This chapter is dedicated to kumisawriter my talented bff thank you ❤️❤️

I was woken up by the sun brightly shining in our room he's naked body wrapped in mine I dont regret it I really Dont.... it felt right I might have screwed myself over but fuck it I was horny and he's my husband.

I got out of bed and he rolled over I must have knocked him out* I laughed to myself*...can I allow myself to fall in love with him? Can I trust him? What if he breaks my heart again I won't survive this one I'm too invested shit I love him again but the truth is I was never really over him...I really need to calm down...

I limped to the bathroom because my ankle hasn't completely healed... took a shower and took out my clothes...

It's kinda windy so this is perfect and no heels for me for a while should I wait for him so we have breakfast together?no, I want to avoid him because I Dont know how he feels I mean?...so I left and had breakfast alone and went back to the beach...

I had a lot to think about....

The truth is when Paul did what he did in high school.... I got sick so Tia took me to a doctor and I found out I was 8 weeks pregnant.. We had to go to another state to get the abortion done because if not my parents would have found out and id be dead....

I was scared raising a child being 18 and not having a support system my child would suffer because of me I couldn't risk it....it took me years to me to forgive myself what kind of a person does that I know if it got out everyone would judge me so I tried so hard to hide it with Tia and Freddies help he was against it but he loved Tia so he helped me .

That's why I allow my dad to punish me I somehow felt like I deserve it because I felt like a horrible person ...I cried a bit thinking about those moments...Tia was there for me and Freddie I appreciate them so much...

We are just beginning to be okay and now I need to be honest I Dont want to tell him he will hate me not that I'd blame him...enough with the sad thoughts Melody....

I was taking other random pictures....of the waves...I loved looking at some surfers in the water they do it effortlessly...took pictures

An old couple joined me while I was sitting taking pictures...they looked so in love they smiled at me and asked me if I'm a tourist after telling them I'm here for my honeymoon they gave me amazing advice on love...and for the first time in a while, I felt like this is exactly what was meant to be I guess me and Paul are meant to be right?

Then they asked me to take their pictures which I did of course and then I went round in circles looking for a place to have them printed a nice man showed where I can get them printed and when I was done I went back to them and gave them their pictures.

They wanted to pay me and I told them no it's my present for being together for 45 years...I know love like that still exists...its like when I second guess myself God sends a message to hold on and have faith....

Then we said our goodbyes and they left it was late around 6 pm... Looked at my phone 20 missed calls from Paul...wth Paul...I put my phone back in my pocket .

Julia Michael's hurt again rang signaling that my phone was ringing...

Shit... it's him what do I do...throw your phone in the ocean....urgh stupid voice

"hi"

"Melody where the hell are you? Are you trying to give me a heart attack? "

"Paul please calm down damn"

"Are you okay can we talk"

"Yeah I'm on my way"

"Okay don't strain that ankle okay"

"Yes dad I won't thanks"

Then I hung up and began my walk back to the hotel  ...I limped but finally I'm home...

I sat down and took a deep breath

"Look who's back "

"Sorry about that I was taking pictures then met a nice couple and lost track of time"

"hmmm can I see I know you carry special moments in your camera"

"okay"

I handed him my camera and he saw my pictures and smiled at them..

Then we looked at each other...I can smell his cologne...I'm looking at his pink lips and what they did last night....he is literally delicious...we kissed and I couldn't stop his lips are addictive...yeap I'm.screwed...

"Mel"

"Paul"

"I Dont regret making love to you "

"I...Uhm...I need to shower"

"Mel please sit down "

"Okay"

He sat next to me massaged my ankle again and wrapped it up thank God I blew off some steam I didn't feel some type of way ...

He gave me food and we sat and ate in silence.

"About last night," he said

"It was a one-time thing it's okay no need to make it awkward  okay I'm a big girl now"

"I enjoyed it"

"Me too"

"Can we....."

"Nope" I got up and got to bed

"But"

"No paul "

"Will you ever forgive me and let it all go"

"I have forgiven you Paul its just ....we need time to figure things out"

" I want us to start over lets talk soon okay"

"okay Paul"

" think about it okay no pressure "

"yea Paul thanks"

After a moment of silence...

"Mel what happened with your dad"

"I dropped out of college I was studying business management I only studied it to make my dad happy because I knew if I didn't he would hate me"

"so he feels that you let him down"

"yes so I hated how much I failed I started to feel like I'm not as smart as I thought I was....but it wasn't that I didn't have a passion for it"

"yes"

"so one day I had enough and changed my major the idiot Mr. Smith called my dad and he came to school shouting and telling everyone what a failure I am"

"Mel" I started crying because losing my dad hurt so much I don't think he understands how treating me like that hurt me...

"and he asked if I'm going to go on with business or drop out and I dropped out which means I lost my dad, car and everything he did for me"

"I'm sorry Mel"

"it's okay I'm okay it took some time still hurts a bit but I can't force him to love me you know"

He just held me and it felt good to finally have someone to listen without judgment...Tia had her own life but Paul is a part of mine now and I'm grateful...

"Thanks, Paul... I'm going to sleep now goodnight okay"

"you don't have to thank me ....goodnight beautiful "

"Paul"

"Yes babe"

"I need to tell you....uhm something"

"Okay I'm listening "

He looked at me and I couldn't...I couldn't break his heart...

"I appreciate your support"

"Are you sure that's all you wanted to say"

"Yeah sweet dreams "

"bye babe"

I covered my face but the smile on my face from how nice he is...he's older and wiser right? He won't screw me over this time I mean? Urgh, I hope I'm right about him Tia must get out of my head with this meant to be talking.

The following day we woke up and he told me to get dressed we are going sightseeing I shouldn't forget my camera.

So when I was done we went out I took my bikini and coverup dress just in case and we left..... I let him hold my hand...

"Are you done finally babe " he rolled his eyes

"fine grumpy pants"

"I just want us to go please "

"ok paul"

We went for a nice cruise on a boat and I enjoyed myself the pictures we took were amazing he's amazing we are laughing he's such a comedian urgh he should stop doing that to me.

Pura Ulun Danu Bratan

Heaven's gate, Pura Lempuyang

"Thank you so much, Paul"

"you're welcome "

"did you know we are coming here"

"yeap I had choices and this one was the first choice I knew you would it love more "

I smiled and hugged him.

"I guess you are not that bad"

"huh...."

"now the final surprise its just a party sort of vibe thing " I couldn't help but laugh at him

B9B Seminyak...

We had cocktails ....okay I had many cocktails

Paul had the lawa...

This is what I had and it was delicious ....it's called Sate Lilit.

After I was drunk and full we left and we sat by the beach

We stayed there till it was late I wanted the sunset picture.

"This will have to be my wallpaper"

"okay husband"

"thank you "

"for what Paulie"

"cant a man thank his wife"

"nope"

I rolled my eyes....

"I won't hurt you again Mel I promise"

"Pinky promise" I took out my pinky and we joined them and he kissed our pinky's.

I winked at him and he laughed we stayed for about an hour and we left. I honestly had the best day ever.

After a while, we were tired I think I took enough pictures now I'm ready to go back to our room and rest a bit.

We walked hand in hand and for in our room he showered first then I did it after got comfortable in our bed and drifted to sleep...

"Paul "

"yes babe"

"melody not babe"

"babe"

"thank you"

"you're welcome " then he kissed me I responded...

"how's your hand," I asked him

"ill live "we laughed remembering what happened he's such a baby.

"thank you again no one except Tia takes my passion serious"

"ill always be by your side taking your dreams seriously okay"

"Can I ask"

"yeap"

"What happened to you in high school"

"my sister got killed by her boyfriend and I took it badly I thought love was meant to hurt me so that thought killed something in me"

"I'm sorry I never knew that"

"I know babe I'm sorry for that night okay Jason wasn't meant to take a video I just wanted your virginity not to embarrass you"

"Yes"

"Huh" he said

"Let's start over"

"Really Mel"

"But we need to take it slow Paul I'm still scared"

"Thank you, Mel"

Then he kissed me and we fell asleep...

I was happy I slept like a baby the rest of our honeymoon Paul spoiled me and made me feel things I've never felt before I was happy he was with me....

I really enjoyed our honeymoon and made the best of it I remembered Tia's mom saying this after I punished myself for the abortion.. "every time you feel down just remember people can't change your heart never let their bitterness change you because you are beautiful all the way down to your soul fight for it baby even your parents shouldn't take that from you, you are allowed to be happy enjoy that shit" I smiled she was right.....