Because Kennedy would be like her mother and this is something that I think she would want to know. Now with that vagueness, enjoy!

***********************************

Kennedy glared at the numbers as they ascended. All she wanted to do was go to her room, fall onto her bed, and scream into her pillow. Maybe after that, she'd kick the filling out of her punching bag.

It was better than kicking someone else. Like the person next to her that she currently loved but right then wasn't sure that love could overpower her storming emotions.

Harrison shifted and cleared his throat.

Kennedy tensed and continued to stare at the numbers, trying to hold it all in.

"Kenny, are you sure you're okay?"

"Harrison, I swear if you start becoming some hovering boyfriend I will literally end this relationship."

"Okay," Harrison said cautiously. "I am simply trying to voice a concern and a want to be able to do anything you might need."

Kennedy spun on him. "Don't! Okay, don't. I said I was fine so leave at that won't you!"

To his credit, Harrison didn't react but remained very still and Kennedy turned away, somehow more annoyed with his lack of reaction than if he'd yelled back at her. From the corner of her eye, she saw him remove his phone from his pocket and glance at the screen.

"Ah," he said. "Forgot what the date was. I'll be avoiding you for the next five days."

"What?!" Kennedy rounding on him. "Simply because I'm on my period somehow negates my want for you to not hover? My feelings can be valid no matter the date!"

Harrison nodded, looking calm and polite, which only made Kennedy want to kick something even harder and she was dangerously close for it to being Harrison.

"You aren't going to say anything?" Kennedy snapped.

"I've learned from history that silence and space are best in this situation."

"But you're my boyfriend now, shouldn't that mean you want to help me through this?!"

Harrison pressed his lips together and Kennedy wanted to scream because even she understood how she contradicted herself. Some girls got painful cramps, but no, Kennedy had inherited her mother's riotous emotions.

The doors to the elevator opened and Kennedy stormed out, knowing if she looked at Harrison any longer she'd do something she'd regret.

"I love you!" Harrison called out as she reached her door.

She shot him a sharp glare before she stepped inside her apartment.

The instance she did, she halted in her tracks. Six facts hit her right away.

First, music was playing in the apartment. Loudly. Though Kennedy might play her music in her room, rarely did music play in the main part of the apartment.

Second, the lyrics weren't even in English, they were in Korean. Kennedy only knew this because Sophia had shown her one of the K-pop bands she listened to.

Third, the smell of baking cookies filled the entire place.

Fourth, the cookies smelled good and not burnt.

The fifth, her mother was the one baking the cookies. Which made the fact that the cookies weren't burning an even bigger miracle.

Sixth, her mother was dancing. Kennedy couldn't think of the last time her mother had danced. She knew her parents sometimes would dance late at night in the living but her mother dancing in the kitchen was completely unexpected.

"Hey, Cadet," Carter said, turning towards her.

Kennedy didn't move, didn't speak. Even her raging emotions from seconds ago were momentarily forgotten at the unexpected sight. Carter slipped one pan of cookies onto the counter and stuck a second one into the oven. After setting a timer, she danced over to Kennedy.

Kennedy still didn't know how to react.

"How was your day?" Carter asked, taking Kennedy's hands and making her sway to the upbeat music.

"You're listening to K-pop," Kennedy said, not knowing why that question popped up first.

Carter laughed as she lifted one of Kennedy's hands and twirled underneath it.

"I am," she said. "Sophia said she'd appreciate it if I listened to her playlist and join in with something she enjoyed listening to." 

Kennedy felt a knot of guilt form in her stomach. She'd received that same request from Sophia but had only given it a half-hearted effort since not being able to understand the lyrics wasn't her vibe.

But here was her mother, who Kennedy couldn't have said what she listened to at all, had made an effort to connect with Sophia.

Kennedy pulled her hands out of her mother's grasp, her sour mood of before returning.

"I'm not really in the mood for this," she said.

That didn't dampen Carter in the least. She kept dancing but this time, she did it while tugging off Kennedy's backpack and blazer.

"That's what I'm here for," Carter said, putting the items aside. "To cheer up your mood!"

Kennedy crossed her arms, unmoved by her mother's boisterous attitude. Even if boisterous was never a word she'd attached to her mother.

"It's not the type of mood to cheer up," Kennedy said.

"Oh, I know exactly what time of the month it is today and have every intention of making it better!"

Carter spun and kept swaying in front of Kennedy. Though Kennedy had the rebellious want to not let her mother's happiness affect her, it was impossible. Her mother didn't smile, she beamed as if nothing in the world was wrong. Coming from a woman who'd seen the harsher side of life, this somehow had a greater impact.

"This isn't a normal occurrence for you when I'm on my period," Kennedy said. "Why now?"

Carter took Kennedy's hands again and danced with her as she slowly drew her into the kitchen.

"Because I love my daughter and thought, hmmm maybe I should show her that I love her, it has been seventeen years after all. It's about time."

Kennedy laughed. She lived in full awareness of how much her parents loved her. It was to such an extent that it could have been to the point of smothering if they weren't the type of people they were.

"I see and how did you plan to finally show me that you love me?" Kennedy asked.

"First cookies and then whatever you want."

Kennedy thought that was a good start, even if her entire body felt like it was a tornado of contradictory emotions.

"But first!" Carter said. "You look like you need to punch something. And though I would take a bullet for you, kill for you, I wouldn't actually take a punch from you."

Kennedy couldn't argue since she'd been seconds away from decking Harrison in the elevator. Carter towed Kennedy into her room.

"Change into something comfortable, being in a uniform will only make it all the worse," Carter said.

"I don't understand why I had to inherit your terrible emotions," Kennedy said, as she watched her mother pull out her boxing gloves.

"The mysteries of life."

It wasn't an answer but Kennedy wasn't sure there was an answer to why she felt the way she felt once a month. Changed into joggers and an oversized hoodie, Kennedy admitted to herself that it did help a little.

"So, did Harrison survive the day?" Carter asked, as she wrapped up Kennedy's hands and helped her put on her gloves.

"He's survived the past few years, why would I be different now?"

Carter smiled and cupped Kennedy's cheeks. "Because you're dating now. That means it's going to have more of an impact when you feel like hitting him or yelling at him."

"Yeah, well he survived. Barely."

Carter laughed and steered Kennedy to the punching bag.

"It will be something you work on and he adjusts to. Now have at it while I make sure your cookies don't burn."

As her mother left, Kennedy lined up her body and swung at the punching bag. The moment she pounded her fist into the leather a fraction of her riotous emotions eased. Blow after blow, she felt like she was able to rage against the raging storm inside. The emotions might not completely go away but at least she could release some of them.

"Feel better?" Carter asked, sticking her head into the room.

Kennedy nodded, her arms aching from her vicious attacks and her knuckles sore.

"Good, I have cookies ready."

Quickly, Kennedy removed her gloves and unwrapped her hands. Though she usually preferred her room to appear neat, a trait she knew solely came from her father, she left her things on her bed and walked back to the kitchen.

"Why are you really doing this today?" Kennedy asked.

Carter took the barstool next to Kennedy, placing a glass of milk and a plate of cookies between them.

"I had today off and I saw how you looked this morning. Added with being in a new relationship I figured it would be a rough day. I wanted to make it better if I could."

Kennedy understood that her parents weren't normal. They taught her weapon training, self-defense, situational analysis, and human sociology, among other things. Though she enjoyed all of those things, it was moments like this when she felt special.

"Thanks. You mentioned cookies and whatever I wanted. What does that imply?"

"Anything. We can watch cheesy romance movies? Go shopping, though online would probably be the most comfortable. Anything you want to do. It's a free pass today. So use it wisely."

Anything Kennedy wanted to do. She didn't even know what that would entail. As she thought, her mother dipped a cookie into her milk and ate half it. Kennedy looked at her. Though older, she seemed youthful in a way that never seemed put on or bought like other mothers she saw.

Kennedy had known her mother her entire life but still, she felt like there were mysteries to her that she would never know. 

"I see that look in your eye," Carter said. "Hit me with what you want."

For some reason, Kennedy had the feeling that a moment like this wouldn't easily come again. It wasn't that her mother wouldn't give her the things she asked for but there was something about this offer that felt special.

Kennedy knew she wouldn't have this moment again. She knew she didn't want any gift, any physical gift. No, what she wanted was the secrets her mother never shared with her but Kennedy had heard hinted at her whole life.

She rotated in her seat, facing her mother. Carter raised her eyebrows in a teasing and intrigued manner.

"Okay," Kennedy said. "I know what I want."

"It better be a good choice or I'm going to be disappointed in you."

"Oh don't worry, it's a good choice. One that I almost don't dare to request because you might fail in your offer."

"I said anything you want today is yours, name it. I won't back down."

"I want to know about the Castello case."

The instant the words left Kennedy's mouth, she saw the effect they had on her mother.

Though her mother maintained her calm, light expression, Kennedy could see how that spark in her eyes dimmed. It almost made her retract her request but she'd lived with the desire to know what this case had been about for years.

Every time she heard a hint of it, she felt the shift in her mother. She wanted to know why. She wanted to know what had happened. Why did one case above all others affect her mother? She wanted to not feel like she was a little kid that couldn't be told something. She didn't want to feel like a secret always lived between her and her mother.

"You know that's classified," Carter teased.

"You're no longer with the FBI and I won't tell anyone. Besides, it's been ages."

Kennedy held her mother's gaze, hoping she somehow saw how knowing this thing mattered to her in a way that she didn't know how to put into words.

Carter sighed. "Okay, but I'm not sitting on the barstools for this."

Grabbing the plate of cookies and her glass, she stood and walked to the living room couch. Kennedy hurriedly slipped off her seat and joined her, curling her legs up. Carter rested her head against her fist, not saying anything right away.

Kennedy sat waiting, watching her mother expectantly.

After a low breath, her mother spoke. "The case took place when I was twenty-four. There was this drug dealer family that we needed to get close to. I went undercover as a waitress at their club." She paused. "My cover name was Celeste."

"Celeste."

Her mother nodded.

"The Bureau needed someone to keep an eye on the Castello family and possibly get close. I handled myself well with previous cases and was given this one. I worked there for two months and got to slowly know the inner workings of the operation bit by bit."

Carter stopped, putting her fist to her mouth, and Kennedy waited. It seemed straightforward and along the lines of the other cases she'd heard her mother talk about. When Carter didn't go on, Kennedy tried to bear the silence but something about it felt heavy.

"How come it wasn't like all the other cases you easily cracked?" Kennedy asked.

Carter focused on Kennedy and for the first time in her life, Kennedy saw her mother look... fragile.

Rattled, Kennedy pulled her legs in and hugged them.

"I know you said you would tell me but it's okay if you can't," she said.

She had no idea what could have happened in the past that could leave such a scar on her mother and realized that maybe she didn't deserve to know. Some scars were too deep to share with others.

Carter smiled softly and Kennedy relaxed as the fragile look disappeared.

"I was only thinking," she said. "It's been a long time and this story has a good ending."

Kennedy wasn't sure about that since whatever happened had left decades-long effects. But she felt a little less nervous since despite everything her mother seemed to see the end worth the ordeal.

"So...?" Kennedy asked.

Carter rested her head on her fist again, to all appearances completely at ease.

"My cover was blown," Carter said. "The Castello's found out I was an agent and... they took me."

Kennedy tightened her grip around her legs, despite staring at her mother and knowing that she survived.

"Your father, Captain, and your uncles found me," she said, smiling, though Kennedy knew this smile hid what happened in the gap between being taken and found. "It was the first time I'd had my cover blown and faced... There were some repercussions, but everyone helped me through it."

That was not the happy ending.

Without it being said, Kennedy got the sickening feeling she knew what happened, but she still had the childlike hope she was entirely wrong.

"And the happy ending?" Kennedy said.

When her mother smiled this time, Kennedy believed it because her eyes focused on Kennedy and it was with a look of pure love. Carter tucked a strand of Kennedy's hair behind her ear.

"You are the happy ending," she said.

Kennedy? She was the happy ending? But her mother had been twenty-four, not thirty-two.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

Carter tugged Kennedy towards her and wrapped her in her arms. "Due to some of the things I faced, it wasn't positive that I would be able to have kids."

Kennedy hugged her mother back, wishing she'd been wrong about her assumptions but knowing she wasn't, not with her mother's statement. She felt the strength in her mother's arm and didn't know how she could still be so strong.

Carter kissed Kennedy's head. "But then I had you. My miracle baby."

Miracle baby...

"Did you want to have more kids?" Kennedy asked.

For a long moment, her mother didn't reply. "We had talked about it." She squeezed Kennedy. "We're happy that we got you."

Kennedy didn't say anything, trying to wrap her mind around a reality she'd lived with her whole life but finally understood the depth to. She hadn't been an only child by choice. The Evans only had one kid and so Kennedy had thought this normal. Sure, she had multiple cousins but somehow she hadn't thought about why that was different for her uncles to have multiple kids. If it had been up to her parents, she wouldn't have grown up an only child.

"Did you ever think of adopting?" Kennedy asked, wondering how different her life would have been with siblings, even if they weren't biologically related.

"We talked about it but with our jobs at the FBI and the certainty of our work, we knew we wouldn't be able to give the type of stability an adoptive child would need. We even talked to an adoption agent but hearing our past she came to the same conclusion."

"Your past?" Kennedy asked.

"The different... rough situations we've found ourselves in."

Kennedy pulled back, staring at her mother.

"Just how many rough situations have you been in?"

Carter smiled in a way that told Kennedy there were a million memories her mother thought of and she didn't think she'd get to know about any of them.

"Let's just say I would never wear a bikini even if it was my style."

Kennedy shook her head. "You and dad are both crazy."

"A little, yes. But that's what made us good partners."

"Yeah and given me completely unrealistic expectations for my future."

Carter cocked her head and arched her eyebrows. "You don't think you've already created a foundation with Harrison that could equal that to your father's and mine?"

At that question, all Kennedy could think of was the disastrous interaction in the elevator. With a groan, she fell back onto the couch.

"I don't think we'll make it after how I exploded on him," Kennedy said.

Carter laughed and jostled Kennedy's leg. "You only think that because your emotions are all over the place. Go and apologize, even take him some cookies and all will be forgiven."

Kennedy lifted her head. "Are you sure about that?"

"Trust me." She slapped Kennedy's leg playfully. "Go on. Go make sure you still have a boyfriend and best friend."

Kennedy clambered off the couch and grabbed the plate of cookies neither of them had eaten from. At the door, she looked back at her mother. She could easily picture how her mother had looked at twenty-four because, despite her age, she still looked youthful and strong.

Kennedy had grown up wanting to be her mother but now she realized she didn't want to be her, she wanted to go through the hard times in her life and show the same level of strength and courage as her.

"Thank you for telling me," she said.

Carter smiled and shooed her on. Kennedy knew with that gesture her mother was boxing up the past and putting it away. Kennedy accepted it, grateful she'd been given a glimpse into the box.

When she knocked on the Evans' door, Harrison opened it but didn't look nervous to see her. That definitely felt like a good sign after her outburst.

"Are you here to yell at me or kiss me?" Harrison asked.

"You think it will be either one?"

"I texted your dad and he said it's usually those extremes."

Kennedy shoved the plate of cookies into Harrison's hands. "Well, it's cookies."

"Pity, I would have liked that kiss."

"Do you want me to yell at you?"

"If it ends with you kissing me, then sure."

At Harrison's grin, Kennedy thought about yelling at him for being so annoyingly blasé but realized she was grinning herself.

"You're so annoying," she said.

"Say that louder and that should count."

Shaking her head, Kennedy took hold of his shirt and kissed him. When they broke apart, she gazed up into his eyes. He kissed her once more lightly.

"I'm not going anywhere," he said.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

**********************************************************************

Altogether now: awwwww! 😍

Well at least some of you did it, for those of you who just rolled your eyes, you need to work on your team work okay or this dream of being an imagery team will never be.

Alright alright, mother-daughter bonding time! What are the tiny tinny thoughts tumbling tremendously around your head? 💭💬🗯🧈

(Does that make sense? Does it make you sound like you're the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz? Kinda but I have a heart big enough to share between the two of us. What am I even saying right now, I should really stop...)

Okay, ignore the above aside note (huh?) the paragraph above, that is what I'm talk about...

*takes a deep breath, swerves over three lanes to get back on the right track*

Right we've left the wrong lane and are correctly where we should be... an author's note that make sense.

So...

Carter is cute as a mom right? Yeah, that was pleasant and slightly unexpected but that's also expected of Carter nothing expectable except the unexpected.

😂😅 I apologize it's been a bit of a week and when I say 'bit' I mean a slice so big that it's nearly crushed me but it's okay because since I used the word slice it's easy to imagine being crushed by a slice of cake and that's not too bad. I can just eat my way out of my troubles...

Oh that doesn't had healthy but getting out of my troubles is key to unlocking the next day and so it's a door I should go through and not think about the consequences of eating cake as a means of escape.

Great! I've never not made any more sense then this nonsense right here. This is why no one should ever eat and write!

Legit, I'm sorry for the firestorm that was this author's note. *bows* I'll work harder next time.

Vote, comment, follow or eat cake but hopefully for fun and not for escape.

Comments that brightened up my week and that came from: Mason's Birthday (Mason's POV)

Also if you dare, I found a representation of how Carter would generally look right now. It's at the bottom so the choice is yours to scroll down and see and have your mental image of her broken.

We all thought that! Even me!

We should all cry for him even though he'd laugh at us for doing so.

Sure that makes sense.

Also not from the chapter but so great it had to be shared.

👏👏👏 love it!

Next there will be a pic of a lioness taking care of her cub then the pic of Carter how she looks now. This is your second warning if you don't want to ruin the image in your mind.

Here is kinda how Carter would look now.

She so purrrrty!