For @hunnie_boo  Thank you for your funny comments and reading. You always make me laugh❤️

- Four days till the ceremony - 

I stepped out of the bathroom, showered. I was honestly tiring of the colour white. Everything in my room was entirely composed of white from the soaps to all the clothes I was given. It was everywhere and made everything just seem... endless and hopeless. Like there was no way out.

I stopped in my tracks. On the side table, there was a woven wooden basket with a cover secured on, clearly placed there when I was in the bathroom. I tore the lip off, hoping it was what I thought it was, and smiled when I saw the contents.

Neatly organised were a few water bottles and some items skilfully wrapped in brown paper with string tying it closed. I picked one up tentatively and examined it. It felt like some kind of bread, a food that was long-lasting and a long-term source of energy which would help me as I didn't know how long it would take me to reach civilisation if I ran from here. I rummaged through the contents of the basket and saw a note from, I presume Amara.

'For when you are hungry and do not have food'.

I stared at the cursive writing, suspiciously. She was definitely sending mixed signals. Was she encouraging me to escape or not? I placed the note on the side and noticed a little flap in the basket. As I pulled it up, I noted a small medical box, with a prominent red plus sign. I opened the box and saw plasters, bandages and antiseptic. There was another note telling me to use it wisely with a winking emoticon.

Not suspicious at all.

I looked at the finger where Mikhail had bitten me and sighed at the thin scab left behind. I did not want any remnants from him in my body but I wasn't going to use the plaster on it as I didn't want to raise any questions about where I got the plaster from.

Someone knocked on the door sharply, making me jump slightly. Judging by the single knock it was probably Jacob - also, no one else was allowed to see me. I shoved the basket underneath my bed, and quickly put on some clothes, tying my thick wet hair into a sloppy bun. I opened the door, slightly out of breath to see a miserable Jacob.

"Your ceremonial robes measurements are to be taken today. Follow me".

Would it kill him to be polite?

I nodded anyway and followed him, falling into step rather than trailing behind him like I usually do. He grunted but said nothing, leading the way. We walked and walked, taking twists and turns through doors I had never seen it before, making me wonder how I had never seen them before. There were hardly any people about but those that did see me gave me the same cold shoulder treatment.

"How long till we get there?" I asked, slightly childishly but mostly because the silence was becoming unbearably awkward and my feet were starting to hurt. His moodiness hung over us like a grey could, making the atmosphere stifling and uncomfortable.

He ignored my question and marched on ahead making me increase my pace. Sighing, I fell back into silence, pondering my situation. My conversation with Amara hadn't been entirely useless; I had learned that this ceremony would cause me an awful amount of pain, like your soul being ripped in half - whatever that meant. But a soul wasn't a physical thing so surely the pain wouldn't be physical? Either way, I didn't want to find out. It frustrated how trivially this was being treated, how everyone just accepted whatever Mikhail wanted them to do and how Amara selectively answered my questions. Like when I asked her what a Luna meant, she had told me I would find out eventually, rather than just telling me. Was it a word of importance?

I eyed Jacob warily. He didn't hate my presence enough to completely ignore me, I was sure of that much. I wasn't even sure what was said about me to warrant such a strong loathing. "Do you know what Luna means?" I asked, deciding that there was no harm in asking as I hated to be in the dark.

Jacob stopped suddenly in his tracks, his body frozen.

"What?!" He asked, turning around to face me, his expression changing from the constant annoyed look when I was around him to one of anger.

"Um, I asked what the word Luna means", I repeated, a little hesitantly, taken aback by the sudden change in mood.

His eyes darkened as he prowled towards me, his eyebrows furrowed. "What?" He spat out.

"I- Uh- I asked-" I stammered, my mind momentarily blank. Jacob grabbed my shirt with both hands and slammed my body back against the wall, my back hitting the wall painfully as the air was knocked out of my chest. I kept my cry of pain from escaping my lips because I didn't want to give him the satisfaction to see his intimidation tactic had worked.

"Just shut up", he snarled as his eyes darkened, his face a mere few centimetres away from mine. "Shut the hell up. How do you know about that word?"

I felt my heart stop as his fingers elongated into a sharp point and he gripped my throat, the pointed ends digging in.

"Amara mentioned it to me", I wheezed out, trying to angle my neck back as to reduce the pain.

"Don't ever use that term", he hissed, his voice dangerously low. "You don't deserve it. That's not your title, you whore".

"I'm no fucking whore", I hissed back, enraged.

"Yes, you are", he spat out. "We all know exactly what you are!"

"You know nothing!" I shouted back in pure rage. "You know only what the son of a bitch Mikhail decides to tell you!"

His claws dug in deeper, causing me to groan in pain.

"Don't say his name from your filthy mouth", he growled. "Don't you dare ever use that word again. Don't ask anyone what that term means. Mind your own fucking business".

I gasped for air as his hold on my neck tightened and my hands furiously scratched against his, trying to make him release me. Strike him now, my brain urged, encouraging to rely on my survival instincts. I forced myself to not hit back. They didn't know I had any physical skills and it was too early to reveal it. I had to take them bu surprise in order to escape. But, his grip wasn't loosing, rather it seemed to tighten. Mikhail didn't want me dead yet, so surely Jacob wouldn't go against his precious Alpha?

I am going to die at this rate.

My self-preservation overruled my logic and just as I was about to strike him, he detached his claws from my neck, the ends sliding back into his fingers and I collapsed back against the wall.

He stumbled back away from me and sighed, pacing up and down the corridor. "Sorry", he mumbled, looking distraught.

I gaped at him, anger clear on my face. "You don't lose your temper like that and say sorry as if that will reverse what you have just done". My voice came out coarse as I massaged my neck, still feeling his hands there, partly in shock.

He stared back at me and then ran his hands through his hair anxiously.

"Stay here", he muttered, quickly walking off.

I stayed slumped on the ground. Everyone here seemed extremely volatile. And Bipolar. And used violence without thinking. Maybe as a human, I was more fragile than the average person here?

Jacob reappeared seconds later with a bottle of water, some wet towels and a dry one.

"Wipe your neck with these wet towels and use the dry one to remove the water", he ordered. "And drink some water to help your throat".

"Why? I asked, amused but taking the water gratefully. "It's barely bleeding".

"You need to remove my scent from your neck", he said, barely offering an explanation.

"Is that how strong your sense of smell is?" I asked. "And well, I wouldn't have had your scent on my neck if you didn't decide to strangle me", I added bitterly.

"Well, I- I didn't- For fuck's sake" He sighed. "Let your hair out to hide the bruise".

"Why should I?" I responded, sharply.

"If the Alpha sees that mark, not only will he punish me but you as well", he grunted. "It's better if you hide it".

I swore at him, using every name under the sun and released my damp hair from my hair tie. The bruise was barely visible, a slight shade of pink, hardly noticeable due to my browned skin.

I rubbed the wet towels against my sensitive skin, hissing as it touched the bruised section, going over it with all the wet towels he gave me. Then I wiped off the residual water and handed him back the towels and waited, impatiently, whilst he disappeared to dispose of them. I almost wanted to hurry up to go wherever we were supposed to go just so I didn't have to be a moment longer with Jacob, but a strong feeling of apprehension gripped my heart because I knew I was getting measured. Measured for the ceremony. It was almost as if it was sealing my fate.

When he returned, I followed behind, silently, almost like a prisoner being taken for execution. He stopped in front of a large door and opened without knocking, almost barging into the room. A tall, slender woman stood in the centre of the room, her honey blonde hair pinned up tightly, and glasses perched at the end of her nose as she peered into a notebook with some writing scrawled into it, a pen tucked behind her ear.

She spun as we walked in, her flowing loose dress spinning out from behind her as she gave a scrutinising look, scanning me from head to toe.

"Aha!" She exclaimed. "You're finally here! What took you so long? Never mind answering me, hurry up and take your clothes off, quickly!"

I stared at her in shock. "I'm not comfortable with taking my clothes off, in front of an audience", I said, annoyed.

"Oh, yes!" She laughed. "I forgot humans are slightly more conservative than we are. Silly me. Jacob, shoo darling. I'll call you when we're done".

"But, the Alpha-"

"No buts!" She interrupted. "We have to accommodate to the female human. You'll just be outside anyway".

He opened his mouth to argue, but then seemed to think better of it, closed his mouth and left, slamming the door shut behind him.

"So", she said, her eyes twinkling. "My name is Kaira and I am the official robe marker for ceremonies and events. I was so excited to meet you, we haven't had a human mate in ages and the Alpha's mate too! She grasped my hands in excitement and smiled at me, much like a Cheshire cat. I looked back at her, unsure of how to react. She obviously did not know I was being forced into this and that Mikhail was not my mate. But, she did seem genuinely nice and excited for me.

"It's nice to meet you too?" I offered, feeling put off by how many times my humanity was being bought up as if I were the unusual one.

She grinned and let go of me, almost dancing away. "Quickly stand on that podium and yes, you do have to take your clothes off! I have everything you do, but maybe a little smaller so don't feel ashamed!"

"Can't you do the measurements on top of my clothes?" I objected.

"Can you try on new shoe whilst still wearing your old shoes?" She countered, her eyebrow arched. "Plus, our ceremonial robes have to be fitted! One small mismeasurement can ruin everything!"

I sighed and hesitantly took up the dress I was wearing, feeling uncomfortable wearing nothing but my bra and pants. I stepped on the podium and she circled around my body, scanning every inch carefully.

"Hmm, you have good skin, nothing we need to cover. I'll have to add some support in the dress for your chest. Is your favourite colour white?"

"No, I prefer darker colours", I responded, confused.

"So why are you wearing all white?"

"Mikhail has only given me white clothing", I said, a little bitterly.

"Oh, that makes sense. He likes that colour. That's sweet of you to match his favourite colour".

I sighed. She was sweet but seemed a little... dense.

"What colour would you like the florets? White too?"

"No!" I interrupted, almost in a panic. I wasn't planning on sticking around for the ceremony but just in case things did not work out how I wanted them too - a possibility that was become more realistic and terrifying - I wasn't going to along blindly to what he wanted. "Gold, please".

"I thought you wanted to match with him? Gold as well? But if you insist..."

She scribbled something down in her book and took out the measuring tape roll, unwinding and measuring my waist length. "You know, don't take this personally, but we are very cautious about outsiders, so that is why the pack may seem a little rude to you. They'll warm up to you eventually!" She wrote down a length and then measured the entire length of my body.

I nodded just to satisfy her. The people I saw didn't look at me with caution but with hate. They would never warm up to me. There was something about me that made them hate me so much. Maybe it was because I was human and they thought I wasn't good enough. I automatically lifted my arms up as she went to measure them.

"Do you have a mate?" I asked, hesitantly, to change the subject.

"Ooh, yes, I do!" She said, dreamily. "It was magical how we found each other, really. He was being initiated into the guard and there is a ceremony for those who pass the test. I remember how he came into the room and all of a sudden, boom! The bond flared up and we both knew we were mates. Measuring him was quite... fun", she said, trailing off with a naughty look on her face.

"So it is random? I thought you could smell your mate from a few miles away and don't you both live here?"

"The bond chooses the best time to make itself known. We don't know why, but the bond just knows when the best time to appear and it does!"

I glanced outside the window, watching a few birds fly by as she measured my torso, feeling melancholic almost as my chance of escaping were decreasing and my chance of feeling a bond like that with him were also decreasing. "How does it feel like?"

"It's like... You want to mate with them there and then. Like you've felt so empty, a feeling you have never felt before and your mate is the only person who can fill in that hole. The attraction is irresistible. It's almost the same for everyone so that is a strange question to ask. How did you feel when you met the Alpha?"

It felt like I was punched right there and then as she assumed that Mikhail and I were mates and she seemed so genuinely happy for me. A wave of emotions washed over me and I struggled to control them, rein them in.

"Absolutely fucking nothing", I murmured to myself, absentmindedly. I sighed and gazed forward, wishing to be anywhere in the world but here.

"Excuse me?!"

Hello,

The break from updating was nicceee. Should I do it again? (Just joking, don't kill me lol).

Thank you to the people who left messages for me on my profile or DMed me, it was really sweet and made my day ❤️.

And you know what? I don't care if people don't like my book. Everyone has different tastes and I CHANGED NOTHING (except a few grammatical errors lol).

Question for Today:

Tell me something really crazy you have done

Umm, I have Insta now, follow me there if you want. It's mostly memes and stuff from my books and you can DM me if you like (It's Alphaholic1 or just click on the link in my bio) (And why is Alphaholic stolen😡).

My schedule is back to normal 🥳.

Last first was...  @Fandom01 You're always early somehow tbh, it's kinda sus.

Please, Vote, Comment and Follow.

Whoever was the first comment here -->

Xx