I beamed at myself while staring at my Dholki Dress, it was blue with some gold trimming super simple yet so pretty! 

Today was Javaria's Dholki, a Dholki is part of the celebration and is celeberated a week or two before the mayoun. The dholki consists of only the bridal family like close friends, reletives etc. Some people bang on a Dhol drum while the rest of us sing and stuff. 

Rabia, Soojin, and Sabha all come in to the room wearing matching blue dresses as me, we all decided to twin. Javaria and my aunt decided who to invite and for some reason Roofa and Alayna also got to be part of it and obviously they rejected my friends. 

I had to beg them to let them come, and my aunt also said no. But I did some extra work and she finally said yes. I was excited since this was my first wedding in Pakistan, i had been to 2 weddings before both in Canada. My parents used to smile and tell me about the weddings in Pakistan.

No, don't be sad now Rayyana. They wouldn't want that. 

"We look amazing!" Sabha said squeezing my shoulder, I smiled and leaned into her "We do don't we?" Soojin looked at me "This is your first wedding in Pakistan right?" I nodded smiling. 

After I was legally handed to my aunt she unfortunately made me start going to school, and it was hard since I don't know to read or write Urdu so my teacher moved me to the English section and I passed with flying colors. 

That's where I met Soojin, Rabia, and Sabha. At first, they weren't nice to me but then they slowly started opening up after hearing my story. 

"Okay, come on let's go!" Rabia grabbed my hand and dragged us downstairs where the Dholki was being held. I smiled as I saw my cousins Sameen, and Samrah. Maheen appi couldn't come because after her marriage she went to America.  And Faisal bhai couldn't come because he was in Canada. 

I said my salam to them and really wandered around staring at the guests. I didn't know half of these people but still said salam to every one of them making sure not not mess up. My aunt strictly said "This is Javaria's night, no messing up!" I sat down with the girls on the floor and other girls around our age sat down and we started banging on the drum and singing songs.

I mostly just sat there clapping since I didn't know half the songs, I felt something stuck in my throat as I remembered my first Dholki. It was Faisal Bhai's wedding and my mom told me we would be attending his wedding and this was the first wedding that included all the traditional ceremony's. 

My mom sat down on the floor singing along with the other auntie's while me and Humna watched. 

I blinked back the tears and smiled while clapping along to the songs. Soon, my aunt announced it was time to eat. Soojin, Rabia, Sabha and I all grabbed plates and stood in line to get food. I had piled tandoori and Chicken Biryani on my plate and was about to sit down when an Aunty came up to me smiling. 

"Assalam-O-Alaikum Aunty." I politely said Longley staring at my seat, "Walaikum assalam beti, kesi ho?" I smiled back at her "Mein teek ho, ap kesi hai?" 

"Gee main be theek ho, ap ke papa Arshad te na?" I frowned at the mention of my father " Gee." I awkwardly said. The aunty called a few others over and I gulped. 

This was bad. 

"Ye Arshad ke beti hai!" The other aunty's stared at me and I suddenly felt self-cautions. "Oh you poor thing, bathanahi kesi ye rarehogi." I don't know why but that little comment made me defend my dad "Alhumdulillah, mein teek ho, boht ache say rarahe ho mai." 

The aunty's frowned at my sudden burst. "Acha sorry beta, both duk howa tumhari leye." I smiled at them "Thank you." And got the heck out of there. 

I sat down with a huff "What happened to you?" Soojin said her mouth full with tandoori, I shaked my head angrily "Aunties." 

I sighed as I cleaned up the kitchen checking the clock, 3am. I sighed and was about to head into my room when I heard a "Rayyana." I looked back to see my aunt furiously staring at me. 

"I told you not to create a scene." I raised an eyebrow "I didn't?" 

"Oh really? Then why was everyone talking about your dead parents?" My breath hitched and I took a step back. Those nosy auntie's must have been talking about them. "I..." I didn't know what to say.

"I told you not to create a scene! Now look at you, hopeless." My aunt tutted and I felt my fist clench. 

Sorry mom and dad but I have to do this

"Aunty please, he wasn't only my father but your brother too. And my mom, you yourself hand picked her so why do you hate her?" I could feel my voice rising by every second. My aunt stared at me in shock "How dare you? don't you know how to talk to your elders? did your mom not teach you anything?!"

"My mom taught me very well how to talk to elders, but my dad taught me to confront someone when they are wrong. Please do not forget that my father was and still is your younger brother whether you like it or not. You guys are related and he loved you, he was ready to do anything it took for him to do for you and you didn't even glance at him once." 

I wanted her to feel the love my dad had for her, the love he said he couldn't let go when I confronted him. I remember telling him "Dad, why do you love her? She may be your sister but she doesn't treat you as her brother." 

My dad gently smiled at me and took my hand "Beta remember this, ALLAH swt loves the people who forgive." 

"He was never my brother, not now not ever." My aunt said looking to the ground. I felt tears roll down my cheek "Do not talk about your parents or else you will be banned from the wedding."  She mumbled and left for her room.

Papa, ye hai ap ke behan. 

Urdu Translation-

Assalam-O-Alaikum Aunty-Hello Aunty

Walaikum assalam beti, kesi ho?-Hello child, how are you? 

Mein teek ho, ap kesi hai?- I am fine, how are you?

Gee main be theek ho, ap ke papa Arshad te na?- Yes, I also am fine, your father was Arshad right?

Gee-Yes

 Ye Arshad ke beti hai!-This is Arshad's daughter! 

Oh you poor thing, bathanahi kesi ye rarehogi."-Oh you poor thing, I wonder how she's living. 

Alhumdulillah, mein teek ho, boht ache say rarahe ho mai-Praise god, I am fine I am living very peavefully

Acha sorry beta, both duk howa tumhari leye.- Okay, sorry child I am very sad for your loss.

Papa, ye hai ap ke behan.-Dad, this is your sister 

I am very sorry for the choppy Urdu, I can speak fluently but I cant write it fluently.