The guilt finally catches up to me and I finally accept that I shouldn't have gotten drunk.

From everything I can remember, I've always been disappointing everybody. I was never just enough, which is why I always make sure to work twice as hard.

Penelope has told me over and over, that it doesn't matter, but I feel like I need to prove myself.

And now I had gone and done this. How disappointing. I can already hear my mom berating me.

I shouldn't be thinking of that, but I can't help it. I should focus on just healing, so that I can get back to work. Not that I can do much about it anyway.

I had a minor surgery the day before, and the fact that I am not in pain proves that it went well.

I insisted that Luis had to do the surgery or I wasn't going through with it.

It was a little embarrassing when he said he was already going to do it, and there was no need for me to get worked up.

My God, it's like every time I think of him, the size of my crush on him doubles over.

"Oh, you're awake," said the same nurse who had tried to give me food just a few days ago. "I'll go get Doctor Garza."

"Wait," I'm actually a little nervous. "What's your name?"

"Ruth," she says looking a little surprised.

"You look lovely, Ruth." I tell her.

"How flattering, thank you," she says while smoothing her hands on her scrubs.

I hope she doesn't think I am flirting with her. I just usually run my mouth a lot.

"Uh... I don't mean–"

"The crush you have on Doctor Garza is painfully obvious, don't worry about it," she answers before I can finish.

I almost swallow my tongue. "How..."

"Quite a handful of people have a thing for him," she says. "Which is why he likes to work with me," she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm more interested in another doctor he works closely with though, she makes my organs... ugh never mind."

I smile widely. "I know how you feel! So as two comrades in the struggle, give me some tips."

"I don't know..." she starts.

"Come on, help me out," I insist and she sighs.

"Dr Garza is a difficult one to read. He's actually obsessed with his work," I listen with everything I have. "No one can tell what he's thinking... and there's the fact that he never gets personal."

"He must find me irritating then," I tell her.

"Weirdly, no," she said. "But it isn't allowed for doctors to have relationships with their patients."

"What? Who the fuck made that rule?" I ask, then remember my foul language. "Sorry."

The door suddenly opens and the man I am going to marry gets in.

"Luis!" I try not to look guilty at the fact that we were just talking about him.

"Aidan," he says calmly. "You look lively. That's good."

"I missed you," I blurt out.

Everyone in the room stops, including me. It's so tense in the next few seconds that I want to swallow back my words.

That was until Luis' expression morphed into a smile. "I guess... I missed you too."

Ruth lets out a breath, so do I. Even with all the butterflies swarming inside me.

After that, Luis checks up on me as I try not to break out in sweat. As I try not to make it a point of inhaling his scent.

In the next few weeks, the casts come off.

It is quickly becoming my worry that I am getting better everyday.

I've been using crutches to make a few movements here and there, but today I am supposed to try again and walk on my own.

The other two times I did, were really unsuccessful but all I can can remember is Luis' voice in my head saying 'baby steps'.

I also think about the horror that I could have lost my legs just like that. It was high time I took my life more seriously.

My legs are shaky as I try to walk. I honestly just hope I don't look stupid in front of Luis.

I'm actually doing much better than before, but they are just a little wobbly.

The goal is to walk back and forth and back again to where Luis had shown me.

The last walk is the hardest, but I don't know why I'm so determined to prove a point. I start to feel sweaty as I try harder.

But no matter how hard I try, I still can't do it. No matter how much I curse my self internally.

I can't take the last step and I fall forward. It is going to hurt like hell, but there's nothing I can do to stop the fall.

That is until I hit a hard chest instead, and a strong hand wraps around me, supporting me.

My hair is continuously smoothed back as my heart flips ten times over.

"You did great Aidan," Luis says. "You did great, I'm so proud of you."

I feel the biggest lump suddenly wedged in my throat. I try to hold it in but my eyes decide to act on their own and get wet.

I can't stop the tears that begin to fall.

Luis holds me tighter and continues to run a hand down the back of my head. Somehow it makes the crying worse.

But I feel warm, and safe. I don't ever want to leave his arms.