"I'm not big on looks but with her, I felt like I just hit the jackpot." - Omar Ali, CSL.

C H A P T E R S E V E N: REGRET

Harun Bashir

"Conratulations dude you're finally married!" I exclaimed as I clapped my best friend on his back. I'm seriously happy for him. Alhamdulilah that he married a decent girl even if that girl just happened to be Bayan Ameer. She really is a great person and I know that she will be good for him.

Although I hate to think about it, I remember most of what happened that dreadful night, I remember calling her and her coming but after that everything else is just blank. I shouldn't have drank that night! I had no business being there. I guess I was just really upset that day and I needed to let loose. I know that it was wrong for me to do that, to be at that party and to drink alcohol but I had been going through so much at that time.

Nonetheless, none of that is an excuse for my actions and I have been spending the past year repenting for my actions. I just hope that she doesn't hate me too much.

I was walking alone at night to my house because I had a lot on my mind and I tend to figure things out when I'm walking. No matter what I did I kept on thinking about my mother over and over again, the last time I got to hold her, the last words she said to me. i still can't wrap my mind around the fact that she is no longer here. I shook my head as I continued to walk, I have to stop thinking about her or else I don't know what I will do.

"Yo Harun!" My friend Andrew shouted as he drove up to the side walk I was walking on.

"What's up dude?"

I asked as I walked closer to his car. I then noticed that there were to other guys in the car as well, I recognized them as my fellow members of the football team at school. "Nothing much, just heading to a party at Sam's house. Want to tag along?" He offered. I thought about it for a second then nodded. I need the distraction.

"Sure."

I made a really big mistake that day and I'll always regret it for the rest of my life. I always pray for forgiveness every time I think about it and I think I always will. Ya Allah please forgive me for that, I prayed once again. "Yeah I know I still can't believe it! Congrats to you too, I hear you're getting married next month." Omar said as he tossed a bottle of water. My dad has been telling me to marry this girl named Alima since freshmen year. I ran into her one day at Starbucks and I knew I just had to. I know it's cheesy and all but I knew that I just knew that she was the one for me. I know what you're thinking and no, this isn't a Bollywood movie where the guy and girl bump into each other and immediately fall in love and music starts to play in the background. It was just something about her that intrigued me and alhamdulilah she feels the same way, or at least I think she does. Then again she wouldn't have accept my proposal if she didn't .

"It's crazy I didn't think that we both were going to be married before our freshmen year of college." I said with a small smile. "Speaking of that, I'd love for you and Bayan to meet. Isn't it about time?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Meet Bayan again? A part of me didn't want to see her just yet but the other part of me needs to see her. I need to show her that I'm not the same person I was all of those years ago. Plus she married my best friend so she's kind of stuck with me.

I opened up the bottle of water he handed me and took a sip. "Yeah that would be awesome. It's passed time." I said, putting the can down.

"Great."

* * *

Omar Ali

I don't know why today I felt like looking through the family album. I haven't looked at it ever since what happened to my baby sister Aisha all of those years ago. I know what you guys are thinking, since when did you have a sister? It's just I never talk about her, no one in my family does. Because we know that if we do mention her, especially around mom then we'd all lose it.

It's not that I'm ashamed of her or anything, it's the complete opposite. 

I haven't mentioned her to Bayan or even Harun. My parents don't like talking about her either. Whenever mom does she starts crying and once she starts she can't stop. When she died everyone just changed you know?  If she were alive right now she'd be 15 years old, I always wondered how life would be if she were alive. I immediately remember my little sisters face as if I just now saw her. Her smile, and the way she laughed all seemed fresh in my memory. Every time I think of her I get really emotional and start to cry but today I am holding back my tears.

I was ten years old when she past away in a car accident. She was only five years old, I always wondered why would Allah take away the life of a five year old? She was so young and so innocent, she didn't deserve it. I remember hating the world and acting out after her death, I remember getting into fights almost everyday at school and always being sent to the principles office. Everyone has their own way of venting you know? And that was mine. I traced my fingers over her smiling face.

 "How are you Aisha? Guess what? I got married." I whispered as a tear rolled down my cheek.

I miss my little sister, I miss playing with her and taking her to the park. Sometimes I feel like everyone has moved on from her, you know? But I just can't get past it. At those times I just keep reminding myself that she's with Allah. "What's going on son?" I heard my dad ask from behind me. He must've noticed the picture I had in my hands because his facial expression changed. He sat down next to me and took the picture out of my hands. "You miss her too? I think about her all of the time." Dad said as he cleared his throat.

"I do. I just needed to see her picture right now. Dad I'm afraid that one day I'm going to forget all about her." I confessed. He put his arm around my shoulders. "She's with Allah now and In Shaa Allah she will enter Jannah tul firdaus. We just have to remind ourselves that whenever we think of her." He said as he heaved a heavy sigh.

She's with Allah, I repeated to myself.

* * *

"Assalamualaikum, mom." I said hesitantly to my mother-in-law. 

I decided to stop by and say hello to everyone before heading off to get school supplies. I can't believe I'm starting university the day after tomorrow. It feels surreal, you know She smiled at me before enveloping me in a hug.

"How are you son? Have you come to see Bayan? She's in her room, you can go up and say hello." She responded with a smile on her face as she gave me a light push. "Okay I'll be back." I replied as I headed toward the staircase. I walked upstairs and knocked on her door before heading in. As I opened the door I saw Bayan spread out on her bed as she focused on her phone screen. For the second time I am able to see her without her head scarf on. Her hair long brown hair reached all the down to her back and it was at that moment that I truly realized how effortlessly beautiful she was. I'm not big on looks but with her, I felt like I just hit the jackpot.

This beautiful girl is my wife now. Whoa, that's going to take a while to sink in.

"Salam." I said with a gentle smile on my face. She lifted her head up and looked at me with wide eyes. She must've not noticed the knocking on the door.

"Salam, you can come in if you want." She said as she brushed her hair away from her face. I closed the door behind me and walked further into her room.

"How are you? I haven't seen you since the nikkah."

I asked as I curiously walked around. I've never been in here before, her room matches her personality perfectly. She has light colors all over her room from the light purple wall paper to the light blue carpet. Those must be her favorite colors. "I'm okay. What about you? Aren't you starting university soon?" She asked, setting her phone down.

"Yeah I'm actually getting some stuff I need for it right now."

She suddenly got up off of her bed. "Really? Can I go with you? I have to get some stuff as well." She said batting her eyelashes adorably. I couldn't help but smile at her cuteness. I nodded my head while opening the door. "Your chariot awaits." I said holding the door for her. Is it just me or did I just see a blush on her cheeks? "Why thank you, kind sir. The princess has to go get her crown first." She replied as she gestured towards her head scarf that was lying on her bed.

"Why should the princess get it? Your wish is my command." I walked over to her bed and grabbed the scarf. She quickly wrapped it around her head and walked out the door."Mom can I get some money to get some supplies?" Bayan asked while walking towards her mom. "It's okay I'll pay for you." I insisted. I mean we are married, why shouldn't I pay for her? She quickly shook her head, "Its fine you don't have to." She insisted. I shook my head from side to side with an amused smile on my face. It's funny ho we're tiptoeing around each other. I guess it makes sense though because we're just now getting to know each other. This is starting to feel more and more like halal dating and I like it.

"I know but I want to." I said as I turned to my mother-in-law. "It's fine I'll pay for her. Please don't pay me back. Okay? We're family now, aren't we?"

"Aw you're such a sweet heart." Mom responded with a smile playing on her features.

"Thanks." Bayan added before walking out of the door. After saying goodbye I went after her.

* * *

The car ride was quiet, I don't know what to say and I bet she doesn't either. I wish we were comfortable around each other already. Suddenly Bayan turned on the radio and a song came on. She started humming to the beat. "I remember years ago someone told me I should take caution when it comes to love. I did, I did~" She started singing comfortably. Wow she's really good. I didn't even know she could sing.

Pretty soon the chorus started. "Tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops, write it on the sky line. All we had is gone now. Tell them I was happy and my heart is broken. All my scars are open, tell them what I hoped would be impossible~"

I couldn't help but be amazed at her singing skills.  "You're great."

She turned to me in shock as if she forgot I was even there. "Thanks. "

"No problem."

I parked the car at a local Walmart and turned off the engine. When I'm shopping for anything I usually just get in, buy what I need and get out. I stepped out of the car and opened the door for Bayan. She smiled at me as we walk inside together side by side. Wow now I really feel like we're a couple. At first I didn't feel it much but now I'm starting to, I actually like the feeling. Once we stepped in I grabbed a cart for us. "Hey I have a fun idea." Bay said with a mischievous smile on her face. "Go on." I replied with a smirk. She quickly stepped inside of the cart and gestured for me to push it.

Bayan Ameer

Okay I admit it I actually like being around Omar, it's just something about him. At first I wasn't totally excited about this marriage but right now I'm actually glad I did get married. Right now I'm still sitting in the middle of the shopping cart, having people glance my way every now and then.

"Notebooks?"

I looked through the list and checked it off. "Check!"

"Sharpies?"

Again, I checked it off of the list with ease. "Check!"

I skimmed through the list one more time and noticed that we got everything we needed for him. "All done. Wheel me out." I commanded as if I were really a princess. "Your wish is my command." He replied, wheeling the cart away from the section we were in.

"So what did you need to get?" He asked as he pushed the cart. "Oh just some drawing supplies."

"You draw?"

"Yeah for my internship. I just basically make designs of clothes and if they're good enough the company might actually make it!" I replied with enthusiasm. I really want them to make one of my designs come to life. I showed them my boots and they said that it's a possibility but at the same time I shouldn't get my hopes up. Not a complete no, right? Right now that's all the hope I have but with Allah on my side, I feel like anything is possible.

"That's really cool. You know what's weird? I don't know a whole lot about you and you don't know a lot about me either." He stated with a neutral expression. It's true, we don't know much about each other. I'm sharing my life with this guy and I don't know a lot about him. That has to change.

"How about we spend a whole day together and get to know each other?" I suggested. He smiled genuinely at me, "Yeah I'd like that. Tomorrow?"

"Okay."

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WHAT DO YOU THINK? ARE OMAR AND BAYAN A CUTE COUPLE? I TRIED TO PUT AW MOMENTS IN THERE LOL. WRITE YOUR THOUGHTS PLEASE! I WANT TO READ COMMENTS.

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MWAH!!:) 💋