"How...why...what?" I couldn't even talk.

"After what happened, you left. I thought..." He pressed his lips together thinking of what to say.

I just stood looking at him.

He wanted to know if I was okay? Why?

"I'm okay..." I half smiled.

"I can tell that you're not." He sighed.

My eyes widened.

"You wanna cry, but for some reason you can't." He said. "You don't get much sleep at night because of bad dreams."

"Okay, enough." I sighed. "Thanks for making sure that I'm okay."

I went to close the door but he stopped me. He took a piece of paper out.

"My number." He handed me the paper.

I was confused. I didn't know what to say. I just smiled and bowed. He smiled and walked away.

Awkward much?

I went back to the bathroom and took my shower. He's right. I couldn't cry. Even when I wanted to. I couldn't. After my shower I cleaned up the house and started dinner.

My dad is always cooking even when I can cook. He's always doing it. He doesn't give himself a break.

I sat down at the table in the kitchen. I pulled out the paper with his number on it. I sighed and typed his number in.

Paige
Hi...

Random cute guy
Hi, are you okay

Paige
Yeah I'm good

Paige
What's your name?

Random cute guy
Kihyun

Paige
Kihyun?

Kihyun
Yeah yours?

Paige
Paige. I don't like my name though

Kihyun
Why?

Paige
My name means "young servant"

I sighed. Why did my parents have to name me that.

I felt a sudden sadness when he didn't text back.

Did my name scare him off?

Kihyun
Well I think your name is beautiful

I laughed.

My name? Beautiful? No.

We talked the rest of the day. I found out he's Korean. He moved her for college. He's studying English. He wants to be singer.

Paige
Do you plan on going back home? To South Korea

My dad walked in. He looked exhausted. I put my phone down rushing to my dad.

"Oh dad." I grabbed his jacket and helped him sit down.

"Smells good in here." He smiled.

"Yeah, I'm cooking." I smiled back at him. "Roasted chicken and vegetables."

"Ooo sounds good." He nodded relaxing.

I ignored my phone as it dinged. I wanted to spend time with my dad. It's what makes him happy. Well a little bit, I can see the struggle my dad is going through. I can see that he wants to give up.

I want to tell him it's okay to cry, but how can I when I can't even cry. How can I comfort him when I'm at my breaking point?

Dinner went by silently as always. We had small talk here and there but that was it.

"Get some sleep." My dad patted my head before walking away.

I walked into my room and got ready for bed. I looked at my phone seeing text messages from Kihyun. I pouted seeing his worried text messages.

Paige
I'm okay, goodnight

Kihyun
Goodnight, see you tomorrow

With that being I forced myself to sleep.

☆☆

Believe in yourself, even if you feel like turning back time. Don't run away. Little by little you will get closer to achieving your dreams.
- TVXQ's Yunho