"Raya!" A harsh voice barked.

"Five more minutes!" I grumbled pulling the blanket over my head and rolled over, my back to the room.

I heard his footsteps stomping on the cold cement floor. I begged to disappear into the floor. To disappear into nothing, be forgotten like I was by the people of Denver. Or maybe my heart would stop right this second and I could leave this sick twisted world. No such luck. I hated the odds in my life. Nothing was ever in my favor. My blanket was ripped off. And the cold air if the WICKED soldier breaks hit my skin.

"Get up, soldier." He barked again. His voice was sharp, and harsh. But he was always sharp and harsh. This wasn't new, but maybe the edge wasn't there...maybe not today.

I flipped him off, not even bothering to get out of bed or open my red swollen, exhausted and broken eyes. That's how I felt in general. Exhausted and broken.

I was the only one who could be disobedient without losing a finger or ending up with a fist to the chin. "Monster" seemed to have a soft spot for me. I didn't flaunt it or use it to my advantage. But today maybe I would. Today I need a slightly less harsh leader.

It was a terrible night. And maybe I needed to be given a sliver of grace, whatever his harsh hard heart could muster up right now. It wouldn't be much but it would be more then I've had in years.

•×•

For nine years WICKED had mandatory viewings. The moment of The Reaping, everything had been televised for what's left of the known world. We have always been forced to watch. The Trials were constantly aired on every single tv or screen available.

For nine years, us "regular civilians" had access to the stats and information to each Test Subject. The kids had been decided into different maze groups based on a check list of things. Their IQ, health, aptitude for different things, problem solving skills and your popularity with the general public. The most popular boys were categorized as group A while the most popular girls were Group B. And then it went from there.

There were about a dozen different mazes. Each maze was slightly different, but the concept was the same; throw the worst possible conditions and terrible "variables" at these kids and monitor their brain activity and see why they were different, 

A lot of people had gotten really into the Trials the longer they ran. You become attached to people you see everyday and watch grow up with. Though they didn't know they were being watched, we certainly saw them grow up.

I was now nineteen. And I had watched my baby sister and best friend grow up inside a WICKED, inside white tiled halls and science labs. I had watched as they took Hailey's innocence, and watched the mischievous twinkle in Minho's eye die out. And then after years of prep and studying the "Test Subjects" were finally ready for entrance into the Maze.

I had watched on live television as people called in, picking their favorites and votes were counted, like some horrible sick twisted game show.

Hey, Vana, I'll take everyone is sick in the head for 2000.

And then from those votes, the most popular 20 girls and 20 boys were called up on stage.

I remember watching with my stomach twisting in anticipation. I remember having to run to the bathroom and actually throw up as my baby sister at the age of 15 got chosen to go into her Maze with the first group. And I watched Minho be picked almost first to be put into his maze.

I had to stop watching. I walked away. And sat in the hall, alone and waited until it was over.

•×•

Two and a half years later and I had heard my little sister had a horrible accident in the maze. I watched the footage back. My world had stopped. Everything around me faded. Noise stopped. Colours faded. My heart stopped. I couldn't breath. I gripped the small hand held tablet and watched, blood draining from my face. I'm positive I blacked out.

I watched as my bright bubbly happy sister ran head first into a Griever. She didn't even flinch or cry out. Just ran, eyes forward with a look of determination as she ran for the deadly monster. I knew she was unhappy. I knew she had struggled with everything that happened. It was no secret. It was televised for the world to see. The nation watched my sister descend into a dark depression and did nothing but take bets on how long she would last.

And when her memories were whipped she still had all those negative feelings and emotions. And finally she couldn't handle it anymore. And when she heard the unmistakable sounds of a Griever in her maze chasing her down, she turned and ran towards the sound.

I placed the tablet down after that and walked away. I couldn't finish the footage. I knew the outcome. I was now alone. I was an orphan. I had no parents or sister anymore. No best friend. I was alone. I was unattached and had no one. And I was done.

"Ray..." His voice softened just slightly, it snapped me from my terrible thoughts. Monster was never gentle. "I heard about last night. I'm sorry."

I finally rolled onto my back. And slowly sat up, crossing my legs. I raised my face and looked at him hard, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Ya well...The odds were never in her fucken favor, Theo. You know that." I hissed through clenched teeth. I had to swallow my emotions. I couldn't cry. I wouldn't cry. Not here. Not now. Maybe not ever again.

His dark eyes flicked to the corners of the room where the camera were. At first I thought it was sick there were cameras in our sleeping quarters, but after everything I'd been through in nine years some dude watching us sleep was nothing.

His eyes flicked back to me. I probably looked like a mess. Hair a matted mess from rolling trying to sleep, my eyes were red and swollen, and I was pale with big black bags.

"Come on, Ray. I need you up." His voice is slightly less harsh. Which makes me look up at him again. His dark eyes hold something behind them, but I can't figure out what it is.

Before I could say anything the door bangs open a group of guards come storming in lead by the the leader, Eric. He's mean and vicious. He's young and trying to make a name for himself. I internally groan. I knew this wouldn't last, whatever "this" was. I guess that's why we're leaving. A small group of us were deserting.

"What's the initiate still doing in bed?"

"Trying to seduce Monster to join me, Eric." I snapped, trying really hard not to roll my eyes.

Theo's eyes snap to me but his face is hard as stone now. I'm not sure if I surprised him or he was trying to warn me. Even his eyes have gone blank. But that caught the full attention of Eric. His sick twisted smile made me want to shiver. But it was too late, I had to stick to my guns now. So many times my mouth got me in trouble.

"Also, I'm not an initiate anymore. It's been nine years. I've actually been here longer then you."

Great I though, I'm really on a roll. I have an actual death wish. Keep running my mouth to this trigger happy idiot, and I'll die before breakfast. Great. Keep going.

"You wanna join me instead? Monster seems too...stiff this morning."

"Someone wants to test her luck in the pit today?" It wasn't a question. It was a threat. And I knew I was screwed when he smiled even more maliciously at me. And he looked at Theo, daring him to say anything.

"Get up, or go to training like that."

"Aye aye captain." I saluted him.

Eric smirked, but unlike Minho's old cocky ones, this held nothing but trouble. He turned to go. Before he left, he back handed me, my head snapped to the side. I tasted blood. He leaned down and grabbed my chin making me look at him. His blue eyes were as cold as ice.

"Keep that attitude Initiate, and I'll bring you to Director Janson and he can deal with you. Personally." Eric whispered, used his thumb and whipped the trail of blood off my lip and stood up. He smirked at Theo.

He had done nothing or said nothing, just stood stiff, watching the interaction, the muscle in his jaw twitched occasionally. "Keep your initials in line, or I'll bring you to The Director."

Theo didn't flinch. He didn't move, he stood straight and looked Eric dead in the eye. Then a slight smirk appeared on his face.

"I'm sure it would be a... productive meeting."

Eric smirked right back. Only a few people who know about the history between Janson and Theo. I swallowed the fear down. I knew that was a low blow for Eric to bring up Janson. But it didn't seem to effect Theo.

They stood almost nose to nose and stared each other down. Eric was loud and rude and harsh, he was in every sense a bully with too much power. Theo was quiet and yet extremely intimidating. He didn't need to be loud and rude for people (especially the Guard,) to lower their eyes and listen without hesitation. He was broody, quiet and calculating. He didn't get the nickname Monster for nothing.

Eric finally turned and left. Theo and I watched him go. The room was quiet and tense. I spat a mouthful of blood into the floor.

"You have 5 minutes, Ray." His voice was quiet but it cut through the tension and I flinched slightly. And then watched as he also left the barracks.

Nine years I had slept in this bed and nine years I had dealt with this kind of confrontation. I had been with the WICKED guard for nine years. Trained under an old guard named Bogs. He was strict but also had a soft spot. When he disappeared without a trace, I had a different leader and then "The Monster" showed up. No one knew where he came from, but he was trained and he was good.

I groaned loudly and slowly pulled myself from bed. No one was going to care I just lost my sister to the Maze Trials. They wanted their robots.

•×•

I slouched into the cafeteria fully dressed in my WICKED gear, my helmet under my arm. The dining hall was full of people and clattering silverware. I grabbed a tray and grabbed some food and looked around. I look for empty seats. I discovered a mostly empty table at the side of the room, groaning I stomp over. I find myself sitting between Theo and another girl, Brenda.

Great. Just my luck. This is what happens when I lay in bed and hope to die. I grind my teeth as I sit down and pick at my food.

"Initiate ain't hungry?" Brenda asks, her elbow jabs into my side.

I roll my eyes. I've known Brenda for almost the same amount of time as I've been in the WICKED guard. She's not a full fledged soldier, she's a frontline medic. But as far as friends go, I'd count her as one. We try to keep our friendship quiet. Because heaven forbid you have friends in this place, and Janson, Eric or The Chancellor hear about it then one or both are as good as dead. So, we do our best to stay quiet. But if I was going to name friends she would be number one.

"Leave it, Bee." Theo hisses suddenly. He hardly turns his eyes away from his food, but the warning is there. Brenda raises an eyebrow.

"You stickin' up for me now, Monster?" I ask taking a bite of toast. It's bland. There's no taste to anything now that I've lost Hailey. I swallow hard, the toast is dry in my mouth, it feels like I'm choking.

"You sat beside me. You chose to come here." He pointed out, sipping his coffee.

"It must be because you’re so approachable," I say flatly. "You know. Like a bed of nails."

He looks up and stares at me, and I don’t look away. He isn’t a dog, but the same rules ways apply. Looking away is submissive. Looking him in the eye is a challenge. It’s my choice. And it's been that way for two years. He's my squad leader, he's my superior. But I can't help but mouth off.

Heat rushes into my cheeks. What will happen when this tension breaks?  I hate that my mouth does things before my brain stops it. But like each time I mouth off he looks me dead in the eye, his dark and broody ones are dangerous and eriy calm. Like he's had a lifetime of practice of keeping his emotions and feelings in check.

His eyes flash in warning but he just says, "Careful, Ray."

And picks his tray up and walks away, dumping it in the dirty bin and then leaves the loud caffitera.

I groan and place my head in my hands.

"Girl." Brenda whispers. "You got a death wish." She takes a few more bites of her scrambled eggs. "I'm sorry about Hailey."

I feel her hand on my knee and give it a squeeze. I can feel the ache of her loss again. I'm not sure if it will ever go away.

"The odds of her surviving the Trials...were slim to none. And now...she doesn't have to deal with any more pain or wonder what the shuck is going on. She's in a better place now."

As I was talking I didn't realize how hard I was gripping the coffee mug. It exploded in hot coffee and shards of white ceramic

"Shuck!" I curse. My hand is bleeding.  "I'll catch you later."

I get up, my hand in a tight fist, trying to keep the blood from leaking out. I rush out of the cafeteria and into the bright white halls. And down the hall to the medical bay.

I never understood the bright white halls. Everything was white; the floors, the walls the lighting. Everything but our WICKED guard uniforms. They were solid black. Black boots, pants, shirt, jacket bullet proof vest helmet with tinted visor...even our standard issue gun was black. That's why, I liked to dye my hair. Right now, I was in the purple phase. My hair was naturally a dark raven black, but I had bright purple throughout. I didn't like to confirm, I didn't like to be the same government issued robot soilder.

I had tattoos and piercings and purple hair. I did what I could to be different. Without being reprimanded, I pushed boundaries, but never crossed them. Okay I lied. I crossed them constantly. But never in big bold statements, everything was subtle.

Until this afternoon. This afternoon I'd be breaking all the rules. Deserting WICKED... that's as bad as it goes. And maybe that's why I was so anxious and mouthy. A few of us were turning into rebels. We were leaving The Guard. And we were going to help bust the girls from Maze B out. If only Hailey could have waited 24 hours. But I was too late. I lost my sister 24 hours before I was busting in to rescue her and that made the loss that much worse.

I had to stop in the shadow of a hall. My chest hurt and it was hard to breath. I sunk down crouched in the corner. Sharp claws ripped at my lungs an impossible weight sat on my chest. Some invisible hand squeezed my throat, I ripped at my vest, it was too heavy. I couldn't breath. I was gasping. Struggling to take a full breath. The longer I was crouched in the corner the harder it was to think and function.

There was a weight lifted off my chest. It was ripped over my head. Hands fumbled with my WICKED standard guard issues pants, digging in the pockets.

"Hey! Ray, breath. Come on... Here." Something was shoved into my hands. I couldn't focus on that, I couldn't breathe. "Come on, I can't do this for you. Work with me Ray."

My hand was forced to my mouth. My puffer was uncapped and ready in my hand. Someone held my hand up. I took my puffer and felt the relief of the claws around my lungs. I took my puffer for the second time and felt the claws retract completely. I leaned my head back on the wall and took slow and steady breaths.

"It's getting worse."

My eyes fluttered open. Squatting in front of me was Theo. A dark look of concern on his broody dark featured face. He held my vest, he ripped the heavy weighted bullet proof vest off me so I could breath easier. His helmet and gun discarded beside him

"It's...it's just...today has been a lot." I paused. "24 hours Theo...all I needed was an extra 24 hrs."

"I know." He says so quietly I almost miss it.

•×•