-11-

Yesterday Zhan and I had a date. We celebrated a little that we have been a couple for a month now. I had been totally excited all day because Zhan just told me in the morning before we left for work that he had a surprise for me in the evening.

When it was finally evening, Zhan took me to the ocean. He had rented a yacht for one night. We went out to the sea, ate together under the stars, danced and held each other in our arms. This is exactly what I had wished for. Only a week ago I had told him how much I would like to do that one day. And he fulfilled my wish, as a surprise.

The water seemed to stand still and pause in the night. But I could only recognize the dark water because the stars were reflected in it. Out there on the sea, there was nothing else. Only Zhan and me, the water below us and the stars above us.

Soft music rang out through the speakers as we lay on the floor and looked at the stars. It was very cold that night. But I hardly noticed the cold. Because I was in the arms of Zhan and whenever he is with me, I feel warm and safe.

When we were inside, under deck, we lay cuddled together under a blanket on a comfortable double bed in front of the TV. We watched and a comedy. But I wasn't really interested in the film, because I only had eyes for Zhan anyway.

I leaned over to Zhan and blocked his view of the TV. He looked at me questioningly and I asked him, "Wouldn't you rather look at me than this movie?"

"Well, sure, babe. But when I look at you now and we kiss again, it's very hard not to get any dirty thoughts." Zhan replied.

"Um, ZhanZhan?"

"Mhm?"

"If I were a fruit, I would be overripe. I' d be rotten before you even touched me."

"Huh? What are you trying to tell me?"

"Can't you guess?"

"Yes, I can. But I thought we were going to wait."

"We've been together a month. We've been sleeping in the same bed for four months, cuddling and kissing. How long do you want to wait?" I admit I'm getting really impatient. If I was afraid of the first time with Zhan before, I couldn't wait any longer.

"Are you sure you want to?" Zhan asked me needlessly.

"Yes Zhan! I want it!" I said very clearly.

Zhan grinned at me cheekily, turned off the TV, turned me around so I was lying on the bed and kissed me. And that night, we had made love for the first time. And it was great! It was just like Zhan's mom told me to just relax and let Zhan do everything else.

When I woke up, I watched Zhan sleep. Just like I had done the first time I spent the night at his place. My heart was racing with happiness when I saw him lying there like that. Only now do I really understand what love means. Because Zhan is giving it to me every day.

With him, I realize how a relationship really works. I don't need two jobs to be able to afford the rent for an apartment. Nor do I need two jobs to give him lots of expensive gifts. He loves me anyway and that just the way I am. Or as Zhan always says, because of who I am.

When Zhan also woke up, he gave me a kiss and told me to stay in bed. He got up and made breakfast for both of us and then brought it to our bed. He fed me fruit, rolls, and a yogurt, and whenever I said, "ZhanZhan, I can do this by myself." he shook his head and explained to me that he loves me and therefore wants to spoil me.

After breakfast, Zhan put everything away and took care of the dishes. Then he went into the bathroom. I secretly followed him and joined him in the shower. After last night, I just can't get enough of Zhan and told him that we could continue where we left off last night.

Zhan pulled me to him, closed the shower door and pushed me gently against the wall. He looked deep into my eyes and said, "You know I will never let you out of my life again, don't you? Ever since I first saw you in the ambulance, I wanted to be with you. I fell in love with you at first sight and I am overjoyed that you return my feelings. And I hope that we'll stay together for the rest of our lives."

"ZhanZhan, I've never loved anyone as much as I love you, and I wish for the same. I was always content before. But now I know what it means to be really happy and to really love. And I never want to give that up again." I replied.

I believe that if True Love really exists, I have found it in Zhan. After everything that happened to me in life, I no longer believed that anything really good would happen to me. And then Zhan came and showed me that nothing is impossible. He proved me wrong when I thought I would never be happy.

When we finally got home, I immediately crawled into bed and pulled Zhan into bed with me. Zhan held me in his arms and we fell asleep for a while.

Later we woke up again when my cell phone rang. My big brother called me. Since he was in the hospital and we talked for a long time, we have been in regular contact with each other. We have even met a couple of times since then. He gets along very well with Zhan, which makes me really happy.

This time, however, my brother had called because there was bad news. My father is in hospital. There is a suspicion of a heart attack. Zhan and I left immediately, because my father yelled at the nurses and doctors that he would not get treatment until he talked to me.

I went to my father's room and his wives stood outside the door and waited. Zhan accompanied me into the room, but kept his distance.

My father saw me and even before I sat down on the chair next to his bed, he started talking. "Yibo I want to apologize to you for everything I did to you and your mother. I know it is too late for that and an apology is not enough. But I want you to know that I am sorry. And I also want you to know that I'm sorry for everything I said about your boyfriend. I have no objection to your relationship. I just needed to process the fact that you have a boyfriend now. But I'm glad that you're finally happy. I should never have interfered in your life. Because it was your brother who told me what happened. I can't undo any of this, but I can make sure that I won't make such mistakes in the future. I hope that one day you can forgive me."

"Well, I'd say you get the operation and we'll talk when you're feeling better. Right now I'm very far from being able to forgive you. Give me time to think." I said to him.

Does he really believe that I can forgive him just because he apologized to me now? It's not that simple and I won't forgive anything that simple. If I will and can ever forgive him at all. And who knows if he really means it. I can't believe him and I certainly can't trust him anymore.

But we didn't have much more time to talk either, because my father was taken out of the room.

His main wife looked at me thoughtfully and I asked her if she wanted to tell me anything. But she shook her head first. Then she changed her mind again and said, "Your mother would be happy to see how well you are now and how happy you are. You smile all the time and you remind me a lot of your mother when I first met her."

"What was she like? I mean, before she married my father?" I asked her.

"She was cheerful, bright, fidgety all the time, making everyone around her laugh. I guess that's why I fell in love with her."

"If she had feelings for you, too, at least for a while, why didn't you two just go away together? Why did you stay with Dad?" I wondered that ever since she admitted she was in love with my mother.

"Well, my marriage to your dad was arranged, and if I'd left him, my family would have cut me off. Especially if they found out that I was in love with a woman. And I had already been a mother, I didn't want your brother to grow up without a father, or your father to take him away from me. Like it was usually done back then. And your mom, well, she was torn between me and your father with her feelings. She loved us both the same way."

"So she couldn't make up her mind."

"No, she couldn't. Until your father got her this apartment and we couldn't see each other anymore. Because from then on, her feelings were only for your father, and later for your father and you."

"To be honest. After you told me about your love for her, Zhan and I found three more diaries of her in my boxes of old mementos. And in each diary, she wrote about you. And what she wrote always made me think these were my father's diaries. But after your confession, I realized that only my mother could have written this."

"And what did she write?"

"She wrote in an entry: "I cannot tell or show her my feelings. I'm afraid if I do, I'll collapse with longing." And she wrote half a year before she died: "I regret every day that I could not tell her how much I loved her. I forced myself to stop loving her, but the feelings were still always there. But I can't go back." Well, and I also found a letter she wrote you."

I looked for it in my pocket, because I wanted to give it to my brother the next time I met him, to take this letter to his mother. When I found the letter, I gave it to my stepmother and she read it to herself crying. I don't know what the letter said, but it made her cry bitterly.

When the operation was successfully completed, Zhan and I went home. We did not want to sit there until he woke up. My brother promised to call me as soon as he was awake and responsive.

Once home, Zhan and I cooked together, ate and watched another episode of our new favorite TV show in bed. When the episode was over, my brother wrote me a message: "Dad's awake, he's fine."

Zhan took my cell phone out of my hand and put it on the nightstand. And since last night, I know his look only too well and I was absolutely ready for it.

The next chapter is also the last chapter... (It is only a short story)