Sans: NYEH HEH HEH

Sans: I WENT ON SANS' COMPUTER HELLO HUMAN

You: Heyo :D

You: How are you?

Sans: IM FINE THANK YOU

Sans: HOW ARE YOU?

Sans: HAVE YOU HAD A GOOD DAY?

You: I guess yes

You: how bout you?

Sans: OH YOU KNOW I SPENT THE DAY IMPOSING As my younger brother

Sans: ha u fell for it

You: what

Sans: I'm boneboy hi

You: ha what

You: oh wait

You: OOOOOHHHaHohOHOHHHH

Sans: yesh

Sans: So hoW WAs YOur DayY?

You: IT WAS FINE

You: IDK Didn't do much

You: just went job hunting again

Sans: and?

You: nothing again

Sans: Sucks

You: u suck yourself

Sans: AND YOU SWALLOW

Sans: *puts on glasses*

Sans: *explosions*

You: I FUCKING SNORTED I DIDNT EXPECT THAT

You: HAHAHAKDFSJ:KLF

Sans: *bows*

You: SO how are you

Sans: meh

Sans: dunno I'm kinda sick I dunno

You: don't go being sick on tour

Sans: ok mom

You: tch

You: how do skeles even get sick

Sans: well

Sans: wait

Sans: okay

Sans: uh well idk I just get sick like humans?

You: well what do you do with sick chemicals

You: I mean, if you can't helium or curium

You: then you barium

Sans: are you suggesting something

You: I just might

Sans: well shit i'll get the shovel

Sans: I just have some kind of virus don't worry i'll just swallow some pills or something

You: ugh viruses are so fucked up. Like they aren't even alive and their only purpose in life is to kill.

Sans: I know

Sans: they  make me sick

You: l...........................................................

You: ....................................................................

Sans: I know you love me

You: well what if I don't

Sans: then you could barium me

You: shit

You: meh too much work ily

Sans: HEHEHE

Sans: nice

Sans: you're my vertebae now

You: do you say that to all girls who you meet online

Sans: only the cool ones

You: :dddddd

You: lets have a deep conversation

Sans: k

You: If you had to describe the whole human race in 3 words, what would that be

Sans: ok uh

Sans: Human, capableofdoingthings, tits

You: *snorts*

Sans: *applause*

You: 'tits'

Sans: HALF OF THE HUMAN POPULATION IS FEMALE?????

You: shit that's true

Sans: Okay would you rather be able to say 100 words or day or wear oven mitts for the rest of your life

You: uh

You: 100 words

Sans: why

You: well I don't talk much anyway, and I cant type with oven mitts

You: also its hell with oven nmitts in summer

Sans: true

Sans: I'd do the same

You: Would you rather freeze or burn to death?

Sans: wowuh

Sans: uh

Sans: Burn?

Sans: dunno

You: rip in advance

You: I'm actually a stalker

Sans: ha

Sans: well shit

You: i'd choose freeze bc you'll pass out when  you hit a certain point, unlike the fire

Sans: well fuck

Sans: okay

Sans: Would you rather have sex with your cousin and no one knows, or everyone thinks you had sex with your cousin, but you didn't

You: oh god uh

You: uh

You: I guess that everyone thinks?

You: I honestly give no shit what people think about me so yay

Sans: nice

You: OKAY

You: HAHAHA

You: Would you rather be a virgin forever or have sex with your brother 2 times a year

Sans: EW

Sans: EW NO NOT PAP

Sans: I don't wanna destroy pap's innocence, so I choose the virgin option

Sans: ha

You: ur such a good brother

Sans: ikr

Sans: welp

Sans: what now

You: dunno lmao

You:  did mtt came over with other weird shirts

Sans: nope

Sans: he did came over though

You: what did he do

Sans: oh he only came to meet his PAPY DEAR OEHHH

You: OOOHH DARLLIINNGNGNGNNNNN

Sans: OOH YESSSSSSSSS

You: SANS SENPAI DARLING YESSSSS

Sans: HAHAHA

You: sanspai

Sans: SANSPAI AND FLESHGIRL MAKING OUT EXPLIT DVD GET IT NOW ITS ONLY 99.99 DOLLAR

You: WOW WHAT

Sans: HAHA WAHT NOTHING

You: OKAY WHAT

You: ha

Sans: 11 DAYS JSKL:DFJ:SL

You: nice change of subject

Sans: ikr I'm so smooth

You: where can I meet you though

You: at the festival I mean  

Sans: i'll probably be in the cafeteria

Sans: at the show you will come there will be a cafeteria yay

You: nice

Sans: I bet Pap will be making spaghetti

Sans: he doesn't know anything else than pasta recipes

You: lolol

Sans: And undyne's going to be one of the security guards

Sans: Basically, a lot of people who were in the royal guard, are gonna be security guards for mtt and the tour

You: nice nice

Sans: OH BY THE WAY

Sans: I began watching harry potter

Sans: I have had no sleep and I was watching the half-blood prince until I saw It was 7 o'clock so yay

You: dude

You: you have watched that many movies in one sitting

Sans: yes

You: jesus how do you do that

Sans: well

Sans: coffee?

Sans: idk I should sleep lmao

You: YES YOU SHOULD

You: I MEAN LIKE

You: WHAT

Sans: same same

Sans: i'll go sleep

Sans: only 11 days before I'll slytherin you

You: that was the worst joke I've ever heard sleep affects your jokes

Sans: I guess

Sans: I'll sleep

You: ok ok ok

Sans: yas

You: OKAY BYE AND SLEEP WELL BONEBOY

Sans: BYE FLESHGIRL

You: Tomorrow same time?

Sans: do you really have to ask?