It was a day she always knew would eventually come, and yet it didn't happen like she had ever expected it to.

A call from Steve startled her awake in the middle of the night.

"Steve wha-"

"There's been an accident, Natasha." He interjected firmly.

She sat up slowly, the annoyed look in her eyes and face vanished. She slowly pushed a strand of red hair out of her gaze unable to find words. Her silence, she assumed, would suffice as an indication that she was ready for Steve to continue.

"Barton's in surgery. He was in an automobile wreck earlier this evening, while driving home from SHIELD's Airfield."

Steve spoke slowly, but to Natasha every word sped by her, each devastating revelation hitting her with the speed of a jet. Steve ran his mouth, and while hit voice was calm, he was unable to soften the blows.

"He was on country back roads. The roads were icy, and there was another flipped car. EMS didn't arrive fast enough, and he's in critical condition. He was helicoptered to the nearest hospital when he was finally found."

"Who else knows?" She managed to ask.

"I mean, I just got here but apparently he's been in the OR for hours now and-"

"Steve, who else knows about Clint?" She asked.

Her words were perceived by Rogers in a tone as cold as ice. Exhaling slowly, the overwhelmed and yet evasive soldier finally spoke, defeatedly.

"Fury didn't want me to tell you. No one else knows."

Outraged, Natasha yelled,

"You didn't think to call his family first? Laura must-"

"Natasha."

She couldn't remember a time where Steve's voice sounded so heavy, and cold. The shock of the severity of his tone silenced her.

"Natasha..." His voice softened and trailed, almost like an exhausted exhale. One last breath of defeat.

She lowered her gaze, and gripped the phone tightly as Steve finally said through a broken voice, almost unable to muster the words,

"They don't think he's going to make it."

-

By the time the five of them were sitting in those hard plastic chairs in the midst of long white halls, the bustling stream of the hospital corridors was silenced. The light brown coat Laura had been wearing was draped over Lila's form as she laid on her mother's lap asleep. A lowered head and unkempt brown hair concealed the face of Cooper. Laura sat between the two, her gaze lowered towards Lila as she stroked her hair weakly.

Cradled in Laura's other arm, swaddled in a blue blanket, was young Nathaniel Barton. Still too young to understand the pain his siblings, mother, and namesake felt - Natasha both envied and pitied him. He may never have to live remembering the pain of tonight, the long hours they had waited, the look in his siblings' and mother's eyes when she told them. He felt no pain now, but Natasha knew he may end up living his whole life without knowing his father.

Laura's eyes had dried by now. They were still brimmed pink, and gleaned with fatigue and pain, but she put on a small, even if hopeless, smile for her children. Natasha could not bring herself to do the same. When she stole a glance at Cooper's slumped form, she soon realized, her solemn attitude was contagious.

The halls were dark, for it was the wee hours of the morning now. Laura's attention never faltered, even if she looked exhausted, the woman never dozed off. Natasha couldn't blame her, even if she was tired enough to sleep in such a cold and uncomfortable setting, she would never be at ease enough to sleep. For like Laura, they could not sleep knowing time could be missed, and then just like that, it could be over.

The two women could not sleep, knowing they could wake up to the news they both dreaded.

-

The man who walked out to them hours later was not who Natasha expected to get news from. Steve walked up slowly to them, his gaze softening and saddening at the sight of the Bartons. Laura looked up from where she laid a gentle hand on Lila's head, and her tired gaze met that of Steve's as he kneeled down next to her.

"Mrs. Barton, I'm going to stay with your kids while you and Nat talk with the doctor."

When Steve sent them down to the lulling depths of the ICU, Natasha knew no good news waited for them below. In the elevator that descended slower than the rising of the sun, one look at Laura's misted eyes, and she knew that she understood the reality as well.

The doctor brought them into a darkened room, separated from the view of dying patients, sparing them the visualization of what he had to tell them. To Natasha, the conversation was torn up, and scattered in her mind.

"Mrs. Barton, your husband was a hero...his service as an Avenger...we can't thank you enough for your sacrifice...this was an unfortunate accident...we did all we could...life support...can keep him on for a certain amount of hours....organ failure...internal bleeding...lost too much blood...I'm so sorry...brain dead."

Laura's cheeks were brushed with slow streams of tears. Natasha only stared at the doctor, her gaze dead and unforgiving. The doctor rushed to comfort Laura naturally, as the soon-to-be widow buried her head in her hands and sobbed. Natasha continued to stare unseeing as the scene unfolded. The only thing to comfort her, was the sensation of her chest caving inwards.

-

"Do you want me to bring the kids down?" Natasha asked.

Laura looked into the dark isolated room, and shook her head slowly. Bringing her hand to her chest, as if it ached beneath her touch, she said,

"No. They are so young."

She looked into the room again, and continued with a soft yet heartbroken voice,

"And have such fond memories of him. I don't want them to see him like this."

Natasha nodded slowly, and without another glance back at her, went back upstairs to Steve.

Looking up, Steve saw in her face that she knew.

"Natasha" he said in a voice so exasperated and soft, it was like a breath.

She shook her head firmly. She didn't want to be comforted, or pitied.

"Laura's with him," is all she said, as she took a seat beside Steve.

Steve only nodded, as he looked slowly from the slumbering kids to Natasha. Natasha noticed Steve cradled little Nate in his arms, but as soon as Natasha met Steve's gaze, the soldier slid the baby into her own arms.

Under any other circumstances, Natasha would have resisted. She had yet to hold the child without the presence of his parents. But she knew she was the closest other adult Nate had to family, and she knew of all moments, even if Nate didn't realize it himself, he needed what remained of his family. She felt powerless holding the infant softly in her arms, as she knew downstairs his father was kept breathing only by machines. Who was she to comfort the infant in such a time, and yet she knew she could do nothing else.

Time passed slowly, but soon Natasha focused on nothing but the child as she rocked him slowly in her arms. Her head was tilted down towards him, her green eyes softened and her humming tone sweet as she kept him calm. Little soft tufts of light brown hair looked too much like his father's for her chest not to ache. And when the baby opened his sleepy eyes for just a second, Natasha almost froze as she remembered the first time she saw those same grey blue eyes, and the last.

But her arm eventually loosened again, and as the child drifted into a pleasant dream, she brought the child closer to her. Feeling the warmth of his little body pressed against her own chest, she leaned down and kissed the forehead of her best friend's son.

-

She stood alone outside that isolated, cool, dark room. Her arms wrapped around herself as she stared unseeing at the bustle of the ICU around her, she stood alone, with not even Steve with her this time.

Laura had said her goodbyes, and now her and Steve would bring Clint's children home and explain that he couldn't be saved. She couldn't save him, nobody could. Not now.

The same doctor brought back a set of papers, which already had Laura's signature on them. Flipping through the papers and charts, Natasha read what she wished she could forget. She knew Clint was an organ donor; he wanted to save a lives even after he died. But she knew this last wish would not be fulfilled, for nearly all of Clint's organs were failing.

A young light haired nurse emerged from the dark isolated room that Natasha stood outside of. Slowly, she approached Natasha and with a sad nod said,

"You can go in, when you are ready."

Natasha knew she never would be, but she ended up by his side seconds later nonetheless.