THE CITY LIGHTS BLOCKED THE STARS. That was one of the reasons why Carrie disliked the city.

She looked up through her glasses and breathed out a sigh of disappointment.

The sky. The sky in the city seemed sad to her. Bright artificial lights overpowered the subtle glow from the twinkling stars, dark wisps of clouds barely visible. The city's yellowish moon a curved frown. It was saddening to see.

'This is nothing compared to what I see at home', she thought, the autumn night's wind forcing her to tug at her jacket. 'It was warmer there too'.

Glancing around, she noted that everyone in the street didn't seem to take notice of the lack of stars. The city folk rarely notice these things. For them, there is no time to appreciate the sky in a place with a million other distractions.

Sighing, Carrie hailed a cab. "To the Dermount Hospital, please", she said, pulling her phone out of her purse as soon as she got in.

No new messages.

Strings. Strings pulled at her heart. Like tendrils of disappointment tugging deep insider her chest. She had long decided to ignore them, for they only lead to her doing foolish things. Foolish things that usually end up with her getting hurt.

Tonight, she recognized the strings bothering her was disappointment. She wasn't sure if it was directed at her, her ex, the world or her mother.

Biting her lip, she allowed the comforting hum of the car to waver her uneasiness. She tucked her phone away and started eating the fries she had bought. The saltiness of the fries reminding her of the home-made ones she used to make with her brother.

'Mom', she thought, her mind a million lightyears away. 'When can we go home?'

~~~~

Familiar jazz music welcomed her as soon as Carrie stepped into her mother's hospital room. The smell of rubbing alcohol and coffee enveloped her and she had to choke back a sob.

'This feels like home', she thought, sucking in a breath. 'An unfamiliar home'

"Baby", her mother's voice made her heart do something. Carrie sure what that something was yet.

"Hi Mom", she greeted, forcing a smile as she shrugged off her jacket. "I brought your favorite fries and burger"

Her mom's face lit up with delight. She pointed towards the table by the TV. Carrie smiled when she saw her mother was rewatching one of her favorite Korean dramas.

"Place it there with the doughnuts your brother brought a while ago. I would suggest you try some-", she laughed, her brown eyes glittering like stars. "But I know how much you dislike Bavarian Donuts"

Carrie rolled her eyes but obliged, placing the food she had brought on the table, and then sat down by Ruby's hospital bed.

She hugged her and let out a shaky breath when she felt how frail her mother was. Burying her head in her mother's dark brown hair, she let herself pretend that they were back at her hometown.

She pictured her mother coming back from a late night shift and despite her exhaustion, would still bake cookies for her and her brother, Nicolaus. She wanted to go back to that time. She missed those years.

"I missed you", she whispered. She wasn't sure her mother heard her.

After pulling away, her mother looked up at her. Then -not to Carrie's surprise- launched into a barrage of questions about college, her life, her eating habits and of course, her love life.

Carrie entertained these questions, saying that college has been fine (despite the pressure she felt because she was to declare her major at the end of the year); that she is living okay in her apartment (despite how noisy she finds the city ); and that yes, she still drinks her milk every day.

"Seriously?", her mother grunted, raising an eyebrow. She waved a hand dismissively. "No juicy campus gossip? Steamy encounters with your floor neighbors? -"

"Mom!"

"I bet you still haven't even let anyone read that novel of yours- "

"It's not done!", Carrie exclaimed, her otherwise pale face turning red. "And I haven't even touched it after how many years!"

Ruby frowned, before sighing. She placed her hand over her daughter's a sad look in her eyes.

"Carrie you can't keep being in your comfort zone. I know you miss how easy home was and how you dad- "

"Stop- ", she choked, looking at the floor. She pushed her eyeglasses up before they could fall. "You know I don't like talking about this stuff. It's uncomfy--"

"But you've got to take some risks honey. I won't be here forever", Ruby continued before her daughter could protest. "Playing it safe is great and all but you're missing out opportunities to be happy. Remember that magazine that you wanted to work at?"

"I had no chance in getting that job. I didn't want to get my hopes up for nothing", Carrie mumbled, avoiding her mother's sad eyes.

"You could've atleast tried. Honey, you are so strong after everything you've been through but it's not right. I wish that Bryan of yours would talk some sense into you--"

"He's not mine anymore. We broke up. He cheated on me"

The silence that followed made her fidget in her seat. She refused to meet her mom's eyes. Her glasses clouded over, suddenly blurry from a few stray tears. She didn't remember giving them permission to fall.

"Oh honey-"

Carrie sighed, shrugging. She hoped the lump in her throat wouldn't be noticeable when she talked.

"It's fine mom. He was a bad influence on me anyway"

But that was a lie.

She was getting too attached to him. The strings in her heart had pulled so strongly back then that she got scared and ran away. On the night of his birthday though, she decided she would open up. Take a risk again and let him into her heart.

Until she saw that he had let himself into someone else's arms.

But that was okay. Atleast she had kept her cool when she broke up with him infront of everyone. She wished she had that cool right now. But her head was pounding like a deranged metronome.

"Hey Ms. Lee--"

The two turned to the door to see a boy staring at them with shocked eyes.

"Oof sorry", he said, smiling sheepishly as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Didn't mean to interrupt"

Ruby let out a sigh of relief. "Ethan, glad you could join us. This is my daughter Carina, but you can her Carrie-"

"You?!", Carrie exclaimed, jumping to her feet. Her mouth trembled, words spilling out as inconsistent as water from a broken faucet. "You're- but-- what the fu--"

Her mother gave her a sharp look to shut her up and glanced at Ethan in confusion.

"Excuse me? You know each other?"

Ethan laughed, blue eyes glittering like light reflecting on the blade of a knife. Carrie found blue eyes pretty, but his reminded her of blue stars. The hottest, and most dangerous stars. She had stared at those eyes once upon a time.

She knew them too well.

"We've met", he said, giving her a smirk as he started towards them.

Memory. The boy in front of her triggered the strings, but this time not the strings in her heart.

The strings in her mind.

Dangerous strings slithered to Carrie's head, tugging restlessly into her memories, drawing them out. She felt like something was being pulled from the ocean in her mind. She forced it down but it rose up like a floatation device.

Her mouth opened but no words came out.

"She owes me a drink"

He winked and she felt her memories resurface.

~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hi! Hope you liked Chapter One. Chapter 2 will come soon (when I find time).

Here's a better picture of this books cover. Made it myself (most of the photos aren't mind tho). What do you think of it? Tell me what you think in the comments!

Alsooooooo...

Have a nice day!(｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

STAY AT HOME & STAY HEALTHY EVERYONE