Omera

I wake up but keep my eyes closed because I didn't want to open my eyes and see Dan. It will only remind me of what a horrible person I am for feeling something for him.

"Omera?" I hear a voice say with a knock. I open my eyes and see that I'm not on the couch where I fell asleep with Dan. Instead, I'm tucked in my bed.

I look at the door and I'm relieved to see it's Ryan and not Dan.

"Ryan?" I say sleepily, rubbing my eyes. I notice my makeup is removed, maybe I did it in my sleep?

"How's it going, sleepyhead?" He says with a chuckle.

"What are you doing here so early?" I ask him, sitting up in bed, he walks over and takes a seat on my bed as well.

"It's actually one in the afternoon, and I brought you some lunch. I didn't know you were asleep still," he says, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Yeah, I guess I was tired. Thanks for bringing lunch." I smile, I lean him and give him a quick kiss,

"No problem. How are you feeling?" He asks me and I sigh, I really needed someone to vent to but I can't tell Ryan. How do I tell my fiancé that I'm torn up about the feelings I have left for Dan.

"I feel fine, just super tired," I reply to his question, he narrows his eyes as if he doesn't believe me.

"Alright," he nods slowly looking into my eyes, I look away. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I feel really good today," I say. He studies me for a minute before speaking.

"Who was here last night?" Ryan asks me curiously. I panic for a minute but quickly compose myself.

I debate if I should tell him about Dan because it's obvious that Ryan knows he was here last night. I wonder how he knows, did Maci tell him? No, she wouldn't do that. My instinct is to keep it from him but I don't think I should lie to him, we're about to get married anyways.

"Well, Maci was here and made some pasta for me but then she invited over an old friend of mine. He was at the boarding school with Maci and I." I partially lie to him but he doesn't seem suspicious.

"Well, I'm assuming this note is from him," Ryan says as he reaches in his pocket and pulls out a small note. He hands it over to me, I open it slowly and read its contents.

Thanks for the talk and I hope you feel better.
-Dan

I relax slightly, no wonder Ryan was pressing me about how I felt. I half smile at the note but then quickly toss the note aside. I get off the bed and walk to the kitchen, Ryan walks next to me.

"Why were you not feeling good?" Ryan question me, we enter my kitchen where Ryan begins to unpack the food.

"Honestly, I'm overwhelmed. Now that we're getting married everyone wants to come back into my life and catch up." I tell him, it's not a lie, it's just not the whole truth and that's good enough for me.

"I understand." Ryan says softly, walking over and hugging me tightly as he kisses my forehead. "It's all going to be okay in the end, Omera. I promise you."

I feel a ton of stress lift itself off my shoulders and I melt into Ryan's embrace, it actually calms me down a ton and I feel happy knowing he cares.

"Thank you," I whispers as I smile softly. He let's go of me and I give him another kiss on his lips which visibly makes him happy. He nods at me before walking over to the food, to finish unpacking it.

"I didn't know you went to boarding school. Which one?" He asks me casually, I sigh as I grab the plate of pasta from him. I've been eating way too much if this lately.

"Gwen Allen's." I tell him and he looks at me in surprise. Oh no, does he know about it? The embarrassing thought of being spanked and locked in attics runs through my mind. Not to mention that it's now closed down.

"No way. I went to Morrison." Ryan says with his mouth open slightly in surprise.

Morrison Boarding school? That was the school for all the guys, I remember the camping trip with that school and wondered if Ryan was there. There's now way, he was five years older than I was.

"You're lying," I say in disbelief but he shakes his head.

"I'm not." He shakes his head, he studies me before speaking again.

"I heard a lot about Gwen Allen's, is it...is it true?" He asks me.

"What do you mean?" I say, trying to avoid the question. He presses on though, I don't want to tell him what went on, it's uncomfortable and illegal.

"I heard it shut down because they were abusing the kids." He tells me, his stare is intense and I avoid it. "Did you get abused?"

"No." I smile quickly, I try to relax but I can't keep my hands from shaking as I ate the pasta. Ryan seems to notice this and sighs.

"Don't lie to me," he states.

I feel a big lump in my throat and a sinking feeling in my stomach, it gets too much. I try shoveling down more pasta in hopes that it would get rid of the lump in my throat.

"It's really nothing, it was a regular old boarding school and..." I try to lie but for once in my life I couldn't come up with a good enough lie.

"You're shaking." Ryan points out in concern, I feel my vision blur with tears and clench my fork to try to get it together. Then I feel Ryan's arms wrap around me and his grip unraveled all the hidden emotions within me.

"I hated that place," I tell him in a shaky voice, he runs his fingers through my hair in an attempt to calm me down but I feel myself sink.

I didn't know how much going to that school traumatized me.

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