Chapter 41 | Control
He checks every corner to make sure we are both alone, and then turns towards me. "I'm gonna be the boss," he whispers.
"Wait, what?" I gape. "How?"
"We had a long talk, and he explained to me that he got a better offer somewhere else, but that he doesn't want to leave his place to just anybody that he'll never be able to trust as much as me. So he wants me to take over. That means I'll be the boss in just two weeks. I actually can't believe it."
I smile from ear to ear and cover my mouth, unable to contain my excitement. "I'm so happy for you!" I slap his chest and hug him. "You deserve it more than anyone here. I'm so proud of you."
"Thank you," he hugs me back. "I can't wait to be there. I hope no one will be disappointed."
"No one will be. Trust me. We'll all be happy and relieved you're the one taking over. We know we don't have to worry about anything if you're the boss," I reply, reassuring him with what I am sure of. He smiles, some softness covering his features. "You think so?"
"I don't think, I know," I state without doubting. "You're the best boss we could ever have."
His smile widens, shaking his head. "You'd literally glaze me no matter what I do, so it's hard to trust what you say."
"As if I were the only one who felt that way about you," I reply, rolling my eyes. "I'm pretty sure the whole team agrees with me," I head to my locker to put my apron in it, and he follows me. "Fine, I'll ask the others then," he leans on the lockers with his hands in the pockets of his gray trousers. "Start with Selene and Wendy. You'll see who truly glazes you."
"They won't. They're too mad at me now," he says, looking at me unbutton my cardigan. "Why are they?"
"They don't like how close I am to you," he answers while adjusting the fit of his grey trousers. "You treat us all the same way. I don't understand why they have to act like that," I throw my cardigan in the locker and close it. "Whatever. Can you imagine all the chocolates you're gonna get once I'm the boss?"
I dart my eyes up to his at the sound of this. "Will I get chocolates every day?"
"Only if you're a good employee, but that doesn't happen very often. Does it?" he smirks, his eyes twinkling mischievously. "That's why you tell me I've done a good job and that you're proud of me every week, hm?"
"Every week, not every day. Ask yourself why," he leans back, teasing me and enjoying it. "You know what? I actually changed my mind. You're the worst boss I could ever have."
He laughs, knowing I do not mean it. "You'll get chocolates every Friday. Not more, but only because I'm a good and caring man."
"That is not true at all, every Friday isn't enough. Those chocolates are so small, you already let me have one for lunch every day. What is it? Five calories? It's nothing," I try to convince him, but he just smiles and shakes his head while staring. "It's not about the calories but sugar. What will happen to that pretty smile if you eat too much of it?" he cups my face with one hand and presses on my cheeks. "You'll get cavities and diabetes. So I need to make sure you don't eat too much."
"I'll brush my teeth right after," I smile, loving the compliments he gives me. "That-" he gets cut off by the door opening. He takes his hand off of me to put it back in his pocket as Luciano came in. "Oops," he grins and goes out of the room right when Luca tries to let him in.
"Well...Good thing it wasn't Selene or Wendy," he bites his lips and looks back at me. "Good job, boss. What are the employees going to think?" I annoy him while heading towards the door, and he chuckles. "Nothing. Luciano won't say nothing, but don't call me that outside of this room."
"I know, I'm not dumb," I hold the handle and wait for him to not talk about this anymore before going out. "I'm not sure, but yeah," he opens the door himself. I hit his big arm and push him out of my way to go first. "You're such a brat," he laughs about it and closes the door.
As he follows me outside, I hear his phone ring. He checks it and slows down, answering a text. I go at the same pace as him, both heading to the fast food restaurant we always eat at every Monday.
"You look annoyed," I mention, but he does not react, continuing to type on his phone. I stare at him and poke his waist. He finally looks at me, his expression softening. "What?"
"I said something, and you ignored me," I mutter. He puts his phone back in his pocket and touches the back of my head to rub it. "I'm so sorry. I didn't hear you, sweetheart. What did you say?"
I think twice before answering him. "Nevermind," I shrug it off and walk a little faster, feeling hungry. "No, tell me. I didn't hear you, but I didn't mean to ignore you," he insists. I decide to give in and respond. "I just said you look annoyed."
"I'm not, don't worry. Why do you think that?" he runs his fingers in his fluffy hair, denying the truth I saw a minute ago. "Your face," I reply. "Was it Jungkook?"
His smile fades slightly. "Yes, but I'm not annoyed. Come on, we're finally here," he drifts the subject to something else and guides me inside the restaurant. Some people are already waiting in line to order their food, so we get behind them.
I glance up at him, towering everyone in the room with his height. He grins down at me and gives a squeeze to my cheek.
"Do you think I changed?" I ask him, curious to have his opinion on this. "What do you mean 'changed'?"
"I don't know. Do I seem less joyful or something these past months?" I hold my hands behind my back and stay focused on him. "Not really. I mean, maybe a little bit. You seemed more...I'm not sure what's the word, but you just seem a little different. Not in a bad way though. Why do you ask me that?"
"Matt told me the other day that I was not as talkative as before. That I'm less 'cute' because I seem to overthink too much about my actions, so I wanted to know your opinion about it," I explain the reason why this question was on my mind. "No, I don't agree with that. You're still as cute. Maybe just a little more mature, so you control your emotions a bit more and contain them. But it's not necessarily a bad thing."
"Okay. As long as I don't look sad, that's all that matters," I glance down. "No, you don't. I wouldn't let that happen anyway," he reassures me constantly, patting my head. I say nothing in response but smile, feeling grateful for his comforting presence.
10 minutes later...
Luca barely eating his meal while working on his laptop as we came back to his office, I pick at my food and look at him from his comfortable seats. "Can I ask you a question?" I swallow hard. He raises his eyes up from his screen and focuses on me. "Yes. What is it?" he rotates his chair.
"Do you know if Jungkook is still doubting? If he said anything weird?" I ask him, worry etched on my face. For a moment, he stares without answering, then finally speaks up. "No. Why?"
"Sure? You know you don't have to lie to me if he told you something I don't know, right?" I put my food next to me and lean back. "He hasn't told me anything special, sweetheart. You don't have to worry. Why do you feel that way?"
"I don't know. He hasn't even texted me," I drop my elbow on the arm of the sofa and rest my head on my hand. "Don't worry too much about his behavior. He's really nervous about messing up, so he's taking it very slow."
"Hm. Okay," I trust his reassurance. He is the only person I would give my whole trust to. I lean forward and put my head back on my hand. "He won't hurt me again...Right?"
"Y/n..." he says with a pained expression. "I believe he won't. He'll do his best to make you both happy. That's why he's taking it slow. He doesn't want to make any mistake."
"Okay," I smile at him, showing I do not doubt his words. I do not bother him anymore with those types of questions and look into space. I fiddle with the fabric of my trousers, remaining quiet, but Luca walks up to me. He grabs my food and sits next to me, forks up a few pieces of salad and meat, then brings it up to my mouth. "You're not eating anything."
I smile and take it in my mouth. "I don't want you to worry about this. Hm? Just enjoy yourself, enjoy the time you spend with him, and nothing else. He loves you, so he'll do his best."
I nod and take a deep breath, feeling a little better after his comforting words. He feeds me again, and I eat everything.
•••
4:50 pm.
< Hey, I'm waiting for you in the parking lot ]
As I just took my apron off, Jungkook finally sends me a text. I open my locker and answer him.
[ Okay, I'll be there in 5min >
I leave my apron in here and close it, and I walk out of the room. I lock the door and head towards Luca's office. I knock, and after a few seconds, he lets me in.
"Hey, the changing room is closed," I say as I place the keys on his desk. "Alright, thank you," he puts his coat on. "You're welcome. Jungkook's in the parking lot if you ever want to say hi."
"I already did," he smiles and grabs the keys and his bag. He comes towards me, and we both get out of the room. He locks his door, and we head outside of the café together. Once all the lights are off, and the front door is locked. We make our way to the parking lot.
"Are you both going to a restaurant or something?" he asks me, and I shake my head. "No, we'll just spend the evening at my house. Unless he planned something else."
"Well, I hope you both have a good time then," he says, taking his car key out. "Thank you. I hope you'll have a good evening and night too."
"Thanks. See you tomorrow, sweetheart," he pats the back of my head and walks away to move to his car. I answer with the same words and look for Jungkook's vehicle.
As soon as I notice him, I smile and walk to him. I enter his car, excited but nervous about spending time alone with him again.
"Hey," I say softly, feeling my heart race with anticipation. "Hey, was your day good?" he turns the ignition on, and I nod. "Yeah, what about yours?"
"Same," he replies, driving away. Why does it feel so awkward?
As I cannot shake off the feeling of tension in the air, I look out of the window. Jungkook clears his throat, breaking the awkwardness as he asks, "So, do you want to go to your house or mine?"
"I don't know. Do you like one more?" I cannot pick, letting him decide. I cannot pick, letting him decide. After a moment of thought, he makes the decision and says, "Let's go to yours. I've spent enough time in mine."
"Alright," I smile and agree. "Have you already eaten dinner?" I ask, secretly hoping for a negative answer. "I haven't. I thought we'd dine together."
"Great. I hoped for this too," I do not hide my excitement. "Will you want me to cook or order something?" I try to already plan our meal. "It depends. Do you want to cook or not that much?"
"I like cooking, so I wouldn't mind," I shrug, gazing at him. "In that case, we can cook together," he smiles and peeks at me. "That sounds great. It's even better."
"What are we gonna eat though?" he slows down in front of a red light, looking at me with a curious expression on his face. "That's a good question. I have plenty of ingredients at my house, but given what time it is, we shoudn't try anything that'd take long."
"True, some pasta or meat would be quick," he suggests. "We'll cook something like that then."
20 minutes later...
"Here," I hand him the tomato he has to dice up and wait for him to be done. He takes his time, carefully dicing the tomato into small, even pieces, and I gaze up at him. "Did you smoke today?"
He glances at me with a smile and responds, "No. I only smoke twice a month now, and I'll quit soon. I just needed to do it gradually."
"Really?" I express some relief and joy, and he nods. "What about alcohol?"
"I only drink when I go out with Luca or some colleagues, and even then, I limit myself as much as I can," he tells me exactly what Luca said when I asked him a few weeks ago. "I'm so happy to hear it. That must be really hard to quit, so I'm proud of you," I add, giving him an encouraging smile. He pauses what he is doing when and looks at me. "You are?"
I can tell he is genuinely surprised.
"Yes. I'm really proud of you," I say, my voice full of sincerity. He smiles back at me and replies. "It means a lot coming from you."
His eyes moving back to the fruit to cut it, I lean closer to him and press a kiss on his cheek. "I knew you could do it," I show him how much I still care, and his smile widens.
He has changed. I can see that he is a stronger person, that he is not scared to show his emotions, vulnerability. I am so happy to see him get better.
"It's done," he puts the knife down and heaves the cutting board up. I move back to not be in the way anymore, and he drops the tomato's pieces into the sauce pot. He brings the pot to a simmer and stirs in the ingredients. He covers the pot and lets it cook.
"Will you want to watch a movie while eating?" I ask. "We can watch whatever you want. Depends on what you usually watch while eating."
"I usually watch some streams," I say as I bring him to the living room behind him. "Let's watch that then. Do you stil watch that guy you used to put on the TV at my house? I can't remember his name, but he's loud."
"I'm not sure which one you're referring to because many of the ones I watch are loud," I grin and turn on my PS5 to play YouTube. He sits down on the sofa and pays attention to the screen, so I check my subscriptions and show him. "Which guy?"
"That one," he points his finger at someone and lays his hand over mine to move the joysticks. He picks one video where his face is visible. "Oh, him. Yes, I still enjoy watching his videos."
"We can watch him then, he's fun from what I remember," he takes his warm skin away from mine, and I press play on a horror game VOD. "Here. It's three hours long, so we got time."
"Yeah. I'm gonna stir in the sauce though," he goes back to the open kitchen to keep an eye on the food. I follow him, feeling better close to him. "We can probably boil some water now," I grab the packet of pasta and put it down next to the pot of water. "Yeah, we can."
I turn the heat up high and place the lid on the pot.
"Were you busy today?" he asks, and I shake my head. "Not more than usual. Why?"
"I'm just curious," he shrugs and smiles. "You know you can always text me if you want, right? I know I didn't answer your last texts, but it was only because I was trying to make you forget me, and staying in contact with you was also more painful than anything."
I wonder if Luca shared any information with him. He seems to be aware of how concerned I was all day.
"I know, it's okay. I just don't want to bother you or be too clingy," I explain, without referring to the conversation I had with his best friend earlier. "You won't bother or be too clingy. I promise. This would only make my day better if you sent me a text, so don't overthink."
"You can do the same, you know," I smile at him, indicating that I would appreciate reciprocity. "I know, I just overthink too," he says, returning the smile as we both know we are the same when it comes to this.
I think we just need to get comfortable with each other again.
"Fine, then I'll text you next time I want to. I won't hold back," I peek down at his lips as I felt a weight lift off my chest. He licks them and bites his bottom one. "I will too," he whispers, his eyes filled with longing as he drops them to my lips.
We do not say anything more, just letting the tension between us build as we both know what we want from each other. He made it clear he just wants us to be friends for now, but it is so hard to hold back from touching and kissing him.
"Do you..." I clear my throat and glance away, knowing I have to respect his wishes and decision. "Is your workplace further from here or your house?" I ask, trying to change the subject.
"It's...I'm not sure. I think it's closer from here than from my house," he replies, laying one hand on the counter as the other went in his pocket. "Hm. Would you mind sleeping here one day instead of going back to your house if we both hang out here?" I dare try. "Or maybe on the weekend...?"
He licks his lips again, a smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "Yeah...One day. But for now...It's better to avoid it," he rubs his finger over his ear, seeming nervous. "Why?"
He nibbles on his bottom lip, looking away before finally saying, "It's just not a good idea. It's already hard to...to control some things, even though it's only been two days without seeing each other that much, so...yeah...you know what I mean. It's not that I don't want to, but I'd rather wait."
I nod in understanding and check the water in front of me. "I really want you to be honest with me, and I won't be sad or anything, but do you want us to only be friends for now because you're still not sure you'd want us to be more than that? Or is it only because you wanna go slow?" I attempt to get more answers, needing to understand where he stands.
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