Chapter 5

Izuku reached his bedroom door, opening it up and stepping inside. His scarred hand went up to his curly hair, running his fingers through it as he switched the light on. He absentmindedly closed the door behind him, his brows furrowing when it didn't close completely. When he went to see why the door didn't close, his eyes met angry red ones.

Katsuki barged inside the room, making Izuku stumble back in utter surprise. Izuku didn't have time to react as the bottle of vitamins was thrown his way, hitting him straight on the nose with brutal force. The impact made Izuku lose his footing, arms reflectively going back to take the fall. Katsuki was fuming, eyes glaring daggers at the greenette.

"K-Kacchan...!" Izuku yelped, hands flying up to cup his now throbbing nose His eyes fell on the bottle now on the floor, his body freezing momentarily. How did Katsuki know?

"What the hell is going on, Deku?" Katsuki demanded, slamming the door shut behind him so that the others wouldn't listen in on their conversation.

"W-What are you talking about?" Izuku asked, trying to ease his nerves. He's had enough panic attacks for the day, he didn't need one more. Especially in front of the blond.

"Stop playing dumb! Why were the vitamins inside the trash can?" Katsuki asked, his usual scowl on his face and arms crossed.

"They probably f-fell when I went t-to the kitchen earlier. I probably didn't n-notice." Izuku lied, grabbing the vitamins and standing up from the ground. The pain in his nose subsided, leaving the greenette with only a slight throbbing.

Katsuki's glare only intensified, now stomping closer to Izuku and grabbing the front of his shirt. "Is that so?! Well, that's fucking funny, because I'm pretty damn sure that I saw you throwing them inside the trash can yourself."

Izuku's eyes widened, looking like a deer caught in the headlight. His mind whirred with all kinds of excuses he could make up, but none seem credible enough. Not when they were directed to Katsuki. He knew that he couldn't lie, but he didn't want to tell the blond his pathetic reason as to throwing the bottle away. Because, sure enough, Katsuki would start making fun of him.

"Oi, stop with the staring and fucking answer me!" Katsuki exclaimed, shaking Izuku slightly. He was growing impatient with each passing second without an answer. Izuku closed his eyes in a wince, preparing himself for a possible beat-up. He would rather be punched and kicked instead of telling Katsuki the truth. He didn't want to disappoint him more than he already had.

Silence fell upon them as none of them said anything. Izuku was now breathing heavily, anticipation growing and hands trembling. Katsuki noticed, and his eyes widened in the slightest before letting go of his shirt. The greenette's eyes then opened up, surprised by Katsuki's actions. He obviously didn't expect the blond to back down, much less look at him with a slightly concerned expression.

Was Katsuki worried about him?

Of course not, you idiot. Your dear Kacchan has never cared about you.

Right.

"It's getting late, you should probably go get some rest," Izuku mumbled, placing the bottle of vitamins on his nightstand. The sound of a chair scraping against the floor was heard, gaining Izuku's attention. To his surprise, he found Katsuki sitting down on his desk chair, arms crossed in front of his chest.

"You're not telling me what to do and I ain't leaving without an answer." Katsuki glared. Izuku bit the inside of his cheeks in frustration, slightly getting angry. Why wouldn't the blond just leave him alone?! Couldn't he get the hint that he didn't want to say? That he wanted to be alone?

The greenette decided to just ignore him, going inside the half bathroom and grabbing his toothbrush. He silently brushed his teeth, frown etched on his face the entire time. He didn't look at himself in the mirror as he rinsed his mouth, spitting up the foam and wiping his chin. Settling the toothbrush back in its place, Izuku stepped out of the bathroom.

Katsuki was still on the same spot, ruby-red eyes never leaving Izuku's frame. The greenette was growing impatient, wondering why the hell his childhood friend wanted to know so badly. He didn't care about him!

Izuku avoided his gaze, walking towards his bed and taking his shoes off. He knew that if he left the blonde waiting, he would grow annoyed and just leave. At least he hoped so as he pulled back the covers and laid down on his bed facing the wall. The silence between them was unsettling, almost as if the blonde weren't there. Izuku draped the covers over his body until they reached his shoulders, bringing his knees up to his chest and hugging his legs.

A few minutes passed-which felt like hours-before Katsuki spoke once again. "Is it because of the nightmares?"

Izuku tensed up, his breath caught in his throat and his eyes widened. The softness in Katsuki's voice reminded him of earlier in the day when the blond had hugged him. It was so foreign, so unusual, that it made him believe that it was another person. How could Katsuki know? Did the blond figure he lied when he said he hasn't had any other nightmares other than the one in the nurse's office? Was he too obvious?

"Dammit, Deku! Fucking answer me!" Katsuki bellowed, his anger returning. "Recovery Girl asked me to make sure you took your vitamins and get proper rest because she knew you weren't going to do so yourself. So if you're going to keep ignoring me, I'm going to force those vitamins down your throat, ya hear me?!"

Izuku didn't notice that he was now trembling, tears prickling the corner of his eyes and threatening to spill. He was having flashbacks of the horrible nightmares, his mothers taunting voice, all the blood. There was never a nightmare without blood.

Katsuki noticed the greenette's trembling, and his scowl turned into a frown. "Deku-"

"It's so horrible, Kacchan," Izuku whispered, hugging his knees impossibly closer to his chest. There was no point in lying now. "There hasn't been a single night where that day doesn't haunt me. I don't want to go to sleep-I can't. Every night is a sickening reminder of what happened. I-I can't."

Katsuki's chest felt heavy as he listened to Izuku's broken words. Quiet sobs escaped the greenette as he shook under his covers, feeling utterly hopeless. His secret has now been leaked, and he felt vulnerable. He gave Katsuki another reason to hate him-to make fun of him.

The blond didn't know what to do. He was already suspicious of Izuku's reasoning for throwing away the vitamins, but for that suspicion to be confirmed was a whole other deal. Katsuki wasn't good at comforting people. Hell, he wasn't good at feelings at all! But watching his childhood friend so broken in front of him, more broken than he had been earlier, struck a feeling that he couldn't decipher.

"Go ahead, make fun of me already!" Izuku suddenly exclaimed, catching Katsuki by surprise. His ruby red eyes widened as Izuku's sobs became louder. "Call me a crybaby, laugh at me for my pathetic excuse, force those vitamins down my throat like you said you would!"

Katsuki felt as if he had been slapped across the face, his fists clenched by his sides as he looked at the ground. Anger bubbled up inside him, but it wasn't directed at Izuku. It was directed at himself. Of course, Izuku would think he'd do that, that's what he always did. He would probably do it if he didn't have a huge weight of regret on top of his shoulders.

He stretched a hand towards Izuku, probably to try and comfort him, but he stopped. He didn't have the right to, after all that he's done. He felt like a complete asshole, which he was, and he hated it. Watching Izuku so vulnerable broke him, but, for some reason, he couldn't find it in him to admit it. His pride was far too big.

Muttering a silent curse, he bit the inside of his cheek and ran a hand through his spiky hair. Izuku's sobs seemed to quiet down if only a little. But the sadness radiated off of him in big waves, making the room appear darker than what it was. The greenette didn't want to break down in front of Katsuki, but he couldn't seem to stop the overflowing tears. He had finally admitted to someone what kept him up at night, and he was regretting it.

You pathetic boy, so weak and vulnerable. Can't even keep a secret. You should go suffer more than you already are. You shall be punished.

He needed to cut.

"Look, I promised the old lady that I would make sure you would get proper rest. I ain't going back on my word because of your stupid nightmares." Katsuki growled out after a minute of silence. Truth was, those weren't the words he had wanted to say. They just came out as if on autopilot. He was acting against his feelings. Feelings he didn't want to acknowledge.

Izuku let out a faint chuckle. Of course Recovery Girl had asked Katsuki since he was the one to be there at the time. How awfully coincidental.

"If you're not going to drink the vitamins, then you leave me no choice but watch over you until you fall asleep. I don't fucking care what shit you tell me, I ain't leaving. Although I swear to fucking god that I will force those vitamins down if you refuse to sleep." Katsuki spoke up once again, making Izuku's eyes widen. What?

The blond's eyes were trained on Izuku's back, waiting desperately for an answer. His tone was deep and serious, letting Izuku know that he wasn't joking around. He rarely did. It frightened Izuku in the slightest, feeling trapped. Katsuki would force him to sleep whether he liked it or not.

"Stop ignoring me, you shitty nerd!" Katsuki yelled, letting out small explosions out of his hands. This finally got a reaction out of the greenette, his body tensing up and sobs faltering to mere sniffles. Izuku reluctantly turned around in his bed, his eyes meeting Katsuki's hesitantly. The blond held his breath once his eyes made contact with Izuku's, silently grateful that there weren't tears leaving those green orbs.

Katsuki let out a small huff and crossed his arms, trying to hide his concern. His body was tense on the chair, watching the greenette intently. He was growing impatient. Izuku still hasn't said anything. He wondered what was going through Izuku's head. He wanted Izuku to rely on him.

After a few moments of silence, Izuku slowly climbed out of bed. Katsuki watched as he reached for the vitamins that were now on top of the desk, refusing to make eye contact with the blond. He didn't want to, but he opened the bottle and grabbed two gummies with his fingers. The fruity flavor of the gummies invaded his tastebuds and he chewed them, closing the bottle once again.

A frown was etched on Katsuki's features. He didn't like forcing Izuku to sleep, but he had to make sure Izuku would take care of himself. Getting proper rest was the first step.

"You can go to your room now," Izuku muttered, making his way back to his bed defeatedly. If taking the vitamins would release the burden that was now on the blonde's shoulders, then he would do so. He had been a burden for far too long. He didn't want to be anymore.

"Not before I make sure you're asleep," Katsuki muttered back.

Not before I make sure you're okay. He thought.

Izuku didn't answer, just gave a faint nod as he draped the covers back over his body. All the crying left him exhausted, so he didn't really need the vitamins to fall asleep at that moment. Barely ten minutes had passed when Izuku's soft snores could be heard. Katsuki let out a soft sigh, setting the alarm for Izuku for the next morning.

He made his way to the door quietly, turning the knob and opening it. Many things were going through his mind as he gave one last glance to his childhood friend. His gaze lingered on him for a moment before he stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him.