The other day a professor asked who was known for their war horses and I came very close to shouting Rohan. I’ll admit, I’ve spent some time watching LOTR (and Star Wars...and Pearl Harbor...and Forrest Gump...and Titanic), because I’m sick and have insomnia. Sue me.

But I’m not here to talk about that. Let’s talk about: Being Rude for the Hell of It

Why do people find it so hard to be polite? Honestly, why? Please. Thank you. You’re welcome. Those are some of the easiest words to say and yet people don’t know how to use them.

I seriously get made fun of all the time, because I say thank you after everything and that’s sad to me. It shouldn’t be strange that I try to be polite. Everyone should try it.

(Some of you are shocked that I'm nice in person, aren't you?)

There is never, under any circumstances, a reason to be rude to someone. I don’t care how rude they are to you first. I don’t care what they’ve done to you or the ones you care about. I don’t fucking care.

Treat others like you want to be treated.

Why do people try to be rude just for the hell of it? Do people honestly find joy in trashing people? I think it’s called “trolling” or something stupid like that. Why the hell would anyone want to do that? I’ll never understand, kids. Never.

Now I’m gonna tell you a story (because my best friend is highly stressed and hasn’t slept in days, so I don’t want to bother him with it. I’ll bother y’all instead and give you a lesson in courtesy.)

Usually, I wouldn't do this, but I’ll tell you what happened to me on the other writing site that I frequent.

For those of you that don’t know already, this rant, Pretty Little Bones, and another thing is also posted there as well as a personal email address where people can message me for critiques and such. And I know two or three of the people over there personally, so I guess there is some more (classified) information that gets circuited.  

But some girl that I don’t know decided she didn’t like me for whatever reason and she took it upon herself to make a public fiasco on my message board. And I have no idea who she is or where she came from or why she doesn’t like me.

It started when I sent a public message to everyone apologizing for my absence and promising to start getting my critiques done as soon as I felt better.

She apparently did not like this and decided to tell me that I’m very rude for making people wait and I was selfish because hospitals let you have computers so obviously I was just lying because I didn’t want to do the critiques I’d promised to do.

And I guess she was right. It is rude of me to make people wait. So I simply told her I was sorry to make everyone wait and that I like to give my full attention to people and their work, which I couldn’t do because I was sick.

Then she started asking me what was wrong with me and that’s just something I really don’t talk about in public. I would never wish for anyone to have to go through what I’m dealing with right now, so I don’t share. I DON’T want to burden others. They don’t deserve it at all. They have their own battles to fight. They don’t need to fight mine.

I told her it was a personal matter that I wasn’t comfortable discussing. And I apologized, because I always assume I’m to blame and lately I just apologize for everything.

Then one of my friend’s jumped in, which was a sweet gesture, but I absolutely hate how everyone on the internet thinks they need to be in a gang when there’s conflict. I was fine with her not liking me. I was going to let the rude girl have her little rant on my profile so she would feel better, apologize again, then we could both be on our way.

But this friend starts dragging in the old lines like “You don’t know what she’s going through, so you should just lay off” (which works both ways). And then the name calling started and I just could not believe it was happening.

I could not believe that these people could be so vile and vicious. I mean, one of them is my friend. And this friend started sharing the personal things I told her in confidence and I really didn’t appreciate that at all.

This all prompted the girl to ask: “wait. Were u in a mentle hospitle? I 4got ur one of those creepy anerexic gurls. Did u try 2 kill urself or sumthing?”

To which I simply said that I was sorry to not be able to soothe her curiosity and would appreciate keeping my personal life out of conversations. I could have gotten angry and bitched her out, but why? Being mean back to her wasn’t going to get me anywhere or make me feel better about anything. I have a conscience.

But she kept on with the “I wanna no. wut u do?”

Then some more people joined in and started name calling, making threats, and giving false compliments like “Addy’s strong and beautiful” and “she’s a better writer than you” and all this shit that has no merit or place in this conversation.

And another friend tries to give the sob story of my life and tells the girl that I’m kind to be giving critiques when I’m seriously ill. To which the other girl responded “if she sic its her falt.”

Then some other people decided to explain my condition, like everyone’s the same. I’ll admit, that pissed me off a little. But I stayed calm. Being mean is never the answer (unless you’re ranting ;D)

I sat there calmly saying that I appreciate the support but that I would like everyone to please leave the matter alone. The girl had every right to be upset with me if she truly wanted. And I also explained that no one should be rude to her, because we don’t know what she is going through in her life. Everyone is fighting a battle.

Then the rude girl starts insulting Pretty Little Bones, which was fine with me. She doesn’t have to like it. It’s totally fine. Obviously, I’m not a perfect writer. I’m not above criticism. It’s a good thing. I don’t want everyone to like it. I didn’t even want anyone to read it. (Don’t go read it now that I mentioned it. (I’m serious. Please don’t, I get so uncomfortable). This isn’t self-advertising.)

Then everyone starts freaking out and I just really wanted everyone to go away. It wasn’t that I was upset at all the personal attacks, it was that I was upset about how rude everyone was being.

I didn’t care that the girl didn’t like me or my stuff. That is her right. She could have been more polite about it but she wasn’t. There was no reason to be rude back, though.

And, we ended up at the debate that goes on over there about how much of Pretty Little Bones is true (which I hate).

And all this time the girl is saying nasty things about me and everyone was yelling insults at her.

Somewhere in there I had to leave for an emergency.

While I was gone, the girl was saying she was going to go kill herself because she has depression and everyone was picking on her. And a personal friend felt the need to say so what? Addy’s in terrible condition but she’s not making excuses. She’s being polite and helping people.

Then a debate about my health started with all the wrong facts and assumptions. So that was fun to read through (they even gave me an estimated date of how long I’m going to live (allegedly another couple of months if you were wondering)).

And the girl kept saying “bye. Goin to kill meself.”

And people were saying “no you’re not. You just want attention.”

And that went on for forever.

Fortunately, when I finally came back, the girl apologized and I told everyone to leave.

I forgave her, because it’s polite. And it’s really hard to offend me.

But I’m just ashamed of everyone that participated.

I understand they were only trying to help, but sinking to such a low level was inappropriate.

So this whole rant serves two points.

1.       I just really wanted to get this off my chest.

And

2.       Don’t ever be rude to someone. Even if they are rude to you. Don’t treat the world as badly as it treats you. Treat the world the way you want to be treated.

If you find a “troll” bothering you, ignore them. If your friend is being bothered, don’t just gang up on the troll. Tell the friend something nice about them. Tell them a joke or just make casual conversation.

It’s not hard to be polite.

I promise it doesn’t hurt.

(Also, please don’t talk about how rude the girl was. I know it was rude of her, but I have no idea. Maybe she was going through a rough time herself and just really needed to lash out. Everything is fine. I don’t need more name calling. )

And now I want to challenge you all to do something nice. Go leave a nice comment on someone’s story. Leave a little poem on their message board. Send a stranger a message with something inspirational.

Be nice.