CONFESSIONS

The next two days passed quickly without any interaction from his friends or even Taeyeon. So when on Monday morning Baekhyun woke up to the buzzing of his phone, he had been expecting it. Groaning he reached out to answer it, holding it to his ear for a moment as he uttered a groggy, "Hello?" before realizing it had only been a text message. He blushed and quickly unlocked his phone. Tapping the notifications to read it.

From: Queen TaeTae
To: B.B.H. Bunny

Hey, Baek. Something came up last night, I won't be coming to school today. Talk later, okay?

That's all she had said. Baekhyun furrowed his brow curiously and muttered, "Strange. I wonder what it is . . .?"

From: B.B.H. Bunny
To: Queen TaeTae

Okay, talk later. Hope you figure out whatever it is!

——

Getting ready for school that morning Baekhyun couldn't help but think in the silence of his apartment. His thoughts not wondering to Taeyeon and why she would be missing school, but instead they wondered to Chanyeol. Much like they always seemed to lately. A part of him was excited to see Chanyeol, but the other part —- the embarrassed part —- wasn't ready. He didn't think he'd ever be ready, honestly.

Chanyeol was too far out of his reach, and the more he reached for him the further he slipped away. He was his college professor, and Baekhyun was his student. So how could they ever be without getting in trouble? Also, Baekhyun didn't even know how old he was. He couldn't be more than thirty though, while Baekhyun was twenty-two. The age difference probably wouldn't be that bad. But there was Taeyeon and there was the fact that Chanyeol was his professor. So how could it ever work?

Baekhyun's performance and arts class was stressful for many reasons. One, Chanyeol kept looking at him, probably thinking Baekhyun didn't notice. Two, whenever Baekhyun messed up, even if only by a little bit, Chanyeol would snap at him. Third, when he did something right, Chanyeol would gently squeeze his shoulder and tell him "Good job".

Baekhyun wanted to scream. He wanted to punch Chanyeol's beautiful face for fucking his life up so badly and then he wanted to hit him again for thinking he was beautiful. And he wanted to kiss him.

He wanted to kiss him so badly it was maddening. He felt like there was a war ragging on inside him, tugging him this way and that way. And when their practice as a group was finally over, which consisted of only the few of them who passed their singing auditions; such as Taeyeon, Kyungsoo, Luhan, Jongdae, Minseok. Some others being Minho, Owen, Jonghyun, Taemin, and Key; they were free to work on other things.

With a face twisted in pain, Baekhyun snuck away from the crowd and slipped behind the stage curtain. He felt like he was going to hyperventilate and dragged his hands through his hair in frustration. He was slowly losing it, and with little tears rolling down his cheeks he clasped onto the stage floor and buried his face in his arms as he silently cried.

He had been too lost in his own thoughts and his eyes too blurry with tears to notice when someone pulled the curtain back and walked toward him.

Baekhyun jumped, his hands flying out and smacking against the floor in surprise when he saw and heard who was there. Baekhyun sat there for a moment, frozen as he just stared. Chanyeol's brow was furrowed and he was biting the inside of his cheek as he watched Baekhyun, who noticed Chanyeol's eyes were full of emotion.

Baekhyun couldn't move. He was trapped in those soft, worry filled almond shaped eyes.

His breathing hitched and finally he managed to speak, although raspy. "Wh-what are you doing? Why are you staring at me like that?" Baekhyun softly whispered. Chanyeol's lips twitched and he ran a hand through his hair as he closed his eyes and his brow furrowed. Chanyeol's hand slide down to his neck, and after another moment he looked back up at Baekhyun.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

Baekhyun's heart jumped and he sucked in a breath.

He wants to know if I'm okay? Why does that sound so funny? Baekhyun thought.

Slowly he shook his head. "N-no, I'm not," Baekhyun admitted with a heavy sigh.

Chanyeol's frown deepened and he remained his crouched position as he asked, "Is it . . . something I can help you with? As your teacher, I mean?"

There was a pang in Baekhyun's heart at Chanyeol's words and he muttered, "As my teacher . . ." Little tears falling from his eyes again upon saying the words. He dropped his head into his arms again as soft yet violent sobs raking over his body.

Chanyeol watched him brokenly for a moment, his hand over his mouth to quiet himself as well. Then against his better judgement, he slowly scooted towards Baekhyun and pulled him into his arms, words falling from his lips that he knew he shouldn't say.

"Don't cry. Please, don't cry. You should never cry. Someone as perfect as you should never be sad. Shhh, please, don't cry. Baekhyun, please . . ." Chanyeol softly soothed.

Chanyeol's words had him crying even harder and he gasped. "I-I can't —- I can't forget. Why can't I forget?" Baekhyun sobbed as he buried his face into Chanyeol's shoulder.

Chanyeol squeezed his eyes shut and soothingly ran his hand up and down Baekhyun's back. Chanyeol bit his lip, wanting so badly to say what he was feeling. But Baekhyun was already so upset so what if saying something hurt him more? But what if....it helped him instead?

Chanyeol exhaled a shaky breath and gently grabbed Baekhyun's shoulders, pushing him back until he could see his face. Chanyeol's face was still contorted in grief for the latter, and he delicately brushed Baekhyun's tears away before softly muttering, "Would you be willing to hear something I have to say? It —- it could help you, but it....could also hurt you." Chanyeol murmured with a furrowed brow. He glanced back up to meet Baekhyun's eyes as he said, "And I promise, it is not my intention to hurt you. I just.... I want to help you if I can."

Baekhyun stayed silent as he gazed at Chanyeol with burry eyes, small tears still running down his cheeks. His words came out hoarse from all the crying when he said, "Um, o-okay. What is it?"

Chanyeol shook his head and his eyes held Baekhyun's, his look so intense as he softly murmured, "Not yet," before leaning in and delicately pressing their lips together.

Baekhyun gasped and jerked back, his eyes wide in shock as he stared back at Chanyeol. But when he noticed the look in Chanyeol's eyes, Baekhyun's mouth fell open slightly in shock.

"Y-you . . ." Baekhyun trailed off as he lost his ability to speak.

Chanyeol sighed and closed his eyes, and when he reopened them, he murmured, "Yes, I . . . I like you. And you've been stuck in my head ever since that night too. I'm sorry I've been snapping at you, but I just didn't know what else to do. I was trying to stop my feelings, but that only made me think of you more. I know your my student and I'm your teacher and that you have a girlfriend, but . . ." Chanyeol trailed off as he reached out and gently gathered Baekhyun's hands into his own.

"But don't you want to try? We can keep it a secret until we figure out how we feel? And I don't think I just want you in that way. I mean, I do, but it's more than that. You made me smile and laugh that night, something I really haven't done too much of lately, and it felt nice. So, Byun Baekhyun, will you give us a chance? Can you say yes?"

Baekhyun didn't know any other words when he softly whispered, "Yes, I can give us a chance."

And then the fear started to creep in, and he continued on by saying, "But what if someone found out? Like Taeyeon? I can't hurt her, but if we do this . . ." Baekhyun trailed off and Chanyeol smiled sadly.

He gently caressed Baekhyun's cheek and murmured, "No one will find out, not unless we want them too."

"How can you be so sure?" Baekhyun muttered.

"I don't really know anyone here, so we could always hang out at my place?" Chanyeol suggested.

Baekhyun bit his lip nervously and murmured, "Um, maybe? Since my friends think my place is a revolving door." Chanyeol chuckled at that and Baekhyun smiled, his gaze dropping to his hands as his cheeks filled with color. Chanyeol smiled softly and caressed Baekhyun's cheek with his thumb.

"So, would it be too much if I asked for permission to kiss you?" Chanyeol softly asked.

Baekhyun quietly laughed and replied, "You've never asked for permission before."

Chanyeol chuckled too. "Yeah, I guess you're right," he muttered before gently connecting their lips.

Baekhyun fell into the kiss and wrapped an arm around Chanyeol's neck to pull them closer. They stayed like that until they had to pull away to breathe, and when they did, Baekhyun fell forward and rested his cheek against Chanyeol's chest. Chanyeol wrapped his arm around Baekhyun's waist, holding him close. They got too lost in their own bubble that when the bell rang for the end of class, they both jumped in surprise.

"I'm sorry, you probably had things to do," Baekhyun muttered as he pulled out of Chanyeol's embrace.

Chanyeol shook his head and retorted, "No, not really. What about you?" Baekhyun shook his head.

Chanyeol opened his mouth, about to say something else when suddenly Baekhyun's name was being called. He jerked away from Chanyeol, falling back on his butt in his panic while Chanyeol softly chuckled.

"I'll see you later Baekhyun," he softly muttered before disappearing into the other side of the semi-dark stage. Baekhyun stared after him with his mouth slightly open, only the sound of Kyungsoo's voice when he yelled brought him back to himself.

"Baekhyun! What are you doing back here?" Kyungsoo demanded.

Baekhyun quickly scrambled to his feet and stuttered, "Wh-what? N-nothing." Kyungsoo narrowed his eyes and from behind him, Luhan poked his head through the curtain.

"Did you find him?" he whispered.

Kyungsoo nodded and replied, "Yeah, he's been hiding back here the whole time."

Luhan pushed the curtain to the side and stepped through as he asked, "Why were you back here, Baek?"

"Because I needed some place quiet to think," Baekhyun replied truthfully.

"Oh. Are you sick?" Luhan asked as he came to a stop in front of Baekhyun and pressed the back of his hand to his forehead. "You're cheeks look flushed."

Baekhyun shook his head and mumbled, "No. Why?"

Luhan shrugged and muttered, "I'm only wondering because Taeyeon isn't here today. Is she sick?"

"I don't think so. She said something came up," Baekhyun muttered. "Anyway, I gotta go."

——

When Baekhyun got home he decided to change into his most comfortable sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants. He was sitting cross-legged on his bed doing the list of assignments he had been given that day when his phone buzzed and lit up with a message. Baekhyun pushed his books aside and grabbed his phone, reading the message.

From: Queen TaeTae
To: B.B.H. Bunny

Hey, Baek. Can I come over?

From: B.B.H. Bunny
To: Queen TaeTae

Yeah, sure. I'm just doing homework. Are you close?

From: Queen TaeTae
To: B.B.H. Bunny

Yeah, just pulled off the highway.

From: B.B.H. Bunny
To: Queen TaeTae

Okay, I'll see you soon. Love you.

From: Queen TaeTae
To: B.B.H. Bunny

See you soon. Love you, too.

(A/N: Quick question. Did anyone notice the change with the messages?)

Baekhyun sighed and slide off his bed, shoving his books into a makeshift pile on the corner of his bed before making his way into his kitchen. He decided to cook something because he was hungry, and also, just to show Taeyeon that he still cared even if it wasn't the way she wanted.

He had noodles boiling in a pot of water when he heard a knock on the front door followed by it being pushed open as Taeyeon called out, "Baek, it's me! Where are you?"

"Kitchen!" Baekhyun called back.

Taeyeon appeared a moment later and looked at what Baekhyun was doing before she softly muttered, "You're cooking . . ."

Baekhyun sheepishly laughed and replied, "Well, trying to cook at least."

A look passed over Taeyeon's face that Baekhyun couldn't read, and then it disappeared as she said, "But you're a horrible cook."

Baekhyun sighed and turned to Taeyeon, grabbing her hand as he muttered, "Yeah, I know. I've also been a horrible boyfriend to you lately. So, I'm sorry and I—"

"Wait!" Taeyeon suddenly cut him off. Baekhyun blinked in surprise and Taeyeon nervously bit her lip before softly whispering, "Please, don't apologize. I don't deserve it. I don't . . . I don't deserve you, Baek. You're so kind to me and I—-and I . . ." By this point, Taeyeon had tears rolling down her cheeks as she gripped Baekhyun's shirt and dropped her head onto his shoulder.

His arms went around her waist to comfort her as she finally managed to whisper, "I cheated on you."

Baekhyun's eyes widened and his hand stilled against her back, and it took a moment for him to compose himself. When he finally did, he grabbed her chin and lifted her face up to see her. She had tears rolling down her cheeks and her eyes begged for forgiveness and screamed regret.

His breathing hitched and he murmured, "You....you cheated on me?" Taeyeon dropped her eyes and slowly nodded her head.

Her hand touched Baekhyun's, tightly holding on to him as she softly murmured, "I'm so sorry. I was feeling so sad last night and I had gone to a club with some friends. There was a guy and he had shown interest, and the next thing I knew . . ." Taeyeon trailed off, more tears gushing from her eyes as she gasped.

"Oh God, Baek. I was so stupid. Please, forgive me? I love you. I'm so sorry. Please?"

Baekhyun pursed his lips and a small frown creased between his brow as he muttered, "Tae. I have to tell you something too . . ."

Taeyeon sniffled and murmured, "What is it, Baek?"

"I . . . I also cheated," Baekhyun admitted with a heavy breath.

Taeyeon blinked in shock and dropped her hands to her sides. Her face twisted in grief as Baekhyun continued to say, "I'm so sorry. I hate that I hurt you. That's why I've been so distant because I can't . . ." Baekhyun trailed off. "I mean, I couldn't."

"I couldn't figure out how I felt, but now that you've told me this I have a confession of my own. I'm— I mean, I kissed a . . . guy," Baekhyun whispered the last word. Taeyeon's eyes widened and her jaw dropped.

"You —- you kissed a guy?"

Baekhyun grimaced and just decided to be straightforward with her, not wanting to hide it anymore as he continued on to say, "And . . . other things."

Taeyeon's eyes became even wider and she gasped. She didn't know what to say. She didn't know how to react. Her boyfriend . . . he might be gay?

"Did you —- did you like it?" Taeyeon whispered, unable to meet Baekhyun's eyes as she asked.

Baekhyun heaved a heavy breath. "I— Yes. Yes, I . . . I liked it. But I was also drunk at the time, and then we kissed again and . . ." Baekhyun had tears in his eyes too and he whispered, "I never wanted to hurt you, but I understand now. I understand why I could never give you what you wanted. I'm —- I'm gay."

Taeyeon felt more tears fall down her cheeks and Baekhyun moved to comfort her, but she flinched away. Baekhyun's face fell and she grimaced at hurting him.

"I —- I'm sorry, but . . . I have to leave," she whispered. Then she turned away, tears still streaking down her cheeks as Baekhyun heaved a shaky sigh and clasped back against his fridge. Tears rolling down his own cheeks as he felt a heavy weight finally lifting off his chest —- finally allowing him to breathe.

After Baekhyun had gotten all of his tears out, one thought drifted through his mind.

Chanyeol. I have to see Chanyeol.

———————————————————

Author's Notes

Hi, my lovely readers!

Well, secrets out! How did you guys enjoy the chapter? Oh, if you haven't noticed, well, today is an update day for all my stories. Yay!

I hope you've enjoyed what you've read so far, and please don't forget to vote, comment, and share with your friends!

Anyway, until next time.... 🌸🌸

Love from,
BunnyBaekkiee ❤️