A million words would not bring you back. I know because I tried. Neither would a million tears, I know because I cried – Anonymous

I plead. I beg. Words spill from my lips. My limbs tremble. My lips wobble. Gone. The word that breaks my heart. Along with another. Dead. A final word leaves my mouth, my throat raw from bargaining with the universe. Begging for it to return what it took. Denial gives way. Acceptance takes its place. 

For the first time since I heard, my eyes well with tears. Salty trails that roll down my cheeks. Liquid sorrow curls around the crevice of my nose. Other tracks lead the liquid down, down, down. Crystal clear droplets drip from my chin into my lap. My neck coated in sorrowful tears. My face, flushed and damp.

Yet just as pleading did not sway the universe, neither do the tears. And they never will. That is the natural order. And yet that does not heal me. I still feel as if I am being ripped apart. As if the core of my being has been torn from my body and nothing put in its place. They say time heals. I hope it does, because that is the only thing that could save me from this unending torture. Because the one I lost will never come back. Just like my childhood. My foolish hope in the fairness of life. A fairness that does not exist. A fairness that never existed.