I NEVER KNEW MASHED POTATOES could help a woman get her feelings out. I took all of my anger and frustration and mixed the potatoes in the pot, swearing at random moments and groaning. My body was trembling with anger and I wanted to find Harry and dump this entire pot of mashed potatoes on that perfect head of his. He left almost an hour ago, saying he was going to talk to Jillian and he would be back soon. It was pretty obvious he was mad about me filling out the application to work with Olivia and her family but I still did not understand why he was so mad. If he thought he could control every aspect of my life, he was wrong and he needed to get his mentality checked. I groaned again and some of the potatoes went flying out of the pot. I left the spoon in the pot while I got a paper towel and cleaned up my mess, cursing Harry for making me so angry.

I knew I was wrong for asking for the application in front of him. I was just too excited about the job that I forgot to consider his feelings; however, I had apologized. Still, he was mad at me.

"You shouldn't have done that," he had told me.

"I can pay for everything you want. You know this," he had told me.

"Why would you ask for the application after I told you I could help you? That wasn't right," he had told me.

"Do you not trust me? Good Lord, do you not have any faith in me? Let me help you," he had told me.

Words after words after words that only made me feel worse about my predicament.

If I had said anything back to him, he would have shut up and continued the drive back to the house.

If only.

He wanted a one way conversation—one where he was the only one speaking—and I allowed him to have at it.

It was rare for me to see him that angry.

So when the bomb exploded, I waited it out to see if I would survive.

And I barely made it out alive.

I did not say it to his face, but I refused to depend on a man when I could handle it myself. I wanted this job so I could hurry up and get out of his hair. I knew I was becoming a burden but he was not saying anything about it. I never told him how I caught him looking in the guest bathroom, muttering words under his breath. I wanted to give him back his space and I wanted to know what it felt like to live on my own again. Even if we did become official, we did not have to live together to prove our love. I was not going to tell him this now, though, because of his boiling anger. He thought he could help everyone in the world—be their hero.

But some people did not want to be helped.

I had to admit, moving in with Harry was a wonderful idea. He charged me a much cheaper price for rent and I had been saving up. Soon enough, I was going to have my own money to have my own place. Harry could come visit me there and I could always come back and visit him. We could go out like we did today. I smiled at the thought and opened the oven to check on the baking chicken. The skin was still not the golden brown I was looking for and I closed the oven back, deciding to check on it again in five minutes. My phone sat on the kitchen table and I went to it, turning it on to see if I had any unread texts or missed calls. I frowned when the only text I had was a text reminding me that my phone bill was due in a couple days.

Money. Money. Money.

Why did it not grow on trees?

I took my phone to the stove with me and I went back to stirring the potatoes. They were finished now but I had to keep myself busy. I wondered how Harry was taking things with Jillian. Was he being gentle, caring, too good to be true? Or was he being the complete opposite—straightforward, obnoxious, rude? I rolled my eyes and sat my phone down on the counter. I knew he was being nice with her because he cared about her feelings. If I were in his position, I would be more than nice while letting her go gently. I would not want someone I love leaving my life in such a bad way. I wanted to be able to feel understanding after they left. I wanted to be able to understand where they were coming from, why they suddenly wanted out. I leaned against the counter and exhaled slowly. I suddenly felt as if Harry and I were committing a horrendous crime. I tugged my bottom lip between my teeth.

There was crime everywhere.

Perhaps we were only trying to blend in by stirring up some trouble of our own?

Whatever was going on over at Jillian's, I knew Harry was doing the right thing and I knew he was doing it the right way. I no longer hated Jillian but I strongly disliked her. She had every right to be obsessed with me because her darkest nightmare was probably coming true. My heart ached at the thought of her crying her eyes out and Harry comforting her. I did not want to cause anyone any pain. I turned the stove off and covered the pot of mashed potatoes with the lid. I checked on the chicken and smiled when the skin was a perfect golden brown. I turned the oven off but kept the meat inside. I was not going to eat until Harry returned. I had a small pot of gravy for the potatoes and I had some green beans done and ready in another pot. Everything was finished and when I looked through the freezer earlier for the vegetables, I noticed the ice cream. Tonight was going to be a good one. Harry was going to come back and I was going to try my best to make him happy again. I had made him upset. It was only fair that I turned his frown upside down.

I wiped my hands on my shorts and picked up my phone again, hoping Harry had tried to contact me. I did not frown when nothing popped up on my screen. He probably was not going to contact me until he was around the corner from the house. A part of me wished I had gone with him but his anger pushed me away. I did not want to make him even more angry. I wondered what would have happened if I had gone, though. Would Jillian have attacked me with her claws? I laughed and left the kitchen, going upstairs to my bedroom. I stopped at the top of the staircase and my eyes locked with Harry's bedroom door. It was shut now and I smiled at the thought of being in there last night. I found myself going to his door and raising my eyebrows as I turned the doorknob.

It was locked.

I rolled my eyes and ran my fingers along the wood of his bedroom door. Why did he keep it locked? At one point, he lived alone. Did he keep it locked then, too? My hand went back to the doorknob and I tried again. The door still did not open and I smiled. Why did I feel so bothered by this? I forced myself away from the door and walked down the hall to my bedroom. I sat down on the floor and pulled my knees up to my chest. I laid my cheek down on my knees and closed my eyes, exhaling slowly. I had no idea when Harry was going to come back and I did not have the slightest clue what to do until he returned. Dinner was complete. I did not have any clothes to wash. The floors were clean. I frowned and removed my cheek from my knees. There was nothing to do around here.

I needed to get out for a little bit.

I grabbed my shoes and put them on as I made my way downstairs. I ran my fingers through my hair a few times and made sure my clothes were all right. My car keys sat on the small table by the front door and I grabbed them, unlocking the front door and slipping outside with my purse over my shoulder. The stove and oven were off so the house would not catch on fire. The food was covered so bugs were not a problem, not that the house had any to begin with. I squinted my eyes as the sun nearly blinded me and I locked the door before hurrying to my car. I knew I could not stay out for long and every passing second was precious. I smiled as I remembered what Harry told me. He had every right to be afraid of time.

Time was precious.

It slipped between our fingers like sand; frail and delicate.

And disappeared within a blink of an eye.

The drive into town was not a long one and before I knew it, I was in a part of Seattle I had never been to before. The buildings were suddenly smaller and the amount of cars were limited. The people walked on the sidewalks and I felt hypnotized to join them. I parked my car in a parking spot on the side of the road and got out, my mouth hanging open as if I had just won the lottery. People were coming in and out of the small shops and I shut my car door, stepping onto the sidewalk to join everyone else. I was right in front of a coffee shop and I snickered, thinking about how Harry and I were slowly becoming coffee addicts. I looked around and spotted a little thrift store a few stores down from where I was standing. My grip tightened around my purse and I started making my way toward the store, muttering, "Excuse me," and "I'm sorry," whenever my shoulder bumped into someone else's.

I opened the door to the store and the place smelled like every other thrift store I had ever been into—hundreds of items of used clothing together in one room, my nostrils concentrating on all their former wearer's scents mixed together to create the familiar 'Thrift Store Funk.' The place was not very bright and I noticed curtains covered the windows, only allowing in a certain amount of sunlight. There were a few people looking at the clothes and I walked passed by them with a smile on my face. The woman behind the desk was looking down at her phone, not once showing anyone in the store any attention. I ran my fingers along the glass separating me from the jewelry. I was tempted to press my nose against the glass to get a better look. While everyone else was looking at the clothes, I was the only one looking at the jewelry.

"See anything you like?"

The woman who was on her phone was now looking at me and her device was nowhere to be seen. I cleared my throat and looked back down at the jewelry.

I pointed to a silver ring at random, "Can I see this one?"

She opened the glass case and retrieved the ring I wanted to look at. She handed it to me and I placed it on the palm of my hand as I got a closer look. It was obviously too big for any of my fingers—including my thumb—but it looked like it could fit one of Harry's fingers. I smiled as I noticed the letters on the ring actually formed a word.

'PEACE.'

That was exactly what we needed.

"How much?" I asked.

"It's carved on the inside of the ring," she said and pointed. "You're holding it."

I looked at the inner part of the ring and saw the price. I sat the jewelry down on the counter and fished for my wallet in my purse. Inside of it were a couple dollar bills and I handed the money to the cashier. She checked to make sure the money was real before putting the money into the cash register and placing the ring into a small paper bag. I put it in my purse and turned to leave the store. I pulled out my phone and frowned when no one had tried to contact me. I decided to call Harry and I put the phone to my ear as I walked out of the store.

It rang once before going to his voicemail.

I tried again.

Straight to voicemail.

I pursed my lips together and hurried back to my vehicle, ready to go back home to see if he was waiting there for me. I slipped inside of my car and sat my purse on the passenger's seat. I decided to send him a text message for him to see. The conversation between him and Jillian had to be going somewhere if he was ignoring my calls.

To: Harry

On my way to the house. Hope to see you there. Don't eat without me. xx

I tossed my phone into my purse and turned my key in the ignition. I gnawed on the inside of my cheek as I drove back to the house and I constantly changed the radio station, looking for something to distract me for the time being. I tapped my fingers against the steering wheel and constantly looked out of my window. It was rolled down some and it smelled like the fast food restaurants I was currently passing by. I was excited to tell Harry about the little area I had found. He probably already knew about it but it would not hurt me to tell him. We talked about anything, even if we had already talked about it before. I figured his favorite question to ask me was about my favorite color. He had asked me what it was more than once but my answer was always the same.

Green.

Emerald green.

Like an exquisite jewel.

Or like the color of two eyes that belonged to a very special human being.

I pulled my car into the driveway and frowned when Harry's truck was nowhere to be seen. He did not park it in his garage because he filled his garage with things he no longer used but wanted to keep. He was a bit of a hoarder but I liked that about him. He was never willing to give anything up and he held onto it for as long as he could. I was the complete opposite, though, but I had my reasons. Although most of my stuff was in storage, I was tempted just to give it all up so I no longer had to pay for it. Since money did not grow on trees, it was precious like the limited amount of time we had on this world. Harry offered to help me pay for my stuff in storage when I first moved in but I turned him down. I could not have him paying for everything. That was not fair to him or to me. I was not going to use him for his money...and he had a lot of it. Anyone could look at his house and tell. I took advantage of his pool, though. I was not going to pay rent and just not use it. I barely used it but I used it enough to make me happy.

I slammed the car door shut and walked up the stairs to the front porch. Unlocking the door, I stepped inside of the house and closed the door behind me, exhaling slowly. The house still smelled like cooked food and I knew it was probably cool now. I did not mind putting it in the microwave. I sat my keys down and made my way into the living room. A groan escaped my lips as I plopped down on the sofa. This was the sofa I had laid Greysen on the night we all went out to the club. If he had not said anything about me losing my house, who knew where I would be right now? I chuckled and pulled the paper bag out of my purse. I carefully took out the ring and put it on my thumb. I rotated it a bit and laughed at how big it was on me. I put it back in the bag and pulled out my phone. Harry had not replied to my message but I was sure he had seen it. I scratched my head as I decided to give Olivia a call. She knew what was going on between Harry and I. Perhaps she knew what was holding him up?

The phone rang twice before going to her voicemail.

I frowned and tilted my head to the side. Why was no one answering their phone? I sat my device on the cushion beside me and ran a tired hand down my face. It had to be a coincidence. Olivia was probably still at work and her phone was probably on silent and put away. Harry was probably trying to show Jillian how he saw things from his point of view. There were millions of possibilities and I just had to wait it out. He would be home soon and we would eat dinner together. We would find our happiness again and work things out. Our argument seemed silly now and everything was going to be fine once he returned.

But he never did.

He never came back home that night.