Despair.

It comes a time in every man's life where one must face a great challenge, no matter how great the despair and loss that comes with facing it is. In Ryuuga's case, it was screwing off to New York right before semester finals; in Yuuto's case, it was probably stop wanting to return to the womb; and in Jeb's case, it was not having food when he wanted to eat.

But in Izuru's case, the challenge was learn how to live alongside the smug loli that had been thrown into his life with all the subtleness of someone trying to flex with two trains and then locking himself into not being able to attack.

Even after fighting foes like Endo and Kagekiyo, Izuru's biggest enemy still ended up being Harui. She took his bedroom, she took the chance to cuddle with his girlfriend, and then she even took his favourite cereal. And they haven't even been living together for a full day.

But amidst the despair of dealing with Ibuki's little sister, a great tragedy would, sooner than anyone could have guessed, lay down the building blocks for their bond.

And by sooner, of course I mean the very next day. But it wasn't just any regular day.

It was the day of the Tokyo Soup Incident.

Despite sounding like some type of idiotic thing that shouldn't have happened under Endo's watch in Heiwa, it actually started in Shinjuku Tech.

The classes for the day had ended, but since she got stuck with classroom cleaning duty, Ibuki stayed behind. While she could have just gone back home after being done with the cleaning, she decided to stop by the storage room where she hung out with her friends, since she knew Nakano and Junpei were still there.

"Heyo, losers! The great Ibuki-sama came to check on you two!" Ibuki laughed as she stepped into the room, closing the door behind her. "Are you two really just sitting here in silence..."

Indeed they were. Nakano was on the couch, reading the newest volume of Voyager, while Junpei sat near the wall so that no one could see what he was looking at in his phone.

"You're still here? Thought you'd go back home in a heartbeat." Junpei said, briefly looking up at Ibuki. "Actually, didn't you get a job?"

"Yeah but they're waiting for better weather to do the summer season shooting." The white haired girl sighed, grabbing herself a chair and then sitting down. "And honestly, I need a break from home..."

"Love problems?" Nakano asked. "Sorry but I can't offer any help on that. My lack of knowledge on the matter was enough to lose in all the visual novels Yasuke has borrowed me."

"Well, yeah, but actually no, but super yeah... Harui-chan's living with us now and she and Izuru have been... Well..."

"Did he dropkicked the child?" Junpei asked.

"What? Of course not! Izuru would never-"

But before she could finish, Junpei and Nakano looked up to stare at her with a look of disappointment.

"Shut up... But no, he hasn't dropkicked Harui... Yet... They've just been fighting all the time, you know? They got off to a really sour start and things haven't gotten any better."

"How sour are we talking?" Nakano asked.

"Did anyone ever told you that you should knock on the door before opening the bathroom door?"

"Yikes." Junpei whistled.

"Yup... And it doesn't help that he traded his bike for some dying car to make things easier now that it's three of us... They fought about what to make for dinner, they fought about who would sleep in the bedroom, they fought about with who I'd sleep with, then they fought about whose turn it was to use the bathroom this morning, they fought during breakfast and then they even fought when walking to the train station... And to make things worse, Harui's school is in the same zone as Heiwa, so he walked her there, and there's no way they didn't fight while doing that! I just want them to get along, she's my sister and he's my b... B-b-b... Boy... B-boy..."

"So the Christmas bravado truly ended, did it not?" Nakano asked with a small sigh. "I wish it had died before you forced me to make that entire budget plan."

"Christmas bravado?" Junpei asked.

"Our relationship was off to a great start, I can't stress that enough, but after leaving his parents' house and going back to our old place, things just got a bit... Slower, to say the least..." Ibuki sighed. "How did you get to this, Nino, you're talking about love with two losers who've never touched a woman..."

"I don't have the time for a girlfriend. Or the social skills to get one." Nakano said.

"And I don't need one. I'm fine crushing little meta decks with Giraffa."

Poor choice of words, Junpei. Poor choices of words.

"Yeah, meta this, meta that, have you ever met-a fucking girl before?" Ibuki deadpanned. "Anyway... That's why I'm staying here for a bit before going back home."

"You need help solving that sudden delay in your relationship." Nakano said.

"Yeah, no shit, Ren! Of course I know that! But like... What if I just make it weirder? What if Izuru likes how things are now and I ruin that?!"

"I can assure you he doesn't. He has expressed interest in developing your relationship. Not to how it was at the start, but at least enough for you two to be able to go out together without it being weird."

As Nakano explained that, he opened his text app in his phone and scrolled up until he reached Izuru saying something along the lines of what Nakano said.

"Huh, I'm surprised he's talking about this to your instead of Tate or Ban, but to give him some credit, the booger eater probably wouldn't be of much help and that rich ape would just flex how well things between him and Yumi-chan are go- Guh! Holy shit! There's so many memes here!"

"Oh, that's something between me and Izuru-san. His type of comedy is really appealing. I usually look at these meme things he does to relax while studying. He says that these aren't just memes. They're the DNA of the soul." Nakano explained.

Despite not saying anything, Junpei briefly looked at Nakano with a raised brow, before going back to scrolling on his phone.

"Why the hell did I suggest him that game..." Ibuki sighed, refering to a game only those of superior taste would ever play. "Wait, what's this one about? It's just Topaz Witch, PiPi and Cobalt Witch, PuPu."

"Hm." Nakano shrugged, but in reality, behind those tired eyes of his, he was struggling to not start laughing like a little kid.

"HAH!" Junpei coughed, almost letting out a laugh that'd reveal how mature his sense of humour is.

"Okay, what are you looking at on your phone? You've just been there, occasionally speaking, focusing on whatever's on the screen!"

Ibuki walked over to her classmate and grabbed him by the wrist of the hand that he used to hold his phone. With a strong pull, Ibuki pulled Junpei's arm up enough to get a look at what he was seeing, but that was her mistake.

"WAIT, DON'T!" Junpei exclaimed.

"HOLY SHIT, THAT'S A FAT PAIR OF TITS! WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT PORN IN SCHOOL?! EW EW EW EW, THAT'S NASTY!" She cried, rushing to hide behind Nakano.

"Is that true?" Nakano asked, looking at his underclassman. He didn't seem mad, just terribly disappointed.

"I'm not looking at porn! These are... Well... These are my... G-girlfriend's..."

"Huh?" Nakano and Ibuki said, both tilting their heads.

With a very confused look in their eyes, Ibuki and Nakano stared at Junpei, but soon, they got all giddy and began chuckling at the situation.

"You almost got us there, Junps!" Ibuki giggled.

"No woman would actually date a teenager boy who spends his time playing with insects and plastic belts." Nakano chuckled.

"Yeah laugh now, but I can assure you we're handling things better than you and that hand throwing freak." Junpei said, staring at the two with dead eyes.

But that's when disaster struck!

"SENPAI!" Yasuke cried.

The student trio inside the room looked back. Yasuke stood in front of the door, with a sickly looking in his face. His legs were shaking, and he could barelly take another step. But even so, he managed to gather what remain of his spirit to stumble towards Nakano and fall on his feet.

"What now, Yasuke?" Nakano asked. He didn't seem very shocked by this.

"Did you found out some V-Tuber had a personal life? Go touch some grass." Junpei sighed.

"Heh, asshole..." Yasuke groaned. "But it's not that... I made a massive mistake, senpai... Beware of the... Tell my sister she can't... Sell my stuff for the money I took from her for my superchats... And tell Noel-chan that... She was the best goddamn V-Tuber I could have asked for... Bleh."

Having spoken his final words like a true man, Yasuke fell silent.

"Yasuke? Hey, Yasuke? Yasuke? YASUKE!" Nakano shouted.

"He probably just crossed the final line with his sister's credit card and she poisoned his food or something." Ibuki shrugged.

"Hey, idiots..."

A new visitor came by the storage room. It was Masao, the vice-president of the student council, and he too looked sick. He barelly managed to stay up, but by pushing the left side of his body against the side of the door, he managed to support himself for the time being. He also had both arms around his torso.

"Did any of you have the soup today...?"

"What the hell are you talking about, Sachi?" Junpei asked.

"Heh, your funeral then... Tell Shin that his head was... Much shinier than any of our futures..." Masao muttered, sliding down the wall until he hit the ground. "So much time learning Tilaipse only to never rub it on that bitch's face..."

Ibuki and Nakano glanced at each other, and then back at Junpei. With the same mindset, the three poked their heads out of the storage room, and were faced with a nightmarish image.

Students and teachers alike ran from one side to the other, either holding their bellies or covering their mouths, in search of the nearest bathroom or trash can. Some few didn't manage to last that long, and ended up throwing up their lunch in the hallways.

In the middle of it all was the legend with the shiny head, Shin, who had his hands in his pocket and was walking by the storage room. He looked down on Masao and shook his head.

"So it got to you too, Masao... It'll take time, but I'll eventually get over your passing." Shin said, bowing.

"I'm still alive, you hundred yen store Buddha..."

"What the hell is going on, Baldie?!" Ibuki asked. "What's this soup thing this loser talked about?!"

"You haven't heard? Today, the soup sold on the cafeteria was special. It was ordered from this neat little restaurant in Minato. It was very popular, and tons of people, students and teachers alike got themselves a bowl of it. I used my power as the student council president to get myself seven bowls. The soup was delicious." Shin explained.

"Huh, yeah, I know, I ate one too, what about it?"

"Turns out that the soup wasn't completly fine, and all those who've had it have been throwing up left and right. I fear for those who had more than one serving..."

"Huh? Hey pres, are you alright?" Junpei asked.

He wasn't.

Behind his cool shades, Shin's eyes were wide open, and he was trembling like a furless cat left out in the winter. He was giving it his all to hold back from joining the affected ones, but every man had his limits.

"Oh, don't mind me. I think I need to urinate."

And with that, Shin power walked out of there and to the nearest toilet. Yeah, he was going through the same.

"Wait, but if you had the soup too, shouldn't you be throwing up your insides, Ibuki?" Nakano asked.

"Now that you mention it..." Ibuki hummed. She gave it some thought, but then her eyes widenned as she arrived at a terrifying conclusion. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Don't throw up on my shoes, they were a present!" Junpei shouted.

"Aren't your shoes in your locker?" The upperclassman asked.

"Oh, right... Fight or flight response."

"It's not that! I'm feeling completly fine! See, the thing is, Harui loves alot, right?! Like, since little, she had a thing for eating soup, specially if it came in a can! So, I thought, the soup came from a place in Minato, that's where Heiwa is, so I texted Izuru to get some when he got off school, because maybe that could bring the two closer, but now I might just make my sister and my b-b-b-b- R-roommate blast their guts out! Oh god, oh shit, oh fuck!" Ibuki screamed, pulling out her phone and calling Izuru.

But his phone was down.

"SON OF A BITCH, WHY AM I PAYING FOR YOUR PHONE PLAN IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA ANSWER?!"

"If I remember right, the next train should be coming shortly and it's leaving for Minato." Junpei said, looking at his wristwatch.

"When did you get that?" Nakano asked.

"It was a present from my girlfriend, who does exist. She just goes to another school."

"OH QUIT IT YOU, WE BOTH KNOW THAT A GIRLFRIEND GOING TO ANOTHER SCHOOL MEANS SHE ISN'T REAL! SEE YOU LOSERS, I HAVE A CRISIS TO AVOID!"

And so, with her bag under one arm, Ibuki ran out of Shinjuku Tech, dodging the multitude of students and teachers praying to whatever god they believe in to smite them down and save them from this suffering.

Proving that you don't need three episodes of running to arrive at your destination, Ibuki quickly arrived at the train station, where she caught the first train to Minato, and then made her way to Heiwa in a dash.

As she approached the front gates, she noticed Tate and Ban, but ran past them without paying them much attention.

"Was that Ibu-chan?" Tate asked.

"Huh, wonder why she's here. Maybe she wants to join in on the festival stuff?" Ban replied, shrugging.

After running through the halls and arriving at the first floor, Ibuki slid into Izuru's classroom, calling out for him.

"IZURUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!"

But guess what, he wasn't there. The only person there was Murata, that guy from last volume who scored a hot chick before Izuru was even done with Endo. He just looked at Ibuki with a confused look.

"You! Clearly virgin mammal! Where's the hot piece of ass that sits by the window?!"

"Y-you mean the student council president?"

"What? No! I mean Sawada!"

"Oh... Sawada-san went home already. He mentioned there was no council work or club activities to do today so he said he was going to buy some soup and go home early."

"...FUCK!"

And then, one marathon, one wait for the train and one train ride back to Ikebukuro followed by a second marathon, Ibuki finally got home. She kicked open the door, and without even taking off her shoes, she rushed to the living room, where, to her relief, Izuru and Harui sat on the couch, each holding a bowl full of soup.

"DON'T EAT THE SOUP- Oh... Oh thank god, you guys haven't had the soup yet..." Ibuki sighed in relief.

But then, Izuru and Harui looked at Ibuki with the same look in their eyes: absolute horror.

"...I got out of school earlier and bought some but then ate it all..." Izuru explained. "So when I went to pick Harui from school, we went to get some more..."

"This was about to be my second bowl..." Harui muttered.

"And this would probably be my seventh... Why shouldn't we eat the soup...?" Izuru asked.

Ibuki stared at the two, now she too showing nothing but horror in eyes, but before she could given them an answer, a terribly feeling flared up in her stomach, and she rushed to the empty sink, where she began unloading everything she ate that day.

"...why shouldn't we eat the soup, Neetama...?" Harui asked.

You can beat the blonde ape once expelled for treating his homeroom teacher like bread dough in the desperate need of a hard kneading.

You can beat the divorced headmaster commanding your school into becoming the finest one in the country whose daughter and ex-wife you got this close to nailing.

You can even beat the weirdo saying he doesn't want to follow his family's commands and then change his mind because of how fine Kasumi's honkers looked in that wedding dress.

But in the end, it doesn't matter.

Food poisoning caused by a soup you thought was tasty enough to eat six bowls of it like a dumbass will put you down all the same.

Being the lucky and healthy gal she is, Ibuki avoided the food poisoning with a good night of sleep, but Harui, having a small body, didn't have the same luck. In the morning after what would become nationally known as the Tokyo Soup Incident because of all the people gushing their guts out, poor Harui was on the couch, wrapped in a blanket to keep herself warm.

And Izuru? He had it even worse. His asakusan stomach didn't help making things any easier, to the point where he became a volatile fluid dispensing machine. From both ends. He was laying on his futon in the living room, covered in a couple of blankets and even wearing a face mask for good measure. If only americans were like you.

"How the hell did Neetama avoid the same sad fate we got..." Harui groaned, looking through the different channels on television to find something to watch.

"She once told me she ate yogurt and drank milk everyday to stay fit as a fiddle, but I thought she meant that jokingly... I need to invest in more yogurts and milk..." Izuru replied, shivering under his covers.

"I jokingly, JOKI- Geh, it hurts when I raise my voice... This sucks..."

"I dodged having to contribute to the festival brainstorming but at what cost... I can already imagine Tate suggesting something really russian or Aimi suggesting something that'll get her alot of food in exchange of no money..."

Aimi suggesting an eating contest with various types of food so that she could keep forking it down her throat and while Tate didn't suggest anything russian, Ban poked his head into the classroom to suggest doing a stage play of the Nutcracker. Both ideas got vetto'd on the spot, end of story.

"Festival?"

"Yeah... Our stupid headmaster delayed the sports and culture fests because of tiny whisks eating the budget and now he's repaying for it by holding this week-long festival at the end of the month... What an idiot, no wonder I almost nailed his ex-wife..."

"Do you say whenever you get the chance?"

"Hell yes... Hey, brat? How old are you again...?"

"I'm a not a brat, you stupid- Guh... I'm a first year at middle school..."

"...man..." Izuru groaned loudly. "I really saw some brat's stuff before seeing my girlfriend's for a second time... The world doesn't give me shit hands in card games but it gives them to me at everything else..."

"You don't deserve to go to jail, you deserve the death penalty." Harui huffed, glaring down on Izuru.

"Give it a sec, whatever's left of that damn soup in me will do the job in the next five or ten minutes... Honestly, why soup... Why couldn't your favourite food be anything else?"

"Soup's the best. It's warm, it's easy to eat, and you can make it in so many different ways... But canned soup? Now that's the stuff... It only takes knowing how to use a stove and the job's done. Hell, you can even make it with a microwave if you don't mess up the settings!"

"Too sick to go to school but not sick enough to gush about liquid vegetables..." Izuru sighed. "Sounds to me like you're just lazy to make yourself actual food. By that logic, my favourite food's whatever I can eat without putting in any work."

"Ah?! Don't go dissing my soup, loser! Besides, I have another to like soup... It's because... It's because it's the only thing Neetama ever cooked for me..." Harui admitted, blushing slightly.

"When you put it like that..."

But that's when something weird clicked in Izuru's brain.

"Wait, come again?"

"What? Canned soup is the only thing Neetama knows how to make. Like I said, aslong as you know how to work a stove or pick the right settings in a microwave, even the most clueless chefs can make it."

"What do you mean the only thing she knows how to make? Huh?"

"Are you... Are you for real...? Neetama can't cook to save herself. Well, that's not entirely true, she somehow is able to eat the junk she whips up... Here, look at this."

Grabbing her phone and scrolling through the pictures Ibuki sent her over time, Harui clicked on a photo of one of Ibuki's dishes and showed it to Izuru.

"D-dear god..."

What presented itself on that screen shook Izuru to his very core. Either that or the soup.

It was a bowl of fried rice, mixed with some leftover fried chicken, some wienners that hadn't fully cooked, and something that Izuru couldn't for the life of himself figure out what it was. It was mushy, with a weird colour that he had a hard time telling apart from grey and very pale pink, and some bits of carrot and meat mixed with it.

"You didn't know?"

"I, huh... I've always been the one who cooks here... She never made anything... At least while I was around... I always thought it was because she was lazy but dear god..."

After that dark revelation about Ibuki's skills in the kitchen, roughly two hours passed, and neither of them had started feeling any better. Harui had just spent her time watching television, and while Izuru wanted to get some farming down, his poor state made him unable to touch gacha. And probably unable to touch some grass.

But as the two enjoyed their time in silence, both their stomachs began grumbling.

"Izuru, I'm hungry..." Harui weeped. "Go make us lunch..."

"I'm too sick for that, go make it yourself..." Izuru replied.

"I'm too small to reach the spices and the pans! And I'm too scared to use the stove!"

"Then just microwave soup..."

"We don't have soup. And soup is what got us here in the first place!"

"Hngh...!!! Fine!" He deadpanned, giving it his all to sit up. "Then our only option's simple... Let's go buy some cheap bento from the nearest convinience store! Hnghhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Why are you making that sound?"

"It hurts to get up, give me a hand!"

Fifteen minutes of struggling to get Izuru up and one dressing montage later, Izuru and Harui walked out of the house, both wearing sunglasses to hide the sick look in their eyes, and only Izuru wearing a mask. As they reached the car, Harui extended her arm.

"Wait. I don't think you're in any condition to drive."

"...good point. Also, I forgot my wallet."

And another ten minutes of trying to get up the stairs just for Harui to be the one to go get rhe wallet and one walking montage later, the sickily duo got to the nearest convinience store, the one where Izuru and Ibuki got fried chicken when taking out the trash on tuesdays. Usually that trash is the Lyric 2 reveals.

The two immediately power walked to the bento section, and using their three combined brain cells, they came up with a brilliant idea: Izuru would scout the higher shelves while Harui kept an eye on the lower ones. Height strats, people, height strats.

"Yuck, there's so much seafood options today... I was hoping to get some protein." Izuru said.

"Yeah, because that will matter when you're what shows up when people look up the meaning of lazy." Harui deadpanned and picked up a bento. "Ooooh! Look, look! This one has a panda made out of rice and seaweed!!"

"A panda? For real? God, you're really a ki- Holy crap, they got one with two koales made from rice!"

"Hmmmm? Who's the kid now?" The little girl asked, looking up at Izuru with that smug loli smile.

"This means nothing! Also I'll deny it if you tell anyone about this!"

"The great Harui will cover your sorry ass, don't worry about it. But only if you buy snacks too! I looked into the snacks section and they have my favourite cookies!"

"Last time I bought cookies, Tate almost ran me over with his big slav feet..." Izuru sweatdropped. "Which ones are you talking about?"

"The Kitty Cat Buttermilk Chocholate Chip Cookies!"

"Come again?"

Dumbfounded by that being the actual name of the brand, Izuru followed Harui to the snacks aisle. That brand of cookies were kept in a shelf Harui couldn't reach, and as luck would have it, only one box remained. Izuru reached for it, but they were taken from him before his very eyes.

The thieves were a group of booger-filled middle schoolers, looking to be on their second and third years by their height, all wearing the same red uniform. But it wasn't a school uniform. It was a gang uniform. There were about seven of them, and the leader was visible for being an ugly ass mole right under his chin.

"You just got cucked by the great Wild Mantis of Ikebukuro, you loser! Some piece of loser shit like you doesn't need these cookies, they're for real men like us! And this store's ours, so beat it! Take your stupid little sister and go shop somewhere else, you dick-sucking factory worker!"

Laughing, the seven ding dongs walked out of the store, without even paying for the Kitty Cat Buttermilk Chocholate Chip Cookies, who the hell made that the brand name, sue that guy.

"Tch, stupid wannabe gang members, they should go touch grass and take a bath..." Harui clicked her tongue. "Come on, let's go pay for these and go back home. Those bastards ruined the trip here."

(Media - The Only Thing They Fear Is You)

But Izuru had other plans. As they left, he followed them with his narrowing eyes. They were hanging out in the store's small parking lot with their bikes.

"Go pay for the bentos and the cookies." Izuru said, leaving his bento and wallet with Harui.

"Huh? W-what the hell are you going to do?!"

The time had finally come.

After years of waiting, this beautiful day arrived, and all it took was being cockblocked from nailing someone's mom and catch food poisoning.

"What I was born to do."

That's right.

After all these cruel years, Izuru finally had a reason to beat up some kids.

He walked out of the convinience store, tossing his white jacket aside, and walked towards where the gang had parked their bikes.

Noticing the incoming chance to lynch some loser who didn't get the hint, the gang leader grinned and nodded at the guy who had his back turned to Izuru, but that didn't really matter.

The moment that poor bastard looked back, he got smacked with the sickest right hook to the nose. The poor bastard fell to the ground, bleeding from his nose and writhing in pain.

One loser down, six to go.

"Holy shit, what the fuck?!"

One of the gang members yelled before what he saw, but he was next. He got hit a tasty roundhouse to the face and smacked onto his bike. Izuru wasn't mad at that specific guy for stealing Harui's snacks, he was mad because he had a bike while he had to walk or take the train to places.

But anyway, that's two accidental fetuses out of the way.

"Motherfucker! Kill that fucker!" The leader commander.

A guy that was to Izuru's left tried to charge at him, but Izuru rightfully smacked him into the ground with a sick Nakano-inspired kick, and while the guy to Izuru's right tried to do the same, Izuru just grabbed him and tossed him into a nearby trash can.

Four broken condoms down.

One of the three remaining gang members, a chubby kid who really didn't want to be there after four of his buddies got smacked by some dude with shades and a mask, began to hootfoot his way out of there, but Izuru, in his infinite wisdom, chased after him, and tackled him into a car that was parked nearby.

Five unwanted births out, only two remaining.

From the store, Harui watched in disbelief with her jaws dropped. She had heard from Ibuki that Izuru liked throwing hands, but she didn't know he was cool enough to beat up middle schoolers.

Izuru turned back to face the reamining two wannabe tough guys, and took off his shades to get a better look at the losers who dared to steal the cookies.

"Fuck are you waiting for?! Go get his ass!" The leader yelled.

The last of the regular gang members charged at Izuru, but he really didn't seem to have learned anything from the other five. His charge was stopped by Izuru grabbing his head and then pushing it down while bringing his knee up, giving him the taste of the stank of Izuru's sweatpants. Take that as you will.

"Wha... What the hell do you want from us?!" The guy asked, crying for having his first kiss with some guy's knee.

Now that got a reaction out of the scary asakusan man. He narrowed his eyes and slammed his foot down on the back of the crying child.

"Give me the goddamn Kitty Cat Buttermilk Chocholate Chip Cookies!"

"The only thing your ass is getting from this is a hole!" The leader called out, drawling his pocket butterfly knife and swinging it around to show his moves. "You're about to get stabbed by the god of the knife, the unbeatable, ungodly, Rokujin!"

Taking advantage of the fact that his opponent was only showing his knife skills to prove he got no maidens, Izuru crouched and looked through the pockets of the kid that tasted his knee and grabbed his phone.

"Knives are lame, real men use their hands!"

In an act of being smart and more scared of his student council president then some child with a sharp stick, Izuru threw the phone at that Rokujin kid, smacking him so hard in the forehead that he got pushed to the ground and lost his knife. The phone then fell on the ground and broke.

"My gacha games, I didn't make a data link..." The middle schooler cried.

"Cry about it." Izuru said.

And that's seven beaten up kids. God, this narrator job is the best.

As Izuru walked over to Rokujin and crouched over him to looked through his pockets, Harui ran out of the store, her eyes gleaming with excitment.

"Holy shit! That was awesome!" Harui exclaimed.

"Remember, Harui: violence is not the solution. It's a question and the answer is yes." Izuru said, sighing in relief.

"W-what are you looking for...?!" Rokujin asked.

"These." The black haired replied, taking out the box of cookies and Rokujin's phone from his jacket. He tossed the cookies at Harui, and then got out his own phone. "Let's see, list of contacts- Wow, this is emptier than a wasteland, you're really a loser."

"W-what do you want from my contact list?!"

"And got it. I just wrote down your mom's number and I'll be giving her a son she'll actually love if you steal our snacks again!"

"That was awesome! What now?!" Harui asked.

"...we run the hell out of here before the cops show up."

And with bentos and snacks at hand, Izuru and Harui got the hell out of there before the authorities, which really hadn't been called but better be careful, could show up. They had to stop at a bridge for Izuru to vomit after all that moving around, but then they got home and had their lunch.

Later that day, Ibuki arrived home to the two sitting on the kotatsu and joined them right away. It was already dark outside, but the photoshoot for her modeling gig took some extra time because she couldn't put on a serious face to save her life. Beginner's thing.

"And then he tackled that fat bastard into some random loser's car! It was the best!" Harui exclaimed.

"Really? Beating up kids? A man of your poor record?" Ibuki asked, looking at Izuru with a grin. She was only teasing to hide how happy she was that Izuru and Harui had finally begin bonding.

"You knew what you were getting into." Izuru joked. He was looking healthier already. "How was the photoshoot?"

"Ahah, I'm still getting the ropes of it so we got more stuff to do tomorrow... But get this! So many people from Shinjuku had to stay home because of the soup thing that we basically did whatever we wanted today!"

"Oh dude, that never happens in my school!" Izuru and Harui weeped.

"And sooooo, knowing how my preciously cute little sister and b-b-b-b-b- Asakusa guy that cooks were probably too sick to cook dinner..."

A feeling of terror filled Izuru and Harui as Ibuki began talking and looking through her school bag. They put two and two together, in this case that being her words and actions, and arrived at the same conclusion.

And sadly for them, they were right. Ibuki took out three bentos from her bag.

"I made dinner for us at school! Let's eat!" Ibuki giggling, showering the two with her brightest smile.

Izuru and Harui slowly opened their bento and looked at the food. Their worst nightmare came true. It was fried rice, mixing with some meat and poorly chopped green onions. They could deduce the meat came from a can, because of its shape.

Though they disagreed on alot of things, Izuru and Harui agreed on one thing: Ibuki's smile is just too darn cute to say no to.

"Thank you for the meal..." The two said, looking at the food to hide the despair in eyes from Ibuki.

And after that hearty meal, Izuru and Harui recieved a very special gift.

A second day of being at home because of food poisoning.