I feel important if that makes any sense. No one has ever confessed something so personal to me, not even my own parents.
How the hell do you comfort people?
I pathetically pat his head as if he were a dog. "It'll be okay."
"You're horrible at this." He laughs as he watches me struggle to comfort him.
"Hey, aren't you supposed to teach me, Mr. Howell?" I raise an eyebrow.
"It's quite sad to think I won't be your teacher, and I might not be able to see you as often." He stares at me, making me shiver slightly.
"I'll come visit." I promise.
"It won't be the same, you can't come late at night and make the trip back." He points out in what seems like common sense.
"I don't have to make the trip back." I counter but he only continues to insist that staying here would be better.
"I'll have to go to this school and teach, you won't be here." He pouts but I shake off his attitude.
"We have weekends, I don't mind the trip." I grab my abandoned cracker and begin eating them again.
"But-" he tries protesting but honestly his whole aura is weird right now. I think it'd be better to leave him for now.
"I must get going back to my room for a shower." I say, grabbing all the crackers he had left and a water bottle. He watches me gather all his food, and seems hopeless.
"You really won't stay at this school? Not even for me?" He tries making me feel guilty.
"That's cute, you know I'll visit way more than I need to." I say as I pinch his cheek lightly.
"Thanks for the crackers." I say as I close his door behind me.
______
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: Truyen247.Pro