Mark watched as Sean entered his apartment building, waiting a few minutes before moving the car and parking a few blocks away on a side street. He got out and started to sweep the area on foot. He walked through alley ways and backstreets, entered every store and restaurant. He got up on the roofs after he was done with the street level, starting at Sean's apartments building and jumping from rooftop to rooftop, scouring the ground from the higher vantage point. It took the better part of an hour and by the end he had found nothing. Nada. He couldnt find a single trace of vampire presence in the area. He wasnt sure if that was a good thing or not.

Mark finally relented his search, deciding he would come back at a later date and headed back to his car. As he drove home he kept trying to figure out a plan of action with Esma, but he found himself being distracted constantly by thoughts of Sean. He tried his best to stay focused on the danger at hand, but after a while he sighed to himself. It was futile to fight it, and really, there wasnt any harm in indulging a little.

As he drove he let his thoughts drift over to Sean, letting the images of his smile, his eyes, invoke powerful feelings within him, unwinding his tense muscles and leaving him to relax into the seat. His mind's eye could picture him perfectly; his kind smile that showcased his slightly crooked teeth that Mark couldnt help but find endearing. His ocean blue eyes that held a depth to them that even he couldnt fully reach. The way his hair would fall into his face, green locks complementing those bright eyes.

Mark thought back to when he had brushed the hair off Sean's sleeping face, the soft strands on his fingers. He wanted to run his hands through them, feel the softness of his hair against his palm. The image of Sean walking into the kitchen, shirtless, danced through his mind, so clear and so close, as if Sean were actually right there with him. He slid his hand down the steering wheel, and felt Seans skin under his palm instead...

He ran his hand down the soft expanse of Seans pale chest, fingers brushing lightly over warm skin, while his other hand was still tangled in his hair. He could feel the quiver of muscle beneath his hand as it arched towards Mark, meeting his every touch. Looking back to Seans face, he locked onto blue eyes now open, but dark, filled with lust and desperation and begging for more. Mark's eyes flickered down to his parted lips. Sean was breathing heavy, mouthing his name between gasps. He could feel Seans breath against his skin, and it left him shuddering. Seans hands began to wander over Marks body, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. He held the back of Seans head, his other hand sliding around to the small of his back, and he found himself leaning in, moving toward Seans parted lips, wanted to taste him, to-

Mark jolted in his seat as a horn cut through his fantasy, seatbelt digging into his skin. He focused back on his surroundings, looking ahead to see he was sitting at a green light, and the woman behind him was less than pleased, hand held firmly down on the car horn that was still blaring loudly. He hit the gas as he rolled down the window to wave his apology which was met with a manicured finger. Mark shook his head, letting his thoughts dissipate as he turned onto his road. That was a dangerous path to travel down. It wasn't like he hadn't had these fantasies before, but they were usually within the confines of his dreams and not often when he was in the vicinity of his love, other thoughts and fears typically taking precedence. But when Sean was within his reach, thoughts like that were too easy to fall victim to, too easy to yield to. Even now those thoughts still lingered, his own arousal becoming apparent. He needed a cold shower.

Mark turned into his driveway, shutting the car off and dragging himself out of the vehicle. He had barely made his way through the door before Felix was right there, unloading a torrent of questions that Mark had known were coming once he entered the house.

So? How was the drive? What did you guys talk about? You were gone a while, did he invite you into his apartment? Did you get to see his room?

Mark pushed past the babbling Felix, making his way to the kitchen. He turned the tap on, cupping his hands beneath the stream of water as he leaned over the sink, splashing his face. He wasnt going to be having a shower anytime soon with Felix so this would have to do. He repeated it a couple more times, leaning further to drink a bit from the tap as Felix entered the kitchen behind him still nattering away.

I wonder if hes a briefs or boxers kind of guy-

Dude.

Felix threw his hands up in surrender. Well that got your attention at least. So come on man. Fill me in. Felix moved to sit at the island, alert and ready for the apparent juicy details he seemed to think Mark had.

Mark grabbed a hand towel hanging from the oven to dry his face, his muffled words exasperated. Theres nothing to fill you in on. I drove him to his place and we said goodbye. He rubbed his neck with the towel before putting it back. He grasped the counter behind him, facing Felix. I was a while because I spent some time scoping out the area to see if there was any vamp activity, anything to signify that someone's been staking the area out.

And?

Mark huffed. I didnt see anything that alluded to it. I dont know whether or not thats a good thing.

Felix leaned on the counter, arms crossing in front of him. What made you do that in the first place? I know you think Esma wants Sean and all, but why would she have vamps stalking him? She could easily just go grab him if the time comes.

Mark crossed his own arms as he launched into his thoughts from last night, about how the vamps from the pub hadnt been after Mark at all, but possibly watching Sean. When he was done Felix stayed quiet for a minute, processing what Mark had said.

That explains why you were so willing to drive Sean home. He looked back at Mark, the beginning of a smirk on his face. So does that mean we will be seeing more of the little Irish string bean?

Mark felt a bit of heat rush to his cheeks. He coughed and cleared his throat, looking off to the side. Well I mean, he wants the three of us to hangout more. He seems to like your company. Why I dont know. Felix stuck his tongue at him. So its probably safe to say well see him around here more.

Great, so what's the game plan then? Felix rubbed his hands together, smiling as he watched Mark.

Mark looked at Felix in confusion. Game plan?

Felix raised his eyebrows, looking pointedly at Mark. You know, the plan to get Sean in your pants. He stated like it was obvious.

Mark felt his eyes go wide, standing up straight as he sputtered out his protests, hands up in defense. Whoa, whoa there, time out. When did this go from Sean coming over to operation get Mark in his pants?

Oh come on Mark. You cant tell me thats not on your mind, I know you better than that. I watched you as you walked in and made a beeline for the sink. You arent exactly wearing loose pants my friend. Felix nodded towards his crotch. Marks hand immediately shot down to readjust himself, the evidence of his earlier thoughts still making itself known.

Fuck off. Mark sat at the island, out of sight from Felix with his face burning. That doesnt mean shit all. Its been a while and you know it.

Felix raised an eyebrow at him, humming his disbelief. Keep telling yourself that.

Nothing like that is going to happen. Mark stared at Felix with a level gaze, voice hard.

Just like how you werent going to spend any time with him at all. Felix leaned back and spread his arms wide. And that went oh, so well.

Mark made a frustrated sound, leaning back in defeat. Okay yeah, that didnt work out. He brought his hand up, pointing at Felix in earnest. But! But, that has more to do with the fact that he could be in danger. So having him around is for his own protection. It was true, in order to protect Sean, and look out for Esma and the others, he would have to keep Sean close. Didn't mean he couldnt take some enjoyment from it though. My original decision still stands. I still need to keep him at arms length until I figure out what's going on, how hes involved. Mark crossed his arms and eyed Felix. Why are you pushing this so much? I mean, I always expect a bit of encouragement in the beginning, but then you let it go. You know why Im doing this.

Whenever an iteration of Jack entered his life, whatever iteration of Felix he was with would encourage him to make the most of it, but in the end respected his decision, whatever it may be. Usually he would avoid Jack for as long as possible. There was the odd time he would allow himself to fulfill his desires, when they were too strong.

It rarely ended well.

Because I know it will make you happy, and its obviously what Sean wants too. I know youre scared to let him in. I cant imagine what you must be feeling, seeing one that is the exact image of your first Jack. But Mark, what if this is a good sign? Wouldnt it make sense, that you finally end this and get to be with Jack, with Sean, after losing him in the beginning? Him being the same is like the cycle coming to a close, a full three sixty. In the grand scheme, what do you really have to lose at taking the chance, that's different than normal? Isnt that chance at happiness worth it? I know you think you dont deserve it but Mark, Felix took a breath, Mark could see he was getting worked up. I dont know anyone more deserving of happiness. Let yourself be happy. He reached over and grabbed Mark's hands. Please.

This was an old argument between them. Mark knew he wasnt necessarily a bad person, but he had made some horrible mistakes in his past. Mistakes that he can never make up for, and ones he will never forget. Felix seemed to think that he should forgive himself for what he did, that it wasnt his fault. Ha. Wasnt his fault. The memories of the blood on his hands made that very clear. He would live with it forever and he could never be fully deserving of true happiness. Of Seans or Jacks love. Not after that.

Weve been over this Felix. You know nothings going to change. Mark pulled back from Felixs grip. He wasnt in the mood to have this conversation right now. Im going for a shower. Enjoy your night with Marzia, I assume youre leaving soon?

Felix looked like he was going to say more but thankfully dropped it. Yea, I was going to head out after you got back. Ill let you know if Ill be home tonight. Mark nodded and left the kitchen, heading to the bathroom upstairs.

Mark slowly shed his clothing, letting them drop to the floor likes weights, though he didnt feel any lighter. Under the hot spray, Mark felt tears slip down his cheeks, mixing with the water as the emotions and events of the last week finally caught up to him and it wasnt long before he was heaving and gasping through sobs. He circled his arms around his stomach, sinking down to the floor of the shower stall. His shoulders shook uncontrollably under the scalding water. He wasnt sure how long he was there. The water had gone cold by the time his sobs had petered out to whimpers then to silence, as he sat in the shower, eyes unfocused.

Eventually he got out, dried his body and changed into boxers. He laid down in his bed, staring at the ceiling. The house was quiet. Felix was gone, he hadnt heard him leave while he was in the shower, too overwhelmed by emotions. He half-heartedly scolded himself. He knew better than to let his guard down like that, but in the moment he couldnt bring himself to care. After having all that raw emotion vented from his body, he was left feeling hollow, empty. As he laid there, Felixs words echoed through his mind. Be happy, take the chance. What if

Mark scowled at the ceiling, turning on his side. He tried to tamp down on it, that thought, that feeling. He couldnt afford to think like that, there were too many risks, too many dangers. Tomorrow he was officially on holidays and he had a lot of work to do, starting with finding those other locations. Mark felt himself actually drifting a bit, exhausted by his breakdown. As he slowly let his consciousness slip, that feeling he had, that he tried to barricade away to a place he couldnt feel, latched onto his heart, filling his night with dreams of green hair and blue eyes.

That feeling of hope.