The Present 

There was music blasting through the university windows. It was Pride and the students were going all out. I didn't care for it much, but it was nice to see my classmates and teachers smile.

A friend tried to pull me along, but I didn't come that easily. You never knew what kind of shit they were up to.

"Come on, Amaryllis, you can't miss this! I know your memory is bad and you won't remember, but that is no excuse to not live."

Apparently there would be a masquerade at some students house and we were required to attend. My friend had gotten their hands on a suit and dress straight from a fairytale. They were pretty, but I didn't want to wear them.

It was silly and I wasn't going to give my nightmares more fuel to keep me up at night. They were strange enough as it was already.

"I am not taking no for an answer, you never let yourself do something just for the sake of it. You have to get out of the house and this party will be perfect for it."

No matter what I said, my friend ignored it and pulled me to wherever they wanted to go. In this case a tall man in armour reminiscent of a mediaeval knight.

"Menno! Come look who appeared from the dungeons below the library."

I knew who Menno was, there was no lost love between the two of us; though I could never remember when the animosity had started. We just avoided each other and if we were forced in close company we ignored the others' existence.

"And who is your friend's companion?"

My friend heard someone call their name and left me alone with Xenon. There was a family connection with Menno somewhere, but I had never cared to look into that. None of my business, how the rich of the earth lived their lives.

"Cassy, she's an exchange student, my sister's girlfriend."

My eyes locked with Cassy's. A nightmare unlocked and played out from the depths of her eyes. I couldn't look away, couldn't make it stop.

"I think you and I should have a talk."

1st Fragment | Helen of Troy | Classical Age

"Ama, come quickly! The men have arrived."

Amaranth dutifully put down the pitcher to join Helen in watching the delegation from Troy arrive in the harbour. The child on her back whined as she stood still, and she quickly began soft rocking motions to sooth her.

"How long do you think they will stay? Bringing some life to this empty house."

Helen was looking through the window, her eyes helding that look she always carried when thinking back to her youth. Those long forgotten times when there was still a measure of freedom for the both of them. Or the years before her marriage, with both of them grown up and no longer children.

Now her husband took all her time after sundown.

"I don't know, mistress, as long as Master Menelaos allows them to."

As long as they didn't stare at his wife, vying for the attention of the most beautiful woman in the world.

"I wish..."

The child continued to whine and Amaranth loosened the shawl she had used to carry Hermione. Letting the child rest in her arms and look outside to the visitors of her father's court.

"The court will be busy in a moment, you should rest while you can."

It was an attempt, a plea, for something, anything that her Helen was willing to give.

"Yes, maybe we should do that. A bit of time for just the three of us, till Menelaos wishes for me to be by his side."

It would be the last time they spend it together in peace.

***

"He's impossible!" Helen stormed into her rooms, her anger visible in every wave of her arm and flick of her fingers as she tried to pull the pins out of her hair. "And Menelaos stands by and watches! He acts like he cares, like he will kill them if they come too close, which he has done to men who did not deserve it. But now that his actions are wanted and welcome does he..."

Her anger disappeared as quickly as it had come, her shoulders hanging and her hands laying helplessly in her lap.

"He does nothing."

Amaranth carefully placed her hands on Helen's shoulders. Letting her fingers trail through the strands of her hair she had managed to free in her anger. Pulling the rest of the pins free and letting them fall into their box.

"It will turn out alright, love, don't worry. At some point he'll step in and send them away, he wants to impress them and this is the only way he can think of."

She was playing devil's advocate, the vile words leaving her mouth as if they were sweet words of love. The fact that Menelaos hadn't done anything yet was worrying, he was their only line of defence and if he didn't care no one else would in his place.

"I don't know, I can only hope."

***

"There! Don't let them escape!"

The soldiers were yelling, their words of anger disappearing within the darkness of the night. Menelaos had been away for an afternoon to visit someone outside the city, his faith in his soldiers enough to leave Sparta defenceless.

Helen had been stolen away.

"To the harbour! Cut them off before they board the ship!"

Amaranth had been there when it happened, sleeping beside Helen and her child. She had been defenceless in the firm belief they were safe within Helen's quarters.

"Hurry, Menelaos is coming!"

They had come during the darkest part of the night, she had awoken during the scuffle. Her mistress fighting with everything she had as she was being dragged away, Hermione crying in fear at the unknown people surrounding her.

"Justice will be served!"

Amaranth had picked up the child and hurried after the Troyan men, fighting them every step of the way.

They hadn't come for her.

"Apollo and Heracles will be with us."

She had fought the men to help Helen, to free her from their clutches. The guards that were there to protect them too far away to do anything, no men allowed in the women's quarters.

It had all been for nothing.

The sun rose above the walls as Amaranth was led to the squire. Hermione had been ripped from her arms even before Menelaos had appeared. The child cried and screamed, but there was no one anymore who could soothe her.

Her mother, Helen, had been taken away far over the sea.

Her wet nurse and mother would no longer rock her to sleep at night.

"You let her be taken, you her most trusted guardian. I let you get away with your insolence when Theseus came, as you were a mere child. But no you have no more excuses."

The guards forced Amaranth to her knees, she could hear the cries of Hermione and hoped with all her heart that the child was too far away to see what would transpire.

"You should have died to protect your Mistress, and as you failed in that regard we are here to set things right."

The sword came down and at once the cries stopped. Amaranth faded away together with her child's pleas for help.

2nd Fragment | A Castle Away | Middle Ages

"Winter is coming, Amaranth, it is time."

HIs mother weaved her fingers through his straw blonde hair, pushing it to the side so she could drink in his face. Winter was coming and with it his annual working period at the castle.

"Don't worry mom, it will be fine. I go there every year and every year it is good, you don't have to worry about me."

She didn't believe him, she never did, seeing the weary way he approached the castle year after year. Paying a debt that wasn't his to pay.

"Know I love you, we'll stand behind you no matter what."

It was time for him to leave, his mother and siblings would survive the winter without him being there. There was nothing to worry about, the castle called for him.

"Goodbye mom, tell them I love them and I'll see them when springtime comes."

He was on his way, practically skipping down the road, before his mother could form another answer. Another reason for him to stay a bit longer.

The whole winter would be his to enjoy, safe and warm within the castle walls. Amaranth did feel a bit guilty about the whole ordeal, his mother and siblings thought it was the worst thing that could have ever happened to him whereas it had been the best.

"Helen, I'm coming."

The road to the castle wasn't long by any means, but it would still take quite some time for him to arrive. Helen would be in her rooms or riding in the surrounding hills, her elderly husband would be in his rooms confined to his bed.

Amaranth had never seen lord Menno leave those since he had been sold to the castle more than a decade ago. How the man was still alive and married was a mystery to many. There were whispers he had dabbled in dark magic during his youth, but that seemed unlikely. Magic wasn't real and even if it was, no practitioner of it would live their life unharmed.

Hooves hammering on the forest path behind him, alerted Amaranth a rich noble would be passing by within seconds. Unless he wanted to be run over he would need to get off the road and stand in the mud next to it. That was, if it was a noble and not a group of thugs looking for an easy victim.

"Ho! Look around, he has to be around here, remember our orders."

Hidden behind the biggest tree he could find, held Amaranth his breath in fear. These weren't friendly people who should see him.

"Someone has been walking here! He's close by, Lord Menno."

All the breath left Amaranth's lungs. He was in deep, deep, trouble. It appeared the lord wasn't as bedridden as he had shown the world, nor that oblivious to the clandestine relation his wife had with a farmer's son. The idiot farmer's son hadn't been too careful either as the years passed without anything happening.

That idiot being Amaranth himself.

A hand crashed through the branches, catching the back of his coat in his fist. Amaranth's feet were dangling in the air as he was pulled back to the road and pushed to his knees in front of the lord.

"Did you think you would get away with it? Did you really think I wouldn't notice nor care?"

Lord Menno took out the sword he had kept sheathed during the entire encounter.

It was the moment Amaranth understood, truly understood how this was going to end.

"An unmarked grave is even too good for filth like you."

3rd Fragment | A Midnight too Late | Early Modern Era

"Hurry up, don't let the royal family wait!"

The kitchens of the royal palace were in complete disarray. The king had come by earlier that day and had demanded a feast, for the ball that would happen later that evening. No one had heard about said ball before and apparently the invitations had been sent out during breakfast.

"You servant! Move your ass and help!"

Amaryllis quickly dumped the books he had been carrying in the waiting arms of the librarian before he hurried back to the kitchens. Today would surely test him in more ways than one, and it had barely begun for him.

"Move, move, move! There is no time to lose!"

There would certainly be less time to lose if the man in question would do something else beside yelling.

Last night he had gone to sleep around five in the morning, legally he had been needed to be present till that time in case the princess would need his 'assistance'. He wasn't her guard, nor chamberlain, she just liked his presence. He had no idea how she had managed to convince her parents, but today proved the show was over.

They hadn't been careful enough.

Tonight there would be a ball. The princess would choose a suitor to marry and whatever they were up to would stay in their memories.

"Amaryllis, what are you doing here? You need to escort the princess, and what kind of clothes are you wearing?"

The kitchen staff ignored the whispered orders the same way they ignored Amaryllis standing from where she had been working and leaving through a hidden passageway.

There were many passageways through the castle walls, Amaryllis knew many yet she knew there were even more undiscovered. This one in particular would lead to her own rooms where she would pull on the dress Helen had given her. Pretty enough to show up at the ball, but not pretty enough for her parents to recognise.

After dressing she would go to Helen's room and escort her to the ballroom for the evening. She would be more beautiful than a fallen star and dazzle all the guests. She would dance the night away and Amaryllis would be by the wall watching it all in peace.

They had to have hope, hope that someday everything would turn out better than before.

That day would not be today.

Amaryllis watched as man after man approached Helen. Touched her hand and pulled her around the ballroom in a never ending waltz. Tonight would be the night it all ended and began.

Sneaking away from the ballroom was easier than he thought possible, Helen's brother waiting for him a few paces away.

"Come I have your suit ready. Blow my parents off their feet for me, will you?"

The dress had been beautiful and in a better world Amaryllis would have approached Helen already, taking her hand. But alas that wasn't the case and the suit was just as beautiful.

"You look good, now show Helen it. Sweep her and everyone else away."

A goodhearted slap on his shoulder and he was back in the ballroom.

Tonight would be the night it all ended and began.

It was exhilarating to be beside Helen in such a public place without fear. Her smile full of hope and understanding as she stayed by his side, chatting and gesturing to the ballroom. She knew every story of the castle and gardens and for the first time she was free to talk about every single thing she wanted to. No maids nor ladies who would make her stop talking with the lowly servant cleaning her rooms.

It was a dream, of course it was. For them there was no happy ending.

They had been so close to that famous happy ending.

4th Fragment | Keep It Close | Modern Age

I can dim the lights and sing you songs full of sad things

We can do the tango, just for two

The songs of Queen had been blasting through the windows since the birds had been up. There was a parade in town, though I didn't remember why. It was probably for some show or something, the youth of today liked to be loud and seen.

Ooh, each morning I get up I die a little

Can barely stand on my feet

I didn't know this song anymore, no that isn't right. I knew it, the words were on the tip of my tongue. I had sung that song together with thousands of other people during a parade very much like the one outside my window.

"Amaryllis, what is the problem?"

A woman knocked on the doorframe, her clothes as white as snow, I knew her name. Of course I did.

"Oh nothing dear, just listening to the music. What was it again today?"

She walked closer, cleaning up the clothes I had let drop on the floor, I should have picked them up. I wasn't too old to be able to care for myself.

They say I'm going crazy

"It's June, remember? The party will last the whole month, though I will tell them to tone down the music a bit if it is bothering you."

It wasn't bothering me, the sound was nice, to know there was still a world outside these very walls that kept me captive.

"Can I go outside today? Someone was going to pick me up and I should be ready for her."

I just gotta get out of this prison cell

"We'll see, love, but don't worry too much that is not good for you."

I nodded along, that was what she wanted to hear after all.

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

The song continued to blast through the near silent halls. It was nice of the youngsters outside, to include their predecessors in their pride and joy. It would be better with someone sitting beside me.

"Wasn't there someone coming for me today?"

I was certain of that, someone would be coming today.

"What is their name?"

I knew that, I was certain I had heard it before.

"Something with an H..."

***

The music came back the following days, but I couldn't focus on it anymore.

I want to break free, I want to break free

I had forgotten something and the lady that came to my room from time to time was no help at all.

But I have to be sure when I walk out that door

I had lost something irreplaceable, but at the same time couldn't find the energy to worry about it.

I can't get used to living without, living without

The door creaked open and the lady walked inside, the music fading away into the distance.

Living without you by my side

Epilogue 

Cassy had led Amaranth through the hallways, away from the party and the prying eyes.

"Do you remember now? The things you lost and found along the way?"

She did, the memories had come back as they talked. Sometimes so powerful that Amaranth had to sit down to let it all come in. There were so many things she had lost along the way somewhere.

"Let's go back, I think I know someone you would like to talk with."

They walked back to the semi-ballroom where the guests had cleared enough room for the couples to dance around.

"Hey Love, there you are! Did Cassy show you around? I'm sorry I left you alone with Menno, I know you guys don't really get along, but I needed to pick up Hermione. Can't let other people look after my own kid during a party."

Helen.